(Clearwisdom.net) I was detained on July 19, 1999. After I was released, police officers kept coming to the building where I was staying to harass me. Sometimes they even came to my home. This caused some difficulties for my daily life. I was afraid, so I left home for another city.
Join the Fa-rectification
When I first arrived at my new location, I did not know anyone and could not find the local practitioners. I became isolated and stayed at home to study the Fa and do the exercises. It was extremely painful to see Falun Dafa being slandered and I felt helpless. Later, I went home to see my parents. I found practitioners and learned about their activities to clarify the truth about the persecution of Falun Gong. However, because of fear, I dared not participate. Therefore, I returned to that other city.
Until late 2000, my situation did not change. Although I was not diligent, Teacher did not give up on me, and helped me find fellow practitioners with the help of another individual. After sharing experiences with fellow practitioners, I was shocked. Practitioners were all cultivating themselves diligently, and clarifying the truth about the persecution of Falun Gong. I, on the other hand, stayed at home for an entire year and believed that I was on the right track. I was ashamed. Since then, I have been determined to make up for my shortcomings. I had to catch up with the pace of Fa-rectification. I was very grateful to fellow practitioners. Whenever there were new articles from Teacher or good articles on the Minghui website, practitioners sent them to me. I also became more and more diligent. My understanding of the Fa improved and I started taking part in Fa-rectification activities.
Do not Wait for Truth Clarifying Materials
When other practitioners sent me materials I immediately distributed them, since this was the hope for sentient beings to be saved. To wake up sentient beings, no matter if it was daytime or night, I delivered the materials door to door. At that time, we were very short on materials, but we wanted to let more sentient beings know the truth. What should we do? We could not wait, so I bought fabric to make banners. Once I made one, I would hang it up and the result was always good.
To add different ways to clarify the truth, I bought colored chalk and when I noticed a good location on the street, I wrote something there. Whenever I left home, I always recited articles like "A Righteous God" and "Righteous Thoughts and Righteous Actions." After I recited them, I was no longer afraid. Then, I sent forth righteous thoughts continuously. I felt that my field was very clean. Every night I wrote many short messages that clarified the truth. With the protection of Teacher, it went smoothly and the messages I wrote were not removed for a long time.
The Awakening of Ordinary People Encouraged Me
In 2003, I went to distribute truth-clarification materials, including the disk "A Journey Through Wind and Rain." I went to a building and began to distribute them beginning on the top floor. While I was hanging them on a door, the owner opened the door. I sent out the thought, "You should do a good deed." I found that the owner was several years older than I. So I smiled peacefully and said, "Hello sir! I came to deliver the truth to you. Now, since you opened the door, I can hand the disk to you." I held the disk with both of my hands and presented it to him politely. He asked me, "What truth?" I said, "It is the truth about Falun Gong and you should watch it carefully." He said, "Do you know what kind of place this is? This is a residential building for policemen." I said, "No matter what kind of place this is, I just want to deliver the truth to you and let you know that Falun Gong is good. Jiang Zemin used the state media to poison people's minds." He said, "I am very sympathetic towards Falun Gong. I also know a lot about you. It is very hot today while you take the risk to deliver the materials. It is not easy. You should pay attention to your safety." I said, "Thank you sir for your caring words, thank you!" I continued to distribute the disks to other doors. He followed me and said, "You can distribute them without worry, I will protect you. Now you know my home. In the future, please send me more disks whenever there are new ones."
Soon after, the "Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party" were published, people were looking for them. Once, I distributed the Nine Commentaries starting on the first floor of a building. On the sixth floor (the top floor), I saw two people fixing something. I hesitated and wondered whether I should continue. I realized that they had a predestined relationship with me and Teacher. I would owe them if I just left. Alas, I was afraid and could not calm down. I asked myself, "Where are your righteous thoughts? The evil CCP does not want me to move forward because it is afraid of being disintegrated. How could I allow this?" I took two copies of the Nine Commentaries from my purse and continued to walk up. They heard the noise and looked down. They asked me, "What are you doing?" I walked toward them quickly and said, "I come to deliver the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party to you. Come, read the truth about the CCP, and how they fool people." One of them said, "No wonder I heard the noise! This is great! Give me a copy, I have been looking for this for days." I gave him two copies and asked him, "Would you please give the other copy to your neighbor?" He said yes. He was very delighted when he received the Nine Commentaries. I know that it was his awakened side feeling delighted.
Do not Wait or Depend on Others in your Cultivation
I really wanted to follow Teacher's instructions and I was also worried for sentient beings. However, when I went out to clarify the truth, I knew that Teacher had me meet with people with predestined relationships, and I could have persuaded them to quit the CCP, but I did not feel like talking when there were difficulties. For example, when I went to markets to clarify the truth, I always looked for a booth without business so that I would not interfere with their work. But once we started the conversation, customers would come continuously. Even sending forth righteous thoughts did not help. Thus I had to give up. I knew it was not right. I looked inside but could not find any attachment. I really did not know what went wrong.
Once I and another practitioner clarified the truth to a person selling peaches. She listened very carefully and agreed that Falun Dafa was good. During the conversation, she told me that she had joined the Communist Youth League. When I was getting ready to ask her to quit the CCP, people stopped by continuously to buy peaches. It was as if they had encountered some emergency. A big pile of peaches was gone within half an hour. The owners of other booths that also sold peaches felt very strange and they chatted about this.
The other practitioner and I stood behind the booth. I asked myself, "Why is it like this? It is such big interference towards the saving of this life." I was very sad. Although I did not know where we went wrong, I felt that there must be something wrong with me. No matter what, I could not give up again. Then I remembered what I learned during Fa study. During Fa-rectification, the old forces made careful arrangements. However, Teacher made even more careful arrangements. Teacher also used the arrangements of the old forces. I suddenly felt relieved. I can also follow Teacher and use the arrangements of the old forces to save sentient beings. The old forces just want to see me give up. Then I will not give up, I will dissolve all the demons that interfere and block this person from being saved.
After the lady sold all the peaches, I continued to talk with her. She said, "You are still here!" I told her, "We have been waiting for you, because it is not easy to save someone. We met because of our predestined relationship. If we left, we would miss you." She was very touched. I said, "Do you know why your business was so good?" She said that she did not know. I told her, "Both of us are Falun Dafa practitioners. We cultivate Truth-Compassion-Forbearance. We brought you the peace and compassion we obtained during cultivation. Because you accepted that Falun Dafa is good and recognized that Falun Dafa was good, your business did well." She kept thanking us. We let her thank Teacher. We helped each other clarify the truth to this lady in depth and she agreed to quit the CCP.
While writing this article, I suddenly realized what was wrong with me. Teacher said, "Good or evil comes from that instant thought. "(Zhuan Falun). My thought was not correct. It was right that I should not interfere with the business of sentient beings. But I should not restrict truth-clarification to those who had no business. The old forces want to destroy sentient beings, so while I clarified the truth, the dark minions, rotten demons and Communist evil specter came to interfere. The old forces wanted me to give up. I realized that the old forces and the evil specters could no longer affect me. I will completely dissolve them.
In writing this article, I found many problems within myself. I will correct them quickly. I will do the three things well and do better to save sentient beings.