(Minghui.org)
Greetings, Master!
Greetings, fellow practitioners!
With Difficulty, I Obtained Dafa
Fortunately, I began cultivating in Dafa in 2007. Yet back in 1994, someone mailed me a copy of Falun Gong. After reading it, I went to a practice site. Most practitioners had just finished the exercises and had left. Two practitioners were still there sharing experiences. One of them turned around and looked at me kindly, and this made me feel dizzy. I realized this qigong was truly powerful. Even though I had begun the path of searching for the Fa, superficially I was against qigong because I had experienced some bad things with a fake qigong and I was still attached to another religion. At that time I missed the opportunity to begin cultivation in Dafa. But Teacher did not give up on me as in 1999, the year that the CCP began to unlawfully persecute Falun Dafa, an unpleasant event in my life isolated me from the outside world. I didn’t hear any of the CCPs’ slanderous propaganda. In this way I was protected from all the lies, and the following year I came to the United States.
After coming to the States, I made up my mind to join a Chinese spiritual group. I was vaguely aware that this group would be Buddhism or Qigong. My husband accompanied me to many places, including temples, Qigong groups, charity organizations, self acclaimed cultivation organizations, as well as many bookstores. A few years had passed and I was still searching for the truth.
I did encounter Falun Gong once again during this period. I did not become involved while Dafa was first being persecuted. One of my friends inadvertently quoted a slander by the CCP. Because of this casual conversation, I mistakenly labeled Falun Gong a political organization when I saw the practitioners’ in the Independence Parade. When the Falun Gong group marched pass me, I avoided eye contact with a smiling female practitioner. Another time an elderly male practitioner tried to give me a flyer when I walked by a Falun Gong booth. I quickly rejected it, although I felt he was very compassionate.
From a very young age, I knew I was here for cultivation. I tried many different methods, but none felt right for me. I gradually began to focus my attention on daily life, feeling perhaps life was just this way. The desire to pursue the true meaning of life had slowly faded sway. But the knowing side of me was in deep despair. I often woke up in tears, sometimes crying and almost out of breath. I could not understand why I was so sad, and unconsciously felt it was a different me who cried in despair. I often dreamed of many low level sprits.
One year, my child’s ear became infected. His illness was unstable and lasted for almost a year. This reminded me of cultivation once again and I began searching for cultivation articles on The Epoch Times website for a few months but strangely found nothing. In hindsight I can see that the interference from the other dimensions was incredibly severe. It indeed was not easy for one to obtain the Fa. I had no other option but to remain in my old religion.
In 2007, Master Li Hongzhi published the article “Disintegrate Completely All the Meddling Deities in the Three Realms that Have a Hand in Interfering with Fa-Rectification.” Master cleared away all the evil old forces that controlled religions and prevented sentient beings from being saved. I suddenly had a strong and clear wish. I went onto The Epoch Times website again, and quickly found a cultivation-related article connecting me to the main Falun Dafa website – Minghui.org, and in this way, I finally obtained Dafa. It had been thirteen years since I first read the book Falun Gong.
It seemed as if I had known Master for a while. I recalled a scene from a dream in my childhood. A broad-shouldered giant in white shirt and black suit sent me to a western style palace. I had a pair of long, beautiful wings made of crystal. A voice told me that I originated from that place. I knew deeply in my heart that I was a life coming to obtain the Fa. Thank you Master for your kind benevolence of not giving up on any disciples. Thank you to practitioners who were persistent in their truth clarification, thereby saving sentient beings.
Fa Study
I made many mistakes in Fa study. Maybe it was due to karma, as I felt dizzy as soon as I began to read the book. I didn’t attend the group Fa study at that time. My understanding of the Fa was shallow, and I gave up easily. I confused doing work with cultivation. When I attended my first Falun Dafa Experience Sharing Conference in New York, I had no idea what Master Li was talking about.
Through experience sharing with fellow practitioners, I learned the importance of studying the Fa. But I felt dizzy, anxious, and sometimes sore all over as soon as I began to read Zhuan Falun. I could only read a few paragraphs a day so I proceeded slowly. Gradually I could read a few pages a day. Sometimes answers would pop up in my mind when I had questions. Some practitioners wrote articles about reciting the Fa. I tried it too. It was no easy task. I began with one paragraph a day, and slowly increased to a few paragraphs a day, then to a few pages a day. Memorizing the Fa is a process of strengthening the mind and eliminating the attachment of fearing hardship. The main consciousness became stronger and stronger in this process. My thought karma was also eliminated in large amounts. When I reached the seventh talk, I felt that I had no problem reading the book anymore, so I began to study in earnest. Whenever reading was ineffective, I would go back to reciting the Fa.
After studying the Fa for some time, I had a recurring dream: I was busy on the highest level of a building and I was aware of being scared to go any higher. I knew that I had elevated my level, but was still within the three realms and in this material world. I increased Fa study time and tried to be more focused. During one Fa study, I saw a very young Buddha with a curly hair ascending slowly in front of me with a flying celestial maiden next to him.
Teacher told us in “Zhuan Falun”:
“Our way of practice is one where the Law refines the person, and in practices where the Law refines the person, certain states will arise from his gong and Law, so in the course of practicing, different cultivation states come about at different levels.” (Zhuan Falun)
I began to look inwards when I felt dizzy studying Dafa and to find out what I needed to cultivate and improve on. The next time I felt dizzy I closed my eyes and saw a practitioner’s face in front of me three times. I wondered what her face had to do with my Fa study. When we studied Fa that night I happened to sit next to her. I felt I was unwilling to listen to her when she talked. I told myself to quietly listen to her and look at her good points. So I listened quietly and eliminated my prejudice towards her.
The next day I went to San Francisco to clarify the facts about Falun Dafa. I saw from a distance that this practitioner was also there revealing the facts about the CCP's slanderous and deceitful propaganda. I immediately felt an immense respect for her, in that that she dressed nicely, acted properly, and was remarkable when saving people. My thoughts about her were all positive, and my mind became clear and bright. I knew that Teacher had removed my bad substances. Once I rode the subway with her. We saw two Chinese sitting on the roadside. Without a word, we went up to them and each of us successfully urged one to quit the CCP. We cooperated very well. I learned that when the wall between practitioners was removed, we improved and sentient beings were saved.
There was another occasion during Fa study when suddenly I felt dizzy again. I saw a demon of lust, rushing toward me like an arrow. Later I thought about calling a male practitioner. Then I felt a bundle of thick material trying to cover me and my brain immediately felt heavy. I realized it was interference, so I immediately sent forth-righteous thoughts and looked inward to find why I was being interfered with. From that point on I examined any inappropriate thoughts or behaviors when interacting with everyday people and male practitioners. From then on, as soon as I felt sleepy during Fa study, I would first examine myself to see if the attachment to lust was still there. I also went to Minghui.org and read articles about eliminating lust. Another time I saw a dragon in the dark. I sent forth-righteous thoughts for a long time to eliminate it. I also cleaned up my home environment and all of these measures were very effective.
Recently, I felt dizzy again when studying the Fa. I could not find the reason at that time and my head ached even after I put down the book. I knew it must be my problem. I kept looking inward, and it dawned on me that a few bundles of special editions left in my car were yet to be distributed. I thought that I would finish distributing them the next day, and my headache immediately went away. I also found that if I bore a tribulation from my husband, the Fa-study would be very effective. Once my husband gave me a tribulation and because I did not maintain my xinxing, the next day not only was my Fa-studying not effective, my child also developed illness karma, and my nose grew a big blister. I regretted my bad behavior very much.
Participating in Group Fa-study
Attending group Fa-study also makes the following day’s Fa study very smooth. Last year I delivered a paper at the Fa-conference in San Francisco, and my subsequent Fa-study was remarkably effective. I realized that the cultivation method of group Fa study and Fa Conferences that Teacher has given us have deep inner meanings.
Through Fa-study, my biggest improvement was that I changed my view towards fellow practitioners. In the past I often saw their weaknesses, now all I see is their strengths. But then, as soon as I started admiring fellow practitioners, feeling that they cultivated well, and taking them as the guide rather than the Fa, I would see behavior of the practitioners that was not conforming to the Fa. That reminded me to eliminate these attachments in me. If my righteous thoughts toward fellow practitioners were not strong and I exaggerated their shortcomings, I would be shown their good points. If I still did not enlighten to it, Master would hint it to me in a dream.
Now, whenever I see a practitioner’s shortcoming, I will look internally, as I know that it is for me to improve. When this mechanism of looking inward is formed, I can clearly feel that my cultivation is on the right track. In the past I could not find the way to be good although I did want to. Master has prepared the mechanism for us already. All we need to is to follow this mechanism of looking inward.
One day I was studying Zhuan Falun in my back yard. When I turned around, I saw a pure and white Udumbara flower. Then I saw a plant next to it with about ten of its leaves having Udumbara on them. Later I saw even more. I enlightened that it was Master encouraging me to be more diligent, since studying Fa is the most fundamental in cultivation
The Power of Righteous Thoughts
One weekend, my husband surprisingly told me that I should go to San Francisco the next day. I thought I’d misheard him. When I arrived I encountered the incident where practitioners were assaulted in Chinatown. I recognized a woman who was known for being abusive to Falun Gong and loyal to the CCP officials in San Francisco. She cried and ran around on the streets shouting out that Falun Gong practitioners were hitting people. My first thought was I could not let her do this as she was poisoning people against Falun Gong. I went to stop her and as I rushed toward her, she immediately became quiet. I felt that she was somewhat afraid of me. She tried to walk away in a different direction, but I held strong righteous thoughts and stared at her, until she was forced to leave.
Then I heard a hysterical voice from another person who was also a collaborator. He was badmouthing Master Li on the street. At the time, he had his back facing toward me. I could not bear listening to what he was saying. With no better options, I walked up to him and tapped on his shoulder. He was startled and dropped his bag. He picked up the bag, and was very upset. He pointed at me and accused me of bumping his bag and tried to get the bystanders involved. The situation was not favorable to me, but I did not want to follow his logic. I sent forth thoughts to get rid of the evil that was controlling him. I felt that my righteous thoughts were very strong, and I knew the evil was no match for the righteousness of Dafa. I thought that I wanted to protect the Fa and would not let him poison any sentient beings. At the time, he would not listen to anything, so I kept silent, only to stare at him with righteous thoughts. He tried to incite people but to no avail, and gradually as he became less aggressive he murmured and finally left.
That day I directly witnessed the power of righteous thoughts in stopping the evil. I knew that all righteous thoughts came from Dafa. I enlightened that it’s because Master did not want to leave me behind, so he arranged for me go to San Francisco and participate in this big battle of the righteous Dafa against the pitiable and ever weakening evil.
Promoting Shen Yun
Last year I met lots of resistance when introducing Shen Yun to parents at my child’s school. Because they were native English speakers and were eloquent, I felt that I wasn’t part of their circle and so never attended their activities. So I asked another student’s parent to put the Shen Yun information on the email bulletin board to invite everyone to come and see it. I was not righteous at the very beginning since I was depending on ordinary people and was afraid of difficulties and failure. Just as I asked, this parent invited everyone to see Shen Yun together. But a parent from the Philippines responded with some negative lies, and posted two evil web links on the board. I wasn’t expecting things to turn this ugly. I had to face it, but it was difficult. In addition to the language barrier, I had no experience dealing with this situation.
Teacher said in “Troubles” (Hong Yin III): “Neither heaven nor earth can block my road of Fa rectification, But disciples’ human hearts can”. I knew that I had lots of human attachments, including fear of being rejected, not being agreed with, and losing face. But I felt that despite my efforts, I did not find the root cause of my fear. Later I learned that the parents were going to get together and have tea during the weekend, so I forced myself to go. It happened that I was sitting next to the one who had uploaded the evil websites. After my self-introduction, she told me that she didn’t do it intentionally. I wanted to talk to her more, but she left half way through the gathering rather rudely. I was speechless, and felt I could not take it anymore. Later I learned that her daughter was having a birthday party. After struggling with whether to attend or not I finally convinced myself to go at the last moment. I did not mention Shen Yun at the party; rather, I just tried to have a good time. Seeing me there seemed to have touched her. Later I showed her the Shen Yun picture book at the school, and told her that I intended to post the information on the bulletin board. This time she did not upload any negative stuff. All parents from the class saw the DVD.
I sent an email to a parent who knew some Chinese and told her why I promoted Shen Yun. After seeing my email, she bought four of the best-seating tickets from me.
In promoting Shen Yun at the mall, I heard fellow practitioners there saying that I was validating myself. I looked inward, but could not find anything. I decided to not worry about the Shen Yun promotion first, but just to see if I had the attachment of validating myself, be it relating to Shen Yun or not. I kept looking inward. Finally a matter that I had been unable to resolve for a long time appeared in my mind. That was a tribulation that I could not pass, and I almost took it as a life-and-death tribulation. I suddenly saw that I did have a strong and deeply hidden attachment of trying to validate myself. Since then, I paid a lot attention to eliminating this attachment. I reminded myself not to validate myself when I was writing this sharing paper. I hope that I have written this experience sharing with a pure heart so that we can elevate together.
Above is my sharing from my current level. Please point out if any points were inappropriate.
Thank you Master. Thank you fellow practitioners.
