(Clearwisdom.net)
After I studied "Teaching the Fa in the City of Los Angeles," I started to have a clearer understanding of my recent cultivation state. I also have a clearer understanding on how we Dafa practitioners should act for the time being. The following are some of my reflections on certain issues. If fellow practitioners see anything inappropriate, please point it out to me.
1. Locating the ProblemOnly when a person is clear-minded, can he act rationally. If he is in an emotional state, he probably is not aware of his actions, which could easily lead to a life filled with regrets. Looking back, he will realize his attachments and hesitations. When he needed to make a quick decision, he hesitated. Was this not because he struggled with emotions and being muddle-headed?
People know that the Communist Party is evil, but many have still not quit the Party for the time being. People know that Falun Dafa is good, but they cannot become Falun Gong practitioners for the time being. Obviously, there are complex factors and pre-destined relationships at play. But these people have one thing in common: they are muddle-headed. Either they judge issues with their post-natal notions, or their post-natal notions seriously interfere with their judgments. The only resolution is to strengthen their righteous and true thoughts, so that they can make sensible decisions.
As to my current state, I have enlightened as to why sometimes my cultivation state is good, and sometimes it is bad. Why can I not persistently strive forward and work diligently in cultivation? The reason is I had not realized that I was treating problems with an ordinary person's notions, and I treated the parts of me which are not cultivated well as being my true self. How can I consider Dafa as being good if I look at it with an ordinary person's notion? A practitioner's faith should be in Dafa. Isn't obsession itself not letting go of attachments, which are precisely what we need to let go of? I know that Dafa is good and I have been doing the three things. I also understand that I am not diligent enough in my cultivation. However, the feeling that I cannot be diligent is actually a manifestation of not being steadfast in the Fa and lacking righteous thoughts. Also human attachments and external interference can be used and strengthened by the old forces. I did not enlighten to this and after a while, I ended up in a sluggish state. What would a practitioner do who is steadfast in Dafa? This is truly my problem.
2. Sending Forth Righteous Thoughts WellEvery time I feel sluggish and confused, my righteous thoughts are not strong enough and I am not clear about Fa principles. However, I just let it go without thinking it over.
As in the case of global sending forth righteous thoughts at 6:00 a.m., would it make a big difference if I would get up at 4:50 or 5:30 a.m.? Sometimes I do not feel like getting up and want to continue sleeping a little while longer. Sometimes I sleep in. How come I cannot get up on time? I can find plenty of excuses; the actual root cause is that I did not realize the importance of sending forth righteous thoughts and the preciseness of time. If I had thought about getting up a little bit earlier, I would have a clearer mind when sending forth righteous thoughts. If I can truly achieve the effect of righteous thoughts, can I still slack off?
3. Arranging Time Well when Doing the Three ThingsSometimes I wonder how I can arrange my time better in order to do the three things well. If I do not make any arrangements first, then I want to do different things and end up getting nothing done, which is wasting time and that worries me. However, how do I solve this problem? Actually, doing the Three Things well is itself a test for me. Each of the three things are equally important and if my state of mind when doing things is not right, then am I truly a Dafa practitioner? I also have to manage my time well when arranging for clarifying the truth, as well as conforming to ordinary life in society and performing my work well. Which has the highest priority? Obviously, we should not give up on ordinary people's affairs. All of these things are requirements we have to follow.
4. Questioning Ourselves
Cultivation is like "sailing upstream, if you don't progress, you will regress." Whether I can abide by higher standards and make progress is truly a big test for me.
Now I am clear that before I conclude my path of cultivation, I have to continue to cultivate, and I still have to get rid of my human attachments. If I cannot hold myself to higher standards, I cannot make any progress. However, I find myself slacking off many times. I always feel there is plenty of time, and that I can just hang in there. One day I suddenly thought, if Fa-rectification were to end tomorrow, am I qualified today? Would I have some regrets? Without having any attachment to time, we will know what we should do.
5. Understanding "Cultivation Insanity"
In Chapter 6 of Zhuan Falun, Teacher mentions "cultivation insanity" and talks about the demon of lust. There are two sentences: "If you fail the test the first time, it will be difficult to pass it the second time." And "If one who fails the test does not care about it, it will be harder to pass later."
Through studying "Teaching the Fa in the City of Los Angeles," I now understand that the old forces use our attachments and they treat them as something very important. Take for example, the attachment of lust. In the eyes of the old forces, those practitioners who have gone astray, or written so-called "Guarantee Statements" do not deserve to practice Dafa. Even though they do not understand the requirements of Fa-rectification, the old forces also know that Teacher will not easily give up on those practitioners. It does not change them and they stick to the old universe's principles to do things, which has resulted in a very serious situation, where they try to make those practitioners fall down. Every practitioner who has committed such mistakes must be careful to have strong and firm righteous thoughts. If they do not, and stumbled the first time, then still do not pay enough attention afterwards and do not take their future seriously, they will face a very dangerous situation. Chances will be that they cannot pass this test or they are stuck with tribulations for a long time. Eventually, they most likely will not be able to cultivate and will ruin themselves. If they do not change the second time, or if they do not have righteous thoughts and cannot let go of life and death, they truly will not be able to negate the evil arrangements. The old evil forces do that specifically in order to eliminate some practitioners. Sometimes, when I come across some practitioners' solemn declarations, I see that no matter what they say superficially, they try to cover up their attachments within their hearts. I feel very sad because this is truly providing excuses for the old evil forces to persecute them.
Dafa is benevolent, so is Teacher, but whether we can cultivate to the end depends on us.