(Clearwisdom.net) Shortly after I began practicing Falun Gong in early 1999, the Chinese Communist regime began the massive persecution. Over the years, under Master's compassionate care, I have stumbled, but constant Fa-study has helped me to profoundly comprehend the preciousness of Dafa.
In Explaining the Content of Falun Dafa, Master said,
“What’s the situation of their Fa-study now? They sit down and start to study, and they don’t need the book—one person recites the book by memory from the beginning, then he stops and another person continues to recite, without making a mistake, and not one single word is recited wrong as they continue to recite. Then it continues, you recite a paragraph, he recites a paragraph, and people go on reciting like this.”
Because of these words I was willing to learn to recite the Fa. When reciting the Fa for the first time I stopped at Lecture Seven due to my work schedule. The second time, when I got to Lecture Three, I suffered from severe illness karma. The sharp pain in my right leg lasted four days straight, and I had to stop again. The interference came again and again. In the end I gave up trying to recite the Fa.
The turning point came in 2009. Probably with Master's arrangement, a practitioner who had been reciting the Fa for a long time discussed this with me. Hearing my story, she said, “Without strong determination, one can easily give up reciting the Fa. With strong determination, Master will help you, and you will be able to do it.” Her words touched me, and I began to recite the Fa once again, reciting several paragraphs daily. Sometimes, as soon as I picked up the book and began to recite the Fa I heard music coming from outside. My thoughts crept in, “How about putting the book down and watching TV for a while?” This interference lasted several days. I tried to negate it with strong perseverance. After several days the interference disappeared, and I also did better in reciting the Fa.
There was other interference during the process of reciting the Fa. In April 2010, my husband returned from his work and said, “If someone from the Notary Public comes and asks you about something, you can tell them that you know nothing about it.” I asked him what happened, but he would not tell me. I asked further, and he told me the details.
His place of business had an outstanding business loan of millions of yuan, and with recent financial losses, the company was having difficulty repaying it. My husband was in charge of finance, and he had signed the business loan agreements. He said he could be arrested and our home auctioned off to repay the loan.
I was shocked. Because of the vicious persecution, my income for the past years had been minimal, and I mainly relied on my husband. Nonetheless, by maintaining the mindset of a practitioner—peace and compassion—I kept reciting the Fa and doing the things I was supposed to do. Instead of complaining to my husband, I asked him to recite, “Falun Dafa is good,” and “Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good.”
During the following two months, there were many tests. The Notary Public sent personnel to inspect our home. I kept reciting the Fa and was not disturbed by these superficial phenomena. The situation improved day by day. Officials at my husband’s workplace said the company would take on the responsibility instead of blaming the individuals who were involved. Later, a government audit showed that both the business operations and the loss were well documented. In the end, no one was adversely affected.
This process didn't affect my reciting the Fa. Sometimes I was able to memorize a paragraph in five minutes, and this process went quicker and quicker. As time went on, I understood more of the Fa and also became more interested in reciting the Fa. It helped me to eliminate different attachments and do the three things better. Being consistent about reciting the Fa resolved many problems between practitioners.
I have coordinated many truth-clarification projects, but as time went on, my show-off mentality surfaced and became stronger and stronger. One day, the obstacles between myself and another practitioner in the same Fa-study group became so severe that he was no longer willing to provide a place for the group Fa-study. I felt bad when I heard his harsh words. Thinking we might lose our place for Fa-study, I could not eat or sleep well. I was absentminded and couldn't concentrate on reciting the Fa. Sometimes I thought, “I have done so much coordination work and even hardly had time for a meal. How could you treat me like that?” With these bad feelings, I had difficult time reciting the Fa, so I reminded myself not to be disturbed.
One day when reciting the Fa I read these two paragraphs:
“Nevertheless, there may be another person in the same working group or sharing the same office with him who is quite incapable of doing anything or is good for nothing. Yet one day this incompetent person gets a promotion instead of him and even becomes his supervisor. He will feel in his heart that it is unfair and complain to his boss and coworkers, feeling very upset and quite jealous.” (Zhuan Falun)
This Fa made me realize my error, thinking that I had done many things to validate the Fa while fellow practitioners had done few. Instead of respecting them, I looked at them with a jealous mindset and complained. Looking within helped me discover my jealousy and show-off mindset, and Master helped me remove them. I had an open and sincere discussion with the practitioner, and we began working well again with each other soon after.
The above are some of my personal experiences. Please point anything inappropriate.
Category: Improving Oneself
