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Hints in My Dreams to My Not-So-Diligent Self

May 8, 2008

(Clearwisdom.net) This morning when I woke up early to do the exercises, I remembered my dreams vividly and clearly.

First Scenario: I woke up to find my dormitory empty except for me. I thought, "At last we have graduated, and all my classmates have gone home, but why didn't they wake me up so that we could exchange farewells?" I started getting anxious and began packing and cleaning up after myself. Then I began noticing that all my belongings didn't seem to be getting packed. Whenever I thought I had finished packing, I would find other things I wanted to pack. I became impatient and anxious.

Second Scenario: I was walking down a particular street that had stores that sold very attractive and fine clothes, but there was barely anybody around; business wasn't very good on the street. I thought, "All my classmates have graduated, and they must have gone home. I think I should go home, too." But my attachment to those clothes made me want to stay and look around some more.

When I woke up, I suddenly realized that this was Master hinting to me that I am oversleeping, a lot of attachments haven't been given up, I have an attachment to beauty, etc. These attachments have caused me to waste precious time when I could have been saving sentient beings, and I am ashamed about this.

Oversleeping is my greatest attachment so far. Whenever I do the fifth exercise, I always think, "Forty minutes will be enough; I'll use the other 20 minutes to sleep." This habit has caused me to doze off during the 6 a.m. time to send forth righteous thoughts, never giving the full amount of effort in sending righteous thoughts and eliminating the evil, and skipping this chance to eliminate evil. The reason for oversleeping was that I always wanted to be relaxed and comfortable with things. Even though I knew that doing the exercises would give me sufficient energy even if I didn't get the right amount of sleep, why couldn't I just do it?

My attachment to beauty has also taken up much of my time in eliminating evil and saving sentient beings. Every day on my way home from work, I would always want to take the route along the busy streets. I would peer over here and look over there, and when I came upon a store selling beautiful clothes, I couldn't stop myself from going inside. By the time I arrived home, it would already be past time for sending forth righteous thoughts. Even though I always regretted this, I was still enticed by those clothes.

I now realize that all these attachments are the cause of my not wanting to save sentient beings and being a real cultivator. All these mundane matters have moved me, and I was not even aware of the fact that I was bringing losses to myself.

With the Fa-rectification coming near, I shouldn't seek the comforts of the mundane world anymore. I realize now that it isn't too late to become diligent and that there are many sentient beings waiting to be saved and exposed to the truth.

I thank Master for his enlightenment and tell those practitioners who aren't quite diligent: Hurry up and become diligent. Master is getting worried, and there are sentient beings out there waiting for you. Our attachments have ruined many chances to save sentient beings who have waited for thousands of years, which is our true mission.