My home address is #1 Harmony Avenue, Canada. I believe this is a hint from our Teacher. I would like to share with you how the power of Dafa brought harmony to my home--specifically, how Dafa changed my father, who is not a practitioner.
My twin brother and I began to practice Falun Dafa three years ago. Upon seeing the positive changes in our health and general attitudes, my mother also began to practice shortly after us. This left my father feeling a little left out. He believed that if people wanted to search for the truth of human life or to cultivate, then it must be because they were not satisfied with the life they had. Therefore, through his distorted concepts, my father took our wanting to practice Falun Dafa as an insult to our family and the life he had provided for us. In addition, we were the only active practitioners in our whole city, so my father made harsh comments, saying that no one else wanted to learn, that he was embarrassed to say that we practiced, and that we should be careful because it could damage his business.
He frequently interfered with our practice and complained about us spending so much time reading Zhuan Falun and planning Hongfa [introducing Falun Dafa] activities. During this period of time he said a lot of very bad things. I recall one time when the persecution of Falun Dafa had begun in China, some practitioners from Toronto were renting a bus so they could travel to Ottawa to appeal for help from the Canadian Government. My brother and I quickly caught a bus to Toronto in order to join them. We didn't formally discuss this with my father before we left, so when we returned he was furious. He had taken all of our Dafa books and materials from our rooms. We thought he had thrown them out, but later we found them in the garage. He yelled and screamed and threatened us.
I thought that my father would never understand us and would never support Dafa. I developed this concept. I thought that he wasn't a good person and he just created interference for us when we were doing Dafa work. He told me that I wasn't warm and affectionate to him anymore and that he felt as though he was losing his daughter because I no longer spent time with him. I thought that he just didn't understand the importance of what were doing and it would be wasting time to spend a day with him. But what kind of example was I setting? Was this being compassionate? Didn't our Teacher tell us to take care of every environment? Shouldn't I want to offer him salvation as well? How could I expect him to understand what we were doing and why if I would not give him the time of day?
I began to realize the importance of spending time with my father, so I started being a daughter again. I started greeting him with big hugs and kisses, joked with him, and even teased him and made him laugh. I asked him how his hockey game was the night before and how busy he was at work. I sat and listened to him talk about what he wanted to do with the house in order to fix it up. When my brother and I were both at home (from University) we went swimming in the back yard with him and my Mom, then we went for ice cream and rented a movie together as a family. On Father's Day, we took our bikes and went for a family bike ride for the day and picked up Chinese food for lunch. We did traditional and healthy things together. My Dad even called me "kido" again. The other night when we came home from group study, my brother started to run down stairs. My Mom asked where he was going in such a hurry. He said that he wanted to go say hi to Dad before he went to sleep. I followed him. We ran and jumped on my parent's bed, like we did when we were little. My Dad laughed and tried to push us aside so he could go to sleep and jokingly used me as a foot rest.
Time is so precious right now. Every minute is so important. Why did my brother and I spend this time doing ordinary things? Because we wanted to offer salvation to our parents as well. It's important that the people close to us understand what we are doing. Our actions completely changed my father.
In the past he used to threaten us by saying that he would tell everyone that we were in a [slanderous term omitted] because we cut ourselves off from society and didn't do ordinary things anymore. He said that he felt not worthy of talking to us. But now he helps us spread Dafa [universal law and principle] instead.
He says things like, "I know what you are doing is really good and the persecution is awful." Once, he came to a Friends of Falun Gong dinner banquet with us and told all of his friends afterward about how much work we did, how organized it was and all of the important people that were there. He said that he was truly impressed. He was excited to see that my brother, our friend and myself had memorized a Chinese song and got up on stage to entertain the audience. He even stood on his chair happily taking pictures. When I passed by his table to say hello he would ask, "Are you two going to sing another one?"
He started to become more patient and kind to everyone and he didn't yell at us when we told him we were taking time off from work to go to a conference (even though we are students saving for school).
When the self-immolation incident happened in China, it was incorrectly reported in many newspapers before the truth was clarified. When my Dad went into work he found that his boss/partner and business associates had cut the articles out of the paper, spread them across my Dad's desk and said, "Explain this! We know that your family name is all over the city as a contact person for Falun Dafa." This was my father's biggest fear--that our practice would damage his business. But do you know what he said? He clarified the truth to them and explained to them how it was all a bunch of fabricated lies. He could do this because my brother had taken the time to explain this to him the night before. It is very important to tell our families about what is happening so that they feel a part of it as well. I know a practitioner who doesn't tell his wife anything because she gets upset with him because she doesn't understand or agree with his practice. He was interviewed by a local newspaper and didn't even show that article to his wife. I think if he said something like, "Honey, look at this great article in the paper about Falun Dafa! I'm so happy that people in the community are being so supportive. What we're doing is really making a difference. This means a lot to me," then maybe she too would feel a part of it and gain some understanding.
I've also heard practitioners make comments about not spending any time with their families and just doing Dafa work. Do they think that this means they have eliminated the attachment of sentimentality? Isn't everything we do Dafa work, even spending time with our families? Clarifying the truth activities are extremely important, but I think that neglecting to take care of our home environments is an omission.
One time when my parents were playing cards next door, our neighbor said something about human rights in China turning into a "sour grape" because it's in the news so much. My Mom said, "You're right! It is in the news too much, but that's only because it hasn't changed yet. Just because China is on the other side of the world, you may think that it doesn't have anything to do with you, but if it was happening in Canada and affected you, you would feel differently about it. Then my Dad added in, "Yes, I'm coming to understand that you do have to keep the pressure up in order for anything to get done." He no longer complains about us spending too much time on projects now and even gives us suggestions.
In addition to my father being supportive of Dafa, he has even become interested in trying it out himself. What I never thought would happen, happened. He started reading the Dafa books and got my Mom to teach him the exercises.
This is Dafa. I hope that we can do better and offer salvation to all those around us without missing a single person.
Our Teacher said, "I know that you've all worked so hard. You have to work and have to study, you have your family life and social activities, and at the same time you have to take care of your family, do a good job at work, and you have to study the Fa well and do the exercises well, and what's more, you have to clarify the truth. It is hard!" (Teaching the Fa at the 2001 Canada Falun Dafa Cultivation Experience Sharing Conference)
How do we want future families to act? We have to remember that we set an example in everything we do and we should be compassionate to everyone. I hope that we can all make our family environments harmonious.
á
Category: Improving Oneself
