(Clearwisdom.net) Greetings, Master!
Greetings, fellow practitioners!
I started cultivating in Dafa in 2002. As a new practitioner then, I did not have an in-depth understanding of the Fa concerning the saving of the sentient beings. Thus, I did not step out to do truth clarification to non-practitioners. I was afraid to face everyday people then because I knew they might scold, criticize and threaten me during truth clarification. I held on to this mindset for almost 1 year until one day I read Master's "Fa Rectification Period Dafa Disciples" in <Essentials for Further Advancement II> that I finally woke up. Master said,
"A Dafa disciple who fails to achieve the effect of safeguarding and upholding Dafa has no way of reaching Consummation, because your cultivation is different from that of the past and the future."
Only then did I realize that I did not meet the Fa's requirements at all. Instead of diligently clarifying the truth to save sentient beings, I was finding ways to protect myself. I saw how selfish my heart was -- a heart that only wanted to benefit from Dafa, yet not willing to safeguard and uphold Dafa during critical moments.
Armed with a folder containing many pictures demonstrating the goodness of Dafa, photos of our fellow practitioners persecuted to death in China and other truth clarifying materials, I started to do one-to-one truth clarifications then by going to the streets to meet people, at popular sites, and door-to-door truth clarification, an acceptable method in Singapore. For door-to-door truth clarification, we will knock on every door to explain to people the goodness of Dafa and the truth about the CCP's persecution against us.
Over the years, the more I do door-to-door truth clarification, the more I have realized the importance of clarifying the truth to people face to face. At times, we have encountered people who might have read or seen our truth clarification materials, but have unanswered doubts in their minds. In a face to face situation, it's different. For whatever doubts they have, whatever questions they had, we can answer them on the spot.
Of course, doing truth clarification door-to-door is not an isolated method that we concentrate on; we also did mass distribution of truth clarification materials to different residential areas in Singapore. While promoting the Fa, we also distributed materials and clarified the truth to people walking past our practice site. At times we would go to crowded streets to talk to people one-on-one.
I have learned from experience that being alert to whatever random thoughts that come to my mind is very important. If I am not careful, I can be easily misled by them, thinking that they are my very thoughts. Many times, these thoughts came without a hint, and especially during critical moments. They came in many forms, sometimes as lustful, negative, or suggestive thoughts that try to lure me away from doing Dafa work. There were some occasions that I did not do well in this aspect. But whenever I realize my mistakes, it is always the case of my personal attachments that gave those bad thoughts the opportunity to burrow into my loopholes.
There was once I was planning for a Fa-promotion activity late at night. At one point, I was having difficulties sorting out the details, just then a thought surfaced in my mind, "It's late. It's time to sleep." As I was not really tired, I did not bother with that thought. So I continued with the work on hand. After a while, the thought came again, "It's time to rest. If not, you will have no energy to work tomorrow." This time, I stopped. I thought that I could take a short nap and work on it later. So I headed for my bed. I didn't wake up until the next morning.
At first, I thought it was due to my long working hours that caused this fatigue. So, I did not suspect anything. But soon these thoughts kept coming back. They came not just during the late nights, but at anytime during the day, during my off days, and when I was about to do or in the midst of doing Dafa work. I became very sleepy whenever these thoughts appeared and I struggled to stay awake. At other times, thoughts like "do it later" and "let's do something else" will emerge. Many times I was not careful, I gave in. As a result, many coordination efforts were delayed.
There were also times when I suddenly have thoughts like "watch TV", "surf the net", or "read that book." Sometimes, they came in other form like "you need these resources for self development." When I was not alert and steadfast, I would conform to those thoughts. Before I knew it, I had wasted many hours in those activities, and nothing constructive was done. And worse, those foreign messages from the TV, websites and books interfered with me. They came as images or voices and distracted me when I send forth righteous thoughts. When I study the Fa, they will appear in my head to disturb my reading. They can even affect me while I was clarifying the truth.
One day, many people were initially negative towards us. They posed many questions like, "Why are you people playing politics?" "There must be some black sheep among your group." "If Falun Gong is so good, why would the CCP want to persecute your group?" and so on. For every one of them, I waited for them to finish talking, at the same time quickly sending forth righteous thoughts to eliminate the negative factors controlling their minds. When they were done, I clarified the truth to them. I answered many of their questions one at a time, elaborating in detail, and injecting positive information about Dafa to them. As each of their doubts was answered, I saw their faces brightened up, and their fierce expressions gradually disappeared. They became receptive and started asking about the benefits of practicing Dafa. One of them even said, "Now, I finally understand! I will definitely read your materials and pass them to my friends to read too." At that instant, I felt really happy for them, as I knew these lives have been saved.
This positive result of personal, one-to-one interaction continued from one floor of the building to another. For each of them, I spent a considerable amount of time explaining. Because of the constant talking, I became tired after a while. There were still a few more floors to complete yet, instead of rightfully arresting the sudden negative thoughts that popped up in my mind, "Better do things faster. It's getting late," I decided to quicken my pace and explain the truth very briefly to the remaining people even though some still had doubts. Soon, most of the doors no longer opened for me. Some doors were opened, but nobody came forward when I pressed the bell. Worst, some residents were in, but when I called out to them, they just ignored me. Some even said that they were not interested at all. I was kind of shocked to see such a drastic, sudden change in the responses. I grew anxious. So I tried using whatever opening speech I could think of to catch their attention, but it did not work. I tried sending forth righteous thoughts, but still it did not work. This went on until the last unit. By then, I was very disturbed. I searched hard within myself on where I had gone wrong.
I enlightened to principles that Master taught in "Fa Teaching Given to Australian Practitioners" on August 4, 2007. All the beings in this cosmos have both good and evil factors. Whichever factor that you conform to, that factor will automatically play a role in your body. So when your righteous thoughts aren't strong and you don't control your own thoughts, then those bad things will control you, they will immediately play a role in your mind and you will think that you are doing it.
Yes. First of all, when those thoughts first appeared, I did not steadfastly use the Fa to handle them. I did not question if they were righteous ones or not. Instead, I had slackened in my main consciousness and mistakenly treated them as my own thinking.
Secondly, I realized that I had some latent attachments, and these thoughts had come directly targeting on them. I had already conformed to the negative factors of this cosmos unknowingly in the first place.
I found myself seeking comfort. Not in the sense of not doing Dafa work or stepping out to do truth clarification, but in avoiding and procrastinating Dafa work that I found challenging, unfamiliar, complex or difficult to handle. Whenever the tasks on hands were difficult or required more in-depth thinking, I would find myself backing off mentally. And the root of this attachment is because I was afraid to face hardship and taking on more responsibility. It was because this will mean I had to take on more, on top of what I was currently doing, and face the complexities of fellow practitioners' human hearts when doing coordination work. Due to this fear in me, I was easily swayed by messages that allowed me to ease my pressure. As in the case of door to door truth clarification, because I conformed to the thoughts of seeking comfort, I was stopped. When I was clarifying the truth to the remaining people, deep in my heart I was hoping to finish that block quickly, so that I could leave on time and rest earlier. For my own comfort, I took short cuts in truth clarification, and my brief answers did not resolve their doubts in Dafa. To put it plainly, I was just going through the motions. I had put my own interests first and was saving the sentient beings second.
Also, in the course of doing Dafa work, I had developed a strong attachment of pursuing capabilities. It all started when I saw my limitations in contributing to Dafa work. Many Dafa projects, other than having strong righteous thoughts, require a certain level of experience, expertise and working knowledge in order to do well. So, I began to surf the Internet more and read self improvement books that I believed could enhance my abilities. But during the process of reading these books, I realized that not only had I slackened in my Fa study, but my thinking started to conform to that of everyday people. This gradually became a strong attachment. It was no longer the pure heart of wanting to learn things and contribute in Dafa work, but more like satisfying my desire for knowledge and experience.
As I analyzed myself further, I saw that I was in a state of seeking outwardly for quick tips, short cuts and ready-made answers so that I could quickly get on to work. I have come to realize that no matter how much we do outwardly, a clear mind, a pure heart and a solemn attitude towards cultivation are most important. To my understanding, these are the deciding factors that determine the outcome of my cultivation and what I am doing. In other dimensions, the old forces, dark minions and evil beings were just lurking out there waiting for a chance to destroy us, to sabotage our plans. If we are not careful, they will infiltrate into our minds and lead us astray. It is our responsibility to rationally take charge of ourselves and our thoughts. I learned that I have to be very clear on my thinking and intentions at all times, and the only way is to diligently study the Fa daily. Now, whatever random thoughts that surface in my mind, I would quickly arrest them and use the Fa to evaluate it. If they are negative thoughts, I will reject them immediately. At the same time, I will look into my heart for whichever latent attachment that I may have, and rectify myself immediately. I will leave no stone unturned because if I am not steadfast in this, I will be actually allowing these bad elements to manifest in my body. As Fa- rectification progresses, time accelerates faster and thus, the day becomes shorter, so I will always remind myself not to be muddle-headed in this aspect again.
Thank you, Master!
Thank you, fellow practitioners!
From the 2009 Singapore Falun Dafa Cultivation Experience Sharing Conference (September 21, 2009)
