(Clearwisdom.net) With this writing, I want to present my deepest gratitude to Master for His benevolent protection. Also, by writing this down, I want to let other practitioners know what happened to me.
On June 11, 2007 I came down with a high fever (as high as 40 degrees Celsius) that continued for 39 days. I lost my hearing, and my vision was also impaired. My whole body felt numb, and my legs were swollen. Below my knees appeared purple spots with hard cores, and a red line appeared on my left leg, running to my upper thigh. It was a test of life and death.
When I started practicing Falun Gong in 1995, Master purified my body - the body of a person who was always ill. Then, why did I develop such serious symptoms of illness a dozen years later? Lying half-awake, I saw evil immortals beating me so hard, as if they wanted to beat me to death. They verbally abused me at the same time, scolding me with unpleasant words and picking on things I was attached to. Their words made me suffer like a knife piercing my heart and bone. In the days before the fever, I thought a lot about making money, and with that thought I put my personal life first and put rescuing other lives second. The evil forces apparently used that thought to insult me.
They said, "Are you a Dafa practitioner? If you want to do ordinary things you should return the human body you have. Your body is marked 'offering all lives salvation.' Such a body is not for you to live an ordinary person's life. If you want to be an ordinary person we have to take your body back." [I imagine] this was the reason they beat me so hard. When these beings initially appeared, they showed themselves as golden bodies. As they beat me, their golden bodies became grayish and smaller, and the power of their blows diminished, and finally disappeared.
Facing their wicked theory I immediately pointed the truth out, "My human body is indeed for the purpose of rescuing lives, and my Master gives me permission to have it. For what reason should I give it to you? Even if I am attached to something, it is my decision what path I want to choose, and my Master is watching me. The principle of Dafa will let me see my insufficiencies, and I will not forget my mission. Anyone who wants to take my human body is the most evil life, wanting to cause damage to the Fa-rectification."
I saw the jealous mentality of the old forces. The historic tribulations they had arranged for humanity have changed because of the Fa-rectification. They have seen that the Fa-rectification will succeed, and they have seen that with the human body one can achieve great deeds during the Fa-rectification; they deeply regret their not having human bodies. They are envious of the monikers "Dafa disciples" and "Falun Gong practitioners" and they are envious of all the people in the world who have human bodies at this special time. They even resent evil people who have human bodies, those they themselves have designated. Their jealous mentality has gone to the extreme.
When I awoke I saw that my body had turned purple. I was numb all over except in my chest. I knew that the fever I had was not to eliminate karma; it was high-level elements of the old forces persecuting me.
When fellow practitioners learned of my fate they got together and sent righteous thoughts for me; some often came to see me. I felt I had slowed fellow practitioners down and asked them not to waste their time on me, but they told me, "We are one body, and when the old forces persecute you, they also persecute us. We cannot leave you helpless."
I had gone to Beijing on July 20, 1999 to resist the beginning days of the persecution. Since then, at every critical moment, Master's principle, "Grand talk counts for naught when it comes to life and death, Actions reveal what is true." ("The Knowing Heart" from Essentials for Further Advancement II) strengthens me and helps me pass tribulations. I developed a further understanding of the principle during my 39 day-long fever.
I knew that I had cultivated for more than ten years, and that at microscopic levels, my body has been transformed by my cultivation; that nothing and no one should move me. The fever could only hurt my superficial body; the uncultivated part. It could not hurt me fundamentally.
This tribulation let me see what I had truly gained through my cultivation. I knew Master was helping and protecting me, and that no one could really touch me. I felt excited and foolishly thought, "I have had enough of life in this world. It is too difficult to save people, and there are too many of them to save. It is good to leave this world, and I then do not have to worry about saving people anymore. No one would say anything about me if I take this opportunity and leave this world."
According to a genuine cultivator's standard, this thought was extremely selfish. Dafa practitioners are not ordinary cultivators. We are bestowed with the mission to offer living beings salvation, according to our vows. How could I even think of simply leaving the world without considering my mission? As a practitioner cultivating compassion I should arrive with compassion and leave with compassion. How could I arrive with compassion but wanting to leave this world quickly before a compassionate conclusion?
Was I lying to Master and to numerous divine beings? This is an irresponsible thought for Fa-rectification. There are only limited numbers of Falun Gong practitioners in the world, and there are massive numbers of living beings waiting to be saved. If every practitioner had this thought, then who would help Master save lives? This kind of thought - giving up halfway - is destructive, and not at all worthy of a Dafa practitioner. Many living entities want to have human bodies, but Master did not choose them. And here I am - I have a body, and I am a practitioner, but I want to give up half way. Was I still worthy of being Master's disciple? My righteous thoughts chose to stay in this world and to put a greater effort in eliminating all kinds of attachments.
My 39-day fever began June 11 and ended July 22, 2007, the same day Master publicly lectured in Washington, DC. Master said, "'7/20' is a date that has extraordinary significance for us; it may play an important role in the history that has yet to come." ("Fa Teaching at the U.S. Capital," 2007) I felt extremely fortunate. Several days later I was able to walk outside. My surprised neighbors said, "You have overcome this illness in only 40 days. You did not go to hospitals and did not take medicine; it is miraculous!" My friends said, "Falun Gong is powerful, and your Master is really powerful!" Seeing them recognize the beauty of Dafa made me feel great joy. I felt that the pain I had suffered was not in vain.
I suffered much during the 39-day-long tribulation, but gained much more. The gain was far beyond the amount of pain I suffered. I came to understand many principles of the Fa and felt that my wisdom had magnified. Many principles that were unclear to me before became suddenly clear to me.
I came to understand that as a cultivator in the past, one could achieve consummation if he could enlighten to only one principle of the Fa, but he may have had to suffer his whole life. He might even have had to endure hardships lifetime after life-time. We Dafa disciples have achieved so much in such a short period; extraordinarily grand consummation awaits us!
I also came to understand the deeper meaning of this comment, "Opportunity knocks but once." ("Practicing Cultivation After Retirement," Essentials for Further Advancement) "There are not many opportunities for something like this" (Zhuan Falun)
This small earth exists to help re-establish innumerable heavenly bodies. On this small grain of cosmic dust will occur the consummation of millions of Dafa disciples; they will achieve the salvation of billions of people and countless sentient beings. As for us, even a minor matter bears significant consequences, and every rumor the old forces fabricate targets the hearts of innumerable people. I understand that there is only one Fa-rectification in this universe, and there is only one opportunity for Dafa disciples to fulfill their mission. One's spontaneous thought can decide his fate. There are really not many chances left!
The fever left me renewed, as if shedding an old layer of skin while another grew.
I once again witnessed the miracles of Dafa. From now on, I will more diligently do what I am supposed to do to repay Master's grace.
Category: Improving Oneself
