(Clearwisdom.net) How do we treat practitioners who are in the midst of tribulations? With the progress of Fa-rectification, it looks like we are all clear about this issue. When fellow practitioners are being persecuted, we send forth righteous thoughts to help rescue them; when they have serious sickness karma, we send forth righteous thoughts. There are many such successful examples. However, I feel that we still have misconceptions at different levels. There are serious issues with regard to our standpoint.
Each and every one of us who has come this far has their merits and great acts. Yet we are still human, and even though we are cultivators, before we consummate, we will still have human mentalities and shortcomings. In the harsh environment in China, when fellow practitioners are faced with tribulations, our first thoughts about them are critical.
However, over the years, we seem to have developed a pattern of thinking. Even though, we say that we don't acknowledge the old force arrangements, as soon as we find out that a practitioner has been arrested or suffers from sickness karma, our first thought is that he/she has loopholes and is being taken advantage of by the old forces. We tell everybody to send forth righteous thoughts and at the same time try to look for the shortcomings of the practitioner in question, with magnifying glasses. However, too often, it seems that the problem remains unresolved. Practitioners tend not to bad mouth each other, realizing that this would not be in accordance with the Fa. Yet we analyze what happened and share amongst each other. Isn't this the same approach taken as that by the old forces? Doesn't this reinforce the reasons why the old forces persecute us? Doesn't it also increase the division between practitioners? So how could our righteous thoughts based on this situation be effective?
For a long time, I have vaguely felt that this was not right, but I do not have a clear understanding on this. I am a manager in my job and have what people think are strong organizational skills. After I started my cultivation, I used these skills to manage and coordinate fellow practitioners in materials production and distribution. Materials involved included, for example, the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party and VCDs of Shen Yun shows. I applied the same skills to persuading people to withdraw from the CCP and its affiliations. I had done quite well. Although I had some close calls when people refused to take the information and threatened to report me to the police, I escaped narrowly.
Over time, I came to regard "doing things in a grand way" as cultivation. I could not study the Fa with a calm mind, and treated it as simply part of my daily routine. With such smooth sailing in truth clarification, my show-off mentality, feeling of superiority and zealous attitude expanded. Although I looked inward, I got carried away with doing things before I found my attachments. In the end, someone reported me to the police and I was arrested and sent to a brainwashing center. I went astray and did something that a practitioner should not have done, I believe due to the fact that I had not been studying the Fa well, and my attachments to sentimentality and fear of persecution.
After I was released, with more Fa study, I realized that I had been wrong, but I couldn't get out of the box of my astray thinking. I wanted to get in touch with other practitioners, but I could feel that they were badmouthing me behind my back. Some of their complaints even found their way to me through non-practitioners. That's all the more reason why I didn't want to get in touch with them. Something was separating me and them.
However, practitioner A, whom I had known for more than ten years, kept emailing me even though she was on a business trip out of town. I could feel her compassion. After she heard that I had gone astray, she said to other practitioners, "I am sure she will come back. I don't care how she is now, all I remember is that she once climbed up onto a big chimney in the middle of the night and wrote "Falun Dafa is good," talking to people about the truth of Falun Gong and persuading people to quit the CCP. I am sure she will come back." After she returned from her trip, she came to see me whenever she had time. She talked about how she passed her own xinxing tests and how she looked for her own attachments. Although she did not talk about me, but I could see myself in what she said. When I was with her, I could feel the energy of compassion. I quickly understood, and I started to study the Fa more and really look at myself and send forth righteous thoughts. I was ashamed of myself. I could not stop crying. It was sometimes very painful. I sent forth righteous thoughts to get rid of the attachments I found. I finally walked out of the arrangements of the old forces and came back to Dafa (I have submitted my solemn announcement). I am very thankful for fellow practitioners' compassion. I can not express my thanks for Teacher's merciful salvation. I can only be more diligent.
As a result, I also asked myself if I being compassionate towards other practitioners in tribulations. The answer was no. I had been looking at them the same way the old forces do. Also, I had expected that other practitioners meet the requirements I had enlightened to and judged them based on that. That was unkind. Back in 2002, when the evil beings were very rampant, many production sites were destroyed. Practitioner B, who had been arrested for going to Beijing to appeal for Falun Gong and was "transformed" in a forced labor camp, continued to produce information materials. When the site was exposed, he left town and no one heard from him until one day he called my office, telling me that he was doing some labor in a rural area, with no pay, but his meals were provided. He had no practitioners around him and no Dafa books. He felt very isolated and almost forgot about cultivation. I read teacher's articles to him on the phone and updated him on our local situation and encouraged him to continue to practice. Later, I sent him some money and found a place for him to live, so that he could come back. After he moved in, he broke the house key and the landlord sent him back to me. My husband refused to let him stay in our place, as he was a shabby laborer. So I took him to an empty room, where he studied the Fa every day and I sent him meals every day and shared with him. Later on, we also helped him to find a job and a place to live.
It seemed as though I was compassionate and had helped him a lot, but my starting point was not true kindness. While I was helping him, I was not pleased with his cultivation state. I felt that he had too many fears and he brought interference wherever he went. Many of the local practitioners felt the same. We complained about him as we helped him. Once, while B was arguing with another practitioner, he said, "I am not doing well because you guys complain about me behind my back." When I heard this, I thought that he was right. If we as cultivators speak with impure hearts and from the wrong perspectives, we may be interfering with others as we try to help them. Because we have energy, whatever we think about is energy. If our thoughts are not on the Fa, they will have a negative impact.
Practitioner C had worked with me very well for years. If I called her to distribute materials, she went with me rain or shine. Then she experienced sickness karma. She had back pain and could not get up. After we sent forth righteous thoughts together, she got better and was able to do the exercises. But then she traveled around while she went on a business trip. When she came back after two weeks, she got sicker. It didn't stabilize even though we continued to send forth righteous thoughts. So she started to follow western medicine and Chinese medicine. In the end, she was hospitalized and lost control of her bladder and bowels. But only Dafa can save her and when she realized this she started to listen to the MP3 player we had sent her. We cooked for her, brought her meals and recited the Fa with her. In the end, she agreed to check out of the hospital, with the catheter still in. Three days later she pulled it out and her bladder and bowel movements were back to normal.
Despite this, her other symptoms still remained. We were all anxious. Every day we asked her to look inward, which she did, but never felt she found the real attachments. We continued to try to help her based on our own understandings, which I believe she found hard to accept. In the end, she died. Her children (non-practitioners) visited me to express their appreciation for my help. They said only Falun Dafa practitioners can be so kind and selfless. We felt that we had done all we could. It was because C couldn't let go of the issue of life and death that she had died. We were helpless.
Looking back, we were not completely in the Fa. When we learned that C was very "sick", we started to look for her shortcomings. She was retired, but didn't spend all her time for Dafa. She joined a choir and a dance group and she was writing a book, etc. She spent too much time traveling for fun. We never had anything positive to say about her. We forced our own understanding on her, which was not what she enlightened to. Although she passed away for a reason, the fact that we could not help her from the Fa's point of view, with compassion, is regrettable.
A few days later, another practitioner was reported to the police by a former practitioner. She was taken to a brainwashing center. When we heard about this, we asked each other to send forth righteous thoughts. We also complained about her a lot, even though she had been doing the three things well.
Another practitioner was having sickness karma and her family took her to the hospital. She received treatments for 20 days and was skin and bones by the time she was discharged. Fellow practitioners went to visit her and send righteous thoughts, but also complained about how she was disrespectful to others and had a lot of fear. We believed that she could not let go of the issue of life and death or that she had not been studying the Fa well. In fact, she had done a lot in the past decade in truth clarification.
I think it's about time we change. When fellow practitioners are faced with tribulations, our first thoughts are very important. We should never think about what they did not do well. (They will not be able to improve unless they realize their own mistakes). We have to see the positive side, remembering that they are Teacher's disciples and that the old forces are not fit to test them. Only then will our righteous thoughts be effective and the power of compassion do its work. The fact that we have fellow practitioners around us being persecuted constantly is not accidental, and it has to do with our own cultivation. We should all try to reflect on that.
As I write this, the faces of fellow practitioners appear in my mind one after another. They have each done something extraordinary and commendable. One is a manager at her job and she is very sharp and quick at picking on other practitioners (she has changed now). I did not like her. But then I thought about how diligent she was in truth clarification work. Once she was having a high fever and had to drive several kilometers, but still met with us to distribute materials. Teacher said it is a predestined relationship that we can be together during the Fa-rectification.
"Predestined ties of countless lifetimes, Each has Dafa as its guiding thread." ("The Difficult Path to Godhood" from Hong Yin II)
We should cherish our relationships. All conflicts happen for our cultivation. As long as we let go of human mentalities and do not focus on others' shortcomings, there will be no divisions between us. We will be a one body that cannot be destroyed.
Written on December 21, 2009