(Clearwisdom.net)
Presented at the 2008 Western US Falun Dafa Experience Sharing Conference (Los Angeles)
Greetings Master! Greetings fellow practitioners!
In 2003, I started practicing Falun Gong in Los Angeles (LA) and began my cultivation path. Today, in 2008, I am very honored to be among those presenting their cultivation experiences during this LA Fa conference.
During the past 5 years, I started clarifying the truth by distributing newspapers in LA, then returned to Taiwan and got involved in media work. I returned to LA at the end of 2007. These three phases of my life provided three different cultivation environments. I feel the greatness and the marvel of the Fa and the tremendous compassion of Teacher.
Actually, even before I obtained the Fa, Teacher has taken care of me. The earliest example that I can recall was when I was studying in Massachusetts. When I was very depressed due to the heavy load of school work, my mother came from Taiwan and read the Fa with me. She also taught me how to send forth righteous thoughts. When I was sending righteous thoughts, I felt something rotating in my lower body. It was Falun adjusting all the incorrect states in me.
Soon, after I obtained the Fa in LA, when studying Lecture Two in Zhuan Falun, I saw that the character Fo (Buddha) in the book was bathed in a golden light.
"There is another way to change one's life, and this is the only way: It is that this person takes the path of cultivation practice from now on. Why can one's life be changed if one takes the path of cultivation practice? Who can easily change such a thing? Once this person thinks about taking the path of cultivation practice and once this thought occurs, it shines like gold, shaking the world in ten directions. In its view of the universe, the Buddha School has the theory of the ten-directional world."
When I first obtained the Fa, I was very happy. In those days I followed Teacher's teachings in Zhuan Falun diligently, such as treating every person, event and thing I encounter well. Every day before 6:00 a.m. I would wake up and go to the park to practice the exercises alone. Then, I distributed the Epoch Times newspaper and occasionally put on the hat of a reporter.
I remember there was a bookstore owner who changed a lot after reading the Epoch Times. Later, whenever he saw my car, he would come to help me carry the papers to his store. He also told his customers, "Look at this young lady! Something like this is rare! She volunteers to do this." Then he would distribute the paper to his customers, especially the Chinese people.
I also went to the airport a few days every week, from evening to early morning, to clarify the truth to the Chinese people who were returning to Beijing. I sometimes lost my temper, because I felt that they were unreasonable at times. At times I also felt that everything was so unfair, especially when I was tired. But gradually, compassion arose from deep within my heart and a strength that helped me clarify the truth to people with a calmer and purer mind. After a while, staff at the airport understood the truth, and they often came out of their offices and asked me if I was hungry or needed something to eat.
I remember that once after dance training, my legs were so tired and I was barely able to walk I asked Teacher in my heart after arriving at the airport, "What should I do now? Can I ask for Master's help?" Then, the airport staff who were checking the passports saw me, and said, "You can just distribute your material here right next to us." So, that night I distributed material without moving a step. When some travelers wouldn't accept my flyer, the airport staff took the flyer from my hand and gave it to them.
In 2004, I returned to Taiwan and started cultivation in a new environment. Even though I kept studying the Fa and participated in projects to validate Dafa, among caring parents and fellow practitioners, I developed the attachment to relying on others. I expected my parents to take care of many daily needs which I could have done perfectly well myself. Even for morning exercise, I needed repeated urging by my mother.
In Taiwan, I joined NTDTV to validate the Fa. I was a show host, and also went out for news reports. It was not only easy for me to do these two tasks, but it became smoother as the days went by. There are many practitioners in Taiwan and they are very warm-hearted and amicable. As I was a host of a show or went out to get news report, practitioners treated me like a star. They came to my home and do my hair and make-up
Because of praised and constant catering to my needs by fellow practitioners, I began to feel that I was capable, important, and I developed the attachment to complacency and became a show-off. This attachment got stronger as time went by. When I was visiting the U.S., fellow practitioner told me to be careful and to remember that I am a cultivator. I should not have an attachment to being a star. I took this warning to heart and went back to Taiwan. I looked within and realized that what I was doing was media work to validate myself instead of validating Dafa and save people. All my abilities were due to the mighty virtue of Dafa. I had to let go of complacency and my show-off mentality.
I wasn't easy to get rid of the human attachments. I had to really study the Fa diligently, put my mind in the Fa and remind myself to treat every instance of praise as a test. Now, back in the U.S., I am really grateful to Taiwanese practitioners for their tolerance and help. What I contributed to NTDTV's TV programs or news reporting was not due to my personal abilities, but the power of our group cooperation, which all comes from the mighty virtue of Dafa and Teacher's compassion.
In November last year, I came to Los Angeles again, not as a visitor, but to start married life. I once again entered a new cultivation environment. My husband is a Westerner and also a Dafa practitioner. As two cultivators living together, it was easy to realize that I still have strong attachment to sentimentality. I often wanted everything to be my way, and felt unhappy if my husband didn't comply. I eat Chinese food at home, and I asked my husband to do so too. If he didn't, I was upset. In every little thing I treated myself as very important and was unwilling to think of others first. My husband on the other hand was very compassionate and tolerant. By ordinary standards, I am very happy, but as a cultivator, I know there are some attachments I need to let go.
Teacher said:
"As a cultivator, you have to be a good person wherever you are, and you have to be considerate of others--so in the home why can't you be considerate and understanding of your own husband? Aren't we to leave the future mankind with the best things?" ("Teaching the Fa at the Meeting with Asia-Pacific Students")
"Nowadays people consider emotion really important, yet emotion is one of the most unreliable things. "When you're nice to me I'm happy, and when you're no longer nice to me the feeling is gone." Then how could you count on that thing? Could emotional ties sustain a marriage? With human beings there's not just moral obligation involved, but also, between man and wife, you are indebted to each other." ("Teaching the Fa at the Meeting with Asia-Pacific Students")
"Don't our Dafa disciples have to not return blows or insults, even in the face of evil? Don't you have to forbear? To patiently clarify the truth? Then when you lose your temper, what was that for? What is there for a cultivator to get angry about? And shouldn't there be even less of that when you are with other cultivators? No matter who you are, you are cultivating. How come you always get mad at my disciples? Did I agree to your acting like that towards my disciples? " ("Teaching the Fa at the 2004 International Fa Conference in New York")
As cultivator I need to be responsible to myself. In my marriage, I cannot be self-centered, just because he is my husband and he is tolerant. Not only should I have the kindness and tenderness of traditional Chinese ladies, and treat him appropriately, but I should also have the compassion of a cultivator. I can't be spoiled and short tempered. I cannot let sentimentality dominate me. I know I should cultivate well in this marriage.
Back to the essence of cultivation, in Lecture One of Zhuan Falun, Teacher said:
"the whole process of cultivation is a process of constantly getting rid of human attachments."
I know that over the past years I lived in various cultivation environments, was involved in various projects validating Dafa and that there were always elements of cultivation for me and attachments to get rid of. I am grateful for Teacher's guidance. In the future, I will do better in every aspect, be more diligent and reach the requirement of a Dafa disciple in the Fa-rectification period.
Thank you Teacher! Thank you fellow practitioners!
