(Clearwisdom.net) In the past I had not done well in clarifying the truth nor did I clarify the truth to many people. As a result, very few people withdrew from the CCP through my efforts, making me even more unwilling to clarify the truth. I couldn't find where I had gone wrong, so I was also unable to break through this problem for a long time. While reading some fellow practitioners' experience sharing articles, I became increasingly anxious and realized that my human mentality had become stronger.
Two days ago I discussed this issue with one of my fellow practitioners who has done very well in clarifying the truth to people. Every day she stood by the entrance to an elementary school and rallied the pupils to withdraw from the CCP. After hearing about my problem, she said to me, "What good does it do to sit at home and study the Fa every day? You don't even go out and clarify the truth any longer."
After returning home and reading Teacher's articles, I calmed down. Suddenly, Teacher's words flashed into in my mind:
"...for your starting point is matched by no one--it is to save all beings!" ("Fa Teaching at the 2007 New York Fa Conference")
I then understood that my fellow practitioner was right, because her motive was to save sentient beings. However, what was my motive? I didn't break through my own attachments to do a better job in clarifying the truth. Instead I became jealous and picked on her in order to find a way to satisfy my own selfish needs.
The next day, I found her and apologized for my actions. While I was on my way to her home, I recited Teacher's poem "No Obstacles" from Hong Yin Vol. II (Translation Version B)
"Cultivation paths are different
Yet all are within Dafa
With no attachment to anything
The path underfoot is naturally clear
April 16, 2001
The 23rd of the third month, the Year of Xin Si in the lunar calendar
I came to understand that each practitioner has his or her own path of cultivation. I was attached to the number of people withdrawing from the CCP when I saw that other practitioners had done very well in this regard. So I wanted the number of people withdrawing from the CCP because of me to increase. Therefore, my motive was not to save sentient beings, but for myself. After sharing my experiences with my fellow practitioner, she sincerely pointed out that when I clarified the truth, I was always afraid that I didn't explain clearly, so I would quote many different sayings, causing more confusion for my audience. Yes, I was always careful and meticulous about everything I did, including the experience sharing articles I wrote. I always feared that I was unable to communicate clearly, so I kept adding more and more. This made truth clarification more complicated and obscured the key points.
Later, I went to a beauty salon owned by two sisters. I had tried to persuade them to withdraw from the CCP twice, but both times I was not successful. This time I encouraged myself to clarify the truth to them again. As soon as I started talking about it, my mind had already emitted the thought, "They may think that I have a mental problem because I repeat myself too much." When this thought emerged in my mind, I immediately rejected it and said in my heart, "Their true selves must be anxious to know the truth." So while clarifying the truth with righteous thoughts, I successfully pushed the bad thoughts out of my mind one by one. I was very happy for them, because they finally agreed to quit. I also felt good that I had overcome the barriers of emotions created by my human heart.
We practitioners do not need that kind of ordinary people's unity. Instead, conflict between practitioners is a good thing. It can lead us to find our shortcomings so that we can remove our attachments. Through this experience, my fellow practitioner who had a conflict with me also looked inward and discovered many attachments, which were very difficult to find.
I sincerely express my gratitude for Teacher and fellow practitioners!
