(Clearwisdom.net) I am a practitioner who obtained the Fa in 1998, and I have cultivated over these years, through many ups and downs. I'd now like to share my cultivation practice experience with everyone. Since I am not literate, I have to have a fellow practitioner compile my narrative for me.
I believed in divine beings before 1998. But two months after my husband died in a car accident, my elder son died at a young age. After that, I believed in nothing but fate.
Obtaining the Fa
In August 1998, because of an acquaintance's recommendation, I went to a Falun Gong experience sharing conference. At the conference, they played Master's lectures daily. After I had listened for several days, I felt sick. At that time, I did not understand that it was Master cleansing my body. I went home without listening to all of the lectures.
At the end of the year, my physical exam showed that I had problems in every index number, and none were good. I asked an acquaintance to buy some medicine at retail price. The result was that he also urged me to practice Falun Gong. So I went to a practice site the next day.
Two or three months later, there was a Fa conference, and we did exercises early in the morning. I was using two crutches as a result of a car accident. While doing the exercises, I felt that a Falun was cleansing my body in my injured area. The next day, I could catch up with fellow practitioners while walking. Since that day, no matter how busy I was, or how bad the weather, I never skipped exercises or helping to spread the Fa with fellow practitioners.
Righteous Thoughts
The persecution of Falun Dafa practitioners began in 1999. Once, my son and I traveled to Yunnan. He did not allow me to do the exercises. After he fell asleep at night, I sent righteous thoughts and sensed a shadow of a person who specifically came to interfere with me. My righteous thoughts were very strong. The shadow might have been an evil being interfering with me. I had a dream. In the dream the room which I shared with my grandson was full of big maggots, very big ones, and they were everywhere. During those days, the environment was full of danger and evil beings, but I was determined to cultivate. Afterward, I could sense in advance the publishing of Master's new scriptures before I obtained them.
In the summer of 2000, I was arrested and taken to a detention center for protesting the persecution in the capital of my province. I shouted “Falun Dafa is good,” and spoke the facts of Falun Dafa and my own experience. I did not cooperate during the interrogations. I sent forth righteous thoughts daily, then felt the field becoming more righteous. The persecution became less severe.
Around 2000, I developed stroke symptoms, including heart discomfort, headache, and retching. My daughter urged me to take a medical exam. The results indicated that I had many diseases. My daughter wanted to get prescriptions. I said no. I thought that I had Master and the Fa, that this was a false image, and I wouldn't accept it. I recited Master's scriptures that I could remember and got help from fellow practitioners, who strengthened my righteous thoughts. As a result, I was back to normal in two days.
In 2009, I visited a fellow practitioner who lived in the countryside and was suffering from a tribulation of sickness karma. I had difficulty urinating, and my situation was getting worse after the trip. I was not able to control my urine. Sometimes it was retained, sometimes it was frequent, and the urine was cloudy and milky. At the same time, my legs were in such pain that I couldn't walk. I thought that I should have righteous thoughts, read the Fa more and recite the Fa more. Master said,
“The Fa can break all attachments, the Fa can destroy all evil, the Fa can shatter all lies, and the Fa can strengthen righteous thoughts.” (“Drive Out Interference” from Essentials for Further Advancement II)
The problem disappeared in three and a half days.
Set Aside Attachment to Emotions
Trials of xinxing are much harder than those that affect the body. My son and daughter-in-law once were heading towards divorce. Because my husband and elder son had already passed away, I had to handle everything myself. This was targeting my attachments. I took my daughter-in-law to a bus station. I thought that I should not let my mind be disturbed. I also asked my son if his mind was disturbed. He said no. On the third day when they were supposed to sign divorce documents, her aunt called for a reconciliation. My son did not go, but I went there. The aunt asked, “If she were your daughter, what would you do?” I told her the facts and talked about how to handle the mother and daughter-in-law relationship from the view of a cultivator. The aunt said, “Oh, I could not do that way. You did well and right.” The fight stopped.
Later, on another occasion, I got a call from my son. He said desperately, “Mom, come to bury me.” I thought it came again to have me set aside my attachments because I only had this son left. I sent righteous thoughts on my way to his home, “No one can manage me except Master.” My son lay down on his bed after I changed his mind with a couple of words. I reasoned with him using the principles of the Fa and told him that he would find the seas and the skies boundless when he took a step back in the conflict with his wife. He later thought it through and reconciled with his wife.
When I had just moved to the city where my son and daughter lived, both of them had their own houses. But, instead of letting me move in, they asked me to rent my own apartment because of my practicing Falun Gong. I was really sad. I knew they were usually filial and this was targeting my attachments. But I still felt uneasy about it. I told myself that I must set aside the attachment to affection. My daughter even said that this house was my son's and that one was my daughter's. Where was mine? It was really hard to set it aside. I finally set aside the attachment through studying the Fa. When I passed the xinxing trials well, I easily went through the 2 hours meditation and my level had obviously improved.
Since my righteous thoughts were strong, although I am illiterate, fellow practitioners liked to talk to me. I told them that they had to use righteous thoughts, not human thoughts. A practitioner could not pass a trial involving her daughter and son-in-law. I told her those things were targeting our attachments. We should set aside our attachments even though we thought it was impossible. If she could treat her son-in-law as her daughter, she would pass. Another practitioner suspected her husband of having an affair. I directly told her that she was discrediting herself, and throwing bad things and unrighteous thoughts into her husband's field. Even an ordinary person wouldn't discredit his or her own family. After she improved her xinxing, she passed the trial.
Once after I openly distributed truth-clarification materials in the street, a fellow practitioner said that there were surveillance cameras in the street. My mind was disturbed and I became scared. I burned incense to Master. The incense was flat. I knew my attachment to fear was being targeted. It happened to be at the same time of our area changing citizen identification cards. My son said that I had to take a picture at the police station. I connected it to the possibility that the surveillance cameras might have taken my pictures. I thought that I was getting trouble but I could not say it to my children. My attachment was very strong. I started to send righteous thoughts and felt that my righteous thoughts were getting stronger and stronger. When I arrived at the police station, I felt that my righteous thoughts were very strong and thought they would not be able to take any pictures. The officers indeed tried three times but failed, saying my white hair reflected light. I later set aside my attachments. Several months later, I went to the police station again. They took my picture successfully in one shot.
Clarifying the Truth Face to Face
Once, I wanted to clarify the truth about Falun Dafa in a public square. I sent righteous thoughts and Master arranged people with predestined relationships to come to me. An older couple sat on the stone bench in front of me. Once they heard my words, they agreed to quit the Chinese Communist Party and its affiliated organizations, though I cannot even remember what I said. On several other occasions, when people handed me advertisement papers, I said that I was illiterate, but since they handed me this paper for my benefit, I would tell them something that was for their benefit. Then I talked about quitting the CCP. Some people did not quit. I told them to remember “Falun Dafa is good” and quit when they had another chance later. In the beginning, I became anxious when people did not quit the Party. Now, my xinxing is improved, and I do not feel uneasy any more. In the beginning, I dared not distribute Shen Yun DVDs face to face. I was no longer afraid after some time.
I often say to the practitioners who experience interference in doing the three things because of their physical conditions, “Do not recognize even a little of any of this kind of persecution. Eliminate them with righteous thoughts when they are just about to start. If I cannot eliminate it, the righteous gods behind the scenes will eliminate it. In addition, we have Master's help.” The practitioners said that I said that with full confidence and strong power.
Master said,
“When you conduct yourselves righteously Master can do anything for you. If your righteous thoughts are truly strong, if you're able to put aside the thought of life and death, and if you're solid and unshakable like diamond, then those evil beings won't dare to touch you, because they know that other than killing you any type of persecution will be useless. The evil will have no choice but to leave you alone. If in this scenario the evil still persecutes you, then Master will show no leniency. Master has countless Law Bodies, and on top of this, there are countless righteous Gods helping me do things, and they will directly eliminate the evil, too. Didn't I tell you before that each of you Dafa disciples has eight types of Heavenly Law-Guardians protecting you? It's all because you haven't done well enough that all these Gods are being restrained by the old cosmos's Fa-principles and can't do anything, despite their really wanting to help.” (“Touring North America to Teach the Fa”)
I know that I still have many human attachments, such as impetuosity. But nothing will hinder us if we look within, eliminate human attachments, and strengthen righteous thoughts.
These are my personal understandings. Please point out any mistakes.
