(Clearwisdom.net) Recently, I had a conversation with the wife (non-practitioner) of a Falun Dafa practitioner. The issues of harmony in one's family and social relationships came up. Here are some of my thoughts.
1. Perfect harmony in the family
Having perfect harmony allows others to have proper understanding of us, which makes it easier for us to approach them. That is the prerequisite of clarifying the truth to them. Otherwise, people would think that we were these strange people who live apart from normal society and cannot be communicated with. How can people listen to what we say if they think that?
Mr. Wang is a Falun Dafa practitioner. He was illegally detained on multiple occasions. He served hard sentences in forced labor camps and endured the most inhuman tortures. But his steadfast belief in Dafa struck terror in the evil. No matter how the police used threats or torture on him, he never wavered. However, his wife still could not understand his behavior at home. Mr. Wang rarely does any housework, he does not read any book other than Dafa books, he does not read newspapers or watch television, he doesn't put his heart in his work, and he doesn't think about improving his technical skills. In the beginning, Mrs. Wang allowed nature to take its course. Later, she tried to place restrictions on him until eventually she gave up. She said, "Why bother to tell the truth to other people, I cannot even understand you people." Because we did not have perfect harmony in our families, our family members had misunderstandings about the practitioners as one body. That created negative effects in our efforts to clarify the truth.
Conforming to everyday people's lifestyle is what separates us from all the cultivators in history. In order to save numerous sentient beings, we need to be close to the broad masses of ordinary people. That requires us to maintain the lifestyle of everyday people without going to extremes.
Indeed, we have a heavy responsibility and time is pressing. But if we use our wisdom, doing things in our normal living environments without going to extremes, we could often get twice the result with half of the effort. When we can manage the relationships in our family and among our neighbors and colleagues well so that they really understand, sympathize and help Dafa practitioners, the effects on exposing the lies and clarifying the truth cannot be underestimated. At the same time, they would establish a foundation for a wonderful future for themselves. We should pay attention to this type of second-hand truth clarification. Otherwise, people may have many barriers when we clarify the truth to them. And the result won't be as good as it can be.
This kind of harmony is neither ingratiating oneself without principle nor looking for excuses for one's attachment to fame and sentimentality.
2. Perfect harmony in the workplace
During the Fa-rectification period, some practitioners have lost their jobs and some lost their families for various reasons. Have we asked ourselves whether, while exposing the persecution, any losses we incurred were due to our own behavior or the fact that we did not establish harmony with respect to all aspects in our lives? If there is anything in question, we should make a breakthrough and negate all the arrangements made by the old forces.
Some practitioners are living under very difficult conditions; they have not had any source of income for a long time. But they do not want to look for a job and they do not want to come into contact with everyday people, so they live off financial aid from other practitioners. When we are being persecuted without cause, is there a difference between our behavior and what we believe in? We need to do well in our work, and we need to support ourselves. This is the characteristic of cultivation among everyday people; it is also what sets us apart from other cultivation schools.
3. Perfect harmony among practitioners
We are all actively involved in validating the Fa and clarifying the truth. The work requires us to coordinate well and work in cooperation. When it comes to the format and style, there is a big difference among practitioners due to different understandings of the Fa, different trainings we received in life, and different habits and skills. Thus, there are different opinions when we work together. That's when we need to consider the overall situation with compassion, and harmonize the situation by thinking of others first. Otherwise, there will be conflicts and disagreements.
However, perfect harmony is not obliging without reason. It is compromise without altering the principle. It is to have others accept the decision using the best of one's ability. It is also cultivation of one's self in the situation. My experience is that whenever there is a conflict, imagine what Teacher would do if he were here. That usually exposes my problems right away. Then I just eliminate the problems with all the courage I can muster.
At home, we should fulfill our responsibilities as a member of the family. We should use reason, wisdom in our work, and not get trapped into arguments. We should be strict with ourselves and be lenient with fellow practitioners. When we can do well in these, I believe our path to validate Fa and save sentient beings will become wider.
November 15, 2004
