Falun Dafa Minghui.org www.minghui.org PRINT

How Falun Dafa Helps Me to Harmonize Family Relationships

July 22, 2009

(Clearwisdom.net) I often hear fellow practitioners tell me how stubborn their family members are and how they were deeply poisoned by the lies of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). In fact, to have this notion is, in itself, wrong. The longer we hold this notion in our mind, the greater the impact it can have on our family, which in turn can unwittingly create difficulties for a person in learning the truth about Falun Dafa.

Through Fa study I enlightened to this point: When we have a conflict with someone in the family that does not cultivate Falun Dafa, it must be that we are not doing things in accordance with the Fa or that it is time that we look inward and elevate our xinxing level.

When I first started cultivation, I always felt that my husband and I were very close, so I seldom shared my thoughts with him. I just studied the Fa and did the exercises rather than share the beauty and magnificence of Falun Dafa with him. This, in fact, revealed my selfishness. Since I did not do well to harmonize our relationship, for some time he did not return home in the evenings and we often fought a lot. One time when he came home from work and saw our daughter reading a truth-clarification booklet that I had brought home, he stared at her and demanded, "Who gave this to you to read?" He repeated this several times. He then said to me, "Don't give her your Falun Dafa materials to read. It will cut into her time to do homework." How could reading Dafa materials affect schoolwork? Wasn't this because I did not tell him about the beauty and supernormal ability of Falun Dafa and that Falun Dafa can enlighten a person and bring wisdom?

After repositioning my state-of-mind, I thought, "I should give my closest family members the opportunity to obtain the Fa and be saved." Whenever I studied the Fa and came across a paragraph that could provide guidance to an ordinary person or show something that could not be learned from ordinary books or a statement that would arouse curiosity, I would show it to my husband. At first he said, "Take it away--I'm not reading that!" So I would read it out aloud to him. After I read it I would say, "One day you would regret not reading it. If I did not tell you about this, it would be negligence on my part." No matter how distasteful his words were, my heart was not affected and I maintained a peaceful state of mind.

One day when we went for a walk, we saw an old man in a wheelchair. I said to my husband, "You see, human life is just so pitiful. Birth, aging, sickness, and death--the reincarnation process--is just so painful. No matter how much money he has now, he can't feel happy at all. Am I right? If a person with a physical body can cultivate in a righteous way, then he can have a healthy body and have no more reincarnations. That way he will be truly fortunate."

I felt that what I said did not contain any personal notions, and my husband did not say a word for a long time. It seemed that he was moved. Later, whenever I saw such people again, I would talk to my husband from different perspectives, "When you think about it, a person really does not have three good days in a row. There are things going on at home, in society, or at work, and people always want to fight and compete. When he gets old, all his illnesses will surface. It is all caused by our own attachments. You see, it is such a good thing to cultivate. You let everything run its own course. If something naturally belongs to you, then you will never lose it So then your heart can become calm and you will become healthy."

When I first started to send forth righteous thoughts, I found that I had an attachment to food. I would prepare lunch before noon and set the table. Then I would send righteous thoughts. When I came back to the table afterwards, the dishes would be empty, with only some cold soup left. I thought that my husband did this on purpose. I would then finish off the leftovers, and that would be my lunch. Sometimes, I saw the hot dishes on the table and wanted to sit down and eat. Then I would think, "If I missed sending righteous thoughts because I was eating a meal, it would be such a great loss! I should eliminate my attachment to food."

Without the attachment to self, I felt that my power when sending righteous thoughts became greater, and I wouldn't get absentminded, either. My husband was moved by actions and later started to leave some food for me and cover it to keep it warm.

I used to be so selfish, but now I have become selfless during my cultivation of Falun Dafa, and this righteous field has helped to correct the wrong states of the people around me. Falun Dafa has reconstructed me!

I think that the one thing that ordinary people fear most is sickness. When an ordinary person has a peaceful state of mind, or when the person is sick, he is most accepting to Dafa's teachings. When tribulations occur in our house, it can help us validate Dafa. The difference is whether we position ourselves as ordinary people or as Dafa disciples.

Now my entire family cultivates Falun Dafa. It was Dafa that corrected all incorrect states around me.