(Minghui.org) After seriously reflecting and looking inward, I realized my fundamental problem: I had a gap in studying the Fa, looking inward and cultivating myself solidly. I became determined to study the Fa well and cultivate myself solidly and step out of the shadow of this persecution. I began to adjust my state of mind and study the Fa diligently.
--From the author
I was fortunate to obtain the Fa in early 1996. I have walked through difficulties and setbacks on the path of Fa-rectification cultivation. Here, I would like to report my cultivation experience to Master and fellow practitioners.
Stepping out of the shadow of persecution and witnessing the power of Dafa
In 2004, I was imprisoned in forced labor camps three times and detained four times. I was physically and mentally exhausted due to the brutality of the persecution and lost my way. The last time I was released from a forced labor camp, I was in a daze and did not know how to walk the path ahead of me. In my unstable cultivation state, I was influenced by former practitioners who had “enlightened” along a deviated path to make a big mistake. After waking up, I realized the severity of this problem and deeply understood that cultivation is very serious. If I take a wrong step because one thought is not right, I may be led down an evil path and be destroyed.
I calmed down and started to think and reflect on the path that I had walked. How did I step onto the wrong path? Why did I fall repeatedly every time I came to the same place? I started digging out my fundamental attachment and seriously questioned and examined myself, starting from my first thoughts when I had come into Dafa. Eventually, I found that I had many attachments, including attachment of self-validation. But, the most fundamental reason was my lack of studying the Fa and solid cultivation.
When I cannot study the Fa with a calm mind, I'm unable to be elevated by the Fa. Thus, I walked the wrong path when undergoing tribulations. It was even worse when it came to solid cultivation. I used human notions to treat the Fa and this tribulation, and unconsciously used the mentality and concepts formed from the Communist Party culture to treat issues in the sacred cultivation. When this happened, it was difficult to correct my mistakes because I was unaware of my mistake.
After seriously reflecting and looking inward, I realized my fundamental problem: I had a gap in studying the Fa, looking inward and cultivating myself solidly. I became determined to study the Fa well and cultivate myself solidly and step out of the shadow of this persecution. I began to adjust my state of mind and study the Fa diligently. However, as soon as I studied the Fa, I encountered big interference. I had interference of sleepiness when I picked up Zhuan Falun and sometimes I would even fall asleep. Master gave me quite a few hints and I became worried. I was unable to control myself and sending forth righteous thoughts had little effect. After I saw the articles by fellow practitioners on Minghui.org mentioning the miraculous effect of memorizing the Fa, I decided to memorize the Fa. It was very difficult in the beginning as I could not remember a sentence even after repeating it over and over again.
I recalled Master what said in Zhuan Falun,
“When it’s difficult to endure, you can endure it. When it’s impossible to do, you can do it.”
I thought that no matter how difficult it was, I must memorize the Fa and I would never give up. Hence, I memorized one sentence by one sentence and gradually I began to memorize faster. Moreover, I was surprised that although memorizing the Fa progressed slowly, in the process I often enlightened to the Fa principles.
When I finally finished memorizing Zhuan Falun the first time, I found that I had changed completely. I suddenly understood many questions that I had been confused about before and my heart immediately lightened. I now understood the importance of studying the Fa even more. I began to memorize Zhuan Falun for the second time and continued to memorize it over and over again. The more I memorized, the more steadfast and steady I felt. Now I've lost count of how many times I have memorized the Fa.
When memorizing the Fa, I often keep in mind that I must cultivate myself solidly while at the same time, follow Master's requirement of measuring everything against the Fa to evaluate my every single thought.
Master said:
“Study the Fa and gain the Fa,
Focus on how you study and cultivate,
Let each and every thing
be measured against the Fa.
Only then, with that,
is it actually cultivation.”
(“Solid Cultivation” in Hong Yin)
I always keep in mind these words of Master.
When I was young, I read many books singing the praises of the evil Chinese Communist Party (CCP); thus, much of the Party's ideology was indoctrinated in my mind. After reading the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party, my mind felt blank. I felt as though I did not know how to speak or write anymore and was unable to communicate with others; this went on for a long period of time. It was only after I persisted in writing an article that exposed the evil that I gradually regained normal thinking. It is unimaginable how many of the regime's things were indoctrinated in my mind and how deeply poisoned I was by it! It was not easy to eliminate those unrighteous, wicked and evil things from my mind.
When I studied and memorized “Buddha Nature” in Zhuan Falun (Volume II), Master gave me guidance, allowing me to understand better. Although I was indoctrinated by many of the evil Party's postnatal concepts and bad thoughts, which increased the difficulty of my cultivation, my true nature had not been touched, it was only buried. Once I became aware of this, I began to constantly pay attention to every thought that emerged. I would use the Fa to evaluate my thoughts and if they did not meet the requirements of Dafa, I would immediately eliminate them. I did not allow them to stay in my mind. While eliminating them, I strengthened my righteous thoughts and main consciousness at the same time. During the process of doing so, I truly enlightened that the Fa taught by Master is the truth, the true Fa that guides cultivation. By truly believing in Dafa and complying with its requirements, one can witness the might and extraordinary nature of Dafa.
I have experienced many examples of this in the process of solid cultivation. Here, I would like to share one. I was persecuted harshly by the CCP and nearly lost my life. After being released from detention, my mind was imprinted with the scenes of what I had been subjected to there. Whenever I saw police cars or police on the streets, my mind reacted and I began to have a series of thoughts. If there was any sign of trouble, my mind would start to think of how to deal with it, etc. In addition to having deep remorse for not doing well and feeling ashamed in front of Master, I felt as though I was being pressed down by extremely heavy stones and often unconsciously sighed in despair. This greatly affected my doing the three things well. Through studying the Fa, I realized that this was not what Master wanted. This persecution was arranged by the old forces and the real purpose of their interference is to destroy Dafa disciples' righteous thoughts so as to achieve their selfish purpose. This can never be acknowledged. Master mentioned numerous times in the lectures that we should not acknowledge this persecution and we oppose all persecution.
After I studied the Fa, I understood that I should not wait to oppose the persecution only after it has occurred. Instead, I must eliminate every single thought about the persecution that surfaced in my mind. After establishing this righteous thought, I removed any direct or indirect thoughts that might acknowledge the persecution and eliminated all those thoughts that did not meet the requirements of the Fa. Hence, these unrighteous thoughts had no conditions to exist in my mind.
Although it's easy to say it, it's difficult to do it. During the process of cultivating these bad thoughts away, I truly felt that they are live beings capable of changing their tricks to increase the persecution. For example, when a practitioner reads a sharing about opposing the persecution in the detention place , he or she might think, “What would I do if I encountered this situation? How would I answer the police officer's questions if I were the practitioner who was arrested?” etc. If one imagines problems by placing himself in the position of being persecuted and does not eliminate these thoughts, it would equate to accepting it. If one has human notions, the evil factors will take advantage of it. In the beginning, this invisible contest was very intense, but I did not let up and persevered in eliminating these thoughts. Gradually, they became lesser and lesser. Sometimes when I felt that a thought was not right, I would send the word Mie (eliminate) out and the thought would be destroyed. Sometimes when righteous thoughts arose, I could feel that something was immediately taken away by Master in an instant. It was really magical.
Master said:
“In fact, let me tell everyone that matter and mind are one thing.” (Zhuan Falun)
“For a practitioner, one’s mind-intent dictates supernormal abilities to do things. For an everyday person, one’s mind-intent directs the four limbs and the sensory organs to work, just like the production office in a factory: The director’s office issues orders to each department of specific functions to carry out duties. It is also like the military headquarters: The commander’s office gives the order and directs the entire army to carry out a mission.” (Zhuan Falun)
Master clearly explained the Fa principles on how Dafa disciples should use righteous thoughts to eliminate evil. When I cultivated solidly, I was able to truly enlighten to deeper meanings of the Fa.
As I began to constantly cultivate myself solidly, my xinxing also elevated and improved. As I look inward and eliminate attachments whenever I encounter conflicts, my mind becomes more peaceful and my righteous thoughts get stronger; thus, I am completely unaffected if I am faced with issues.
Walking the path arranged by Master
During these few years, I have been involved in local Dafa work such as coordination and helping with technical things and truth-clarification material production sites. I established a material production site at my home and I could operate it independently from the beginning. However, at that time I relied on supplies from a large materials production site. Soon, the big site was in trouble; almost all of the practitioners who were involved were arrested. Suddenly, the local projects of validating the Fa nearly came to a standstill. Afterward, several incidents of persecution also occurred in our area. Faced with these circumstances, I was very anxious.
Because some people knew that I was able to produce materials, they came to me for them. More people then heard about it, and they also wanted to come and get materials. Due to the need, I wished that more practitioners would be willing to establish family-run materials production sites. During that period, there was an earthquake. I was producing the materials at home. The aftershock caused the building to shake but the printer continued to work. I knew that Master was beside me and protecting me, hence at no point was I afraid.
When the thought of hoping to establish more family-run material production sites emerged, Master helped me. Some practitioners came to ask me about it. I presented my idea to them and encouraged them to produce their own materials. I undertook the responsibility of guiding the technical aspects and teaching others while learning myself. Practitioners began to buy computers, printers and CD burners, as well as learning the techniques. Thus, one after another, material production sites were established. Local practitioners then distributed the materials they made. Those who were temporarily not able to produce the materials were still able to surf Minghui and read articles online.
In the past, when a local practitioner was arrested or pressured by the regime's agents, he wasn't able to withstand the persecution and betrayed other practitioners due to fear. Now, many of us have reduced the attachment of fear, and with coordination between practitioners, the evil is not able to find any loopholes. As a result, large-scale persecution now rarely occurs in our area. The few practitioners who were persecuted recently did not reveal other practitioners' information.
My understanding is that as long as we follow Master's requirements, use the Fa to evaluate ourselves and believe in Master and Dafa, our path of cultivation would become broader and wider. If we follow the old forces' arrangements, we would suffer setbacks and feel that there is no path ahead of us.
Helping former practitioners return to Dafa and progress with diligence
Our compassionate Master has always been very concerned about practitioners who have fallen behind and has instructed disciples numerous times to help former practitioners return to Dafa. I was able to return to Dafa because fellow practitioners reached out to me. Thus, I hope that those practitioners who are still lost return to Dafa cultivation. I spent a lot of effort going around to help former practitioners, writing letters to them or personally visiting them. Some have returned to Dafa and I was very touched and truly happy for them.
There was a former practitioner who had “enlightened” along a deviant path ten years ago. I finally found him, but he did not want to meet with me and later I lost contact with him. A few years ago, by chance, I learned that he was working near my home. I immediately went to find him, but he was still in the state of following a wicked path. However, he did not reject the Shen Yun Performing Arts DVD I gave him and this time did not refuse to meet me. Later, a few practitioners and I met with him a few times. Although he did not accept what we said, he did not refuse the things we gave him. Thus, we were able to keep meeting with him.
One day he came over and, after saying a few words, stood up and said that he did not wish to be in contact with us anymore. He had read the Nine Commentaries and many truth-clarifying materials but still insisted on his own understanding. As he was leaving, I quickly went to the door, caught his arm and said: “Don't go. Although we haven't talked things over yet, maybe it was because I was too anxious for you to understand the truth and did not take into account whether you could accept it. This is my fault, but we care for you and it's not easy for us to come together. I hope that you can come to my place frequently, and I believe that we will definitely be able to talk together.” As I spoke, my tears ran down and he was very touched. He took the books and discs I gave him and said that he would look at them when he returned home.
Other practitioners and I continued to talk to him. At last, he finally understood the truth. He quit the evil CCP and its affiliated organizations and declared his intention to resume cultivation. At the same time, his mother also returned to Dafa. Initially, we did not know that his mother had also obtained the Fa prior to the persecution but then stopped practicing. In order to help them catch up as soon as possible, we set up a Fa-study group at his house. We kept in contact for a few years, and these two practitioners improved quickly. They are now able to take the initiative and do the three things. This year, when his factory manager's son got married, the practitioner brought many copies of Shen Yun DVDs to the wedding and handed them out to all of the people there. He also clarified the truth to his factory manager and the chairman of the workers' union. His mother went through a few tests of sickness karma after studying the Fa but was able to overcome them.
One practitioner had experienced serious sickness karma and could not eat anymore, but his firm belief in Dafa touched people. Eventually, however, he drifted away from Dafa. Through his mother, also a practitioner, we arranged to study the Fa at their house, to help establish a Fa-study group for them and other local practitioners.
For those practitioners who have fallen behind, though perseverance and patience are required, we must also put ourselves in their shoes. Only if we are truly sincere can we untie the knots in their hearts and minds. However, some of the knots are difficult to untie. There are a few practitioners in other places who were persecuted seriously. Afterward, they turned to Buddhism one after another. In order to help them return to Dafa, I wrote to them many times and personally went to meet them several times. As it is inconvenient to meet often, I have yet to help them to return. But, I have not given up on them and have written to them recently, hoping that they will return to Dafa.
When I first went to meet one of the former practitioners, I could clearly feel the evil beings panic in another dimension. At that time, while I was waiting for the train at the train station, I felt the evil trying to stop me from going by trying to stop me from finding the platform and I wasn't able to get through on the telephone. I started to send forth righteous thoughts and asked Master to strengthen me. Instantly, I felt those evil beings disappear and I was then able to meet the former practitioner. When I reached her place, I saw that she had another former practitioner there. When the other former practitioner saw me, she said that she felt uncomfortable.
When she spoke, I saw that something was controlling her; her expression became very fierce and I knew it wasn't her true self. As I sent forth righteous thoughts, I told the thing that was controlling that former practitioner, “Do not speak, just listen to me!” At once, the woman became relaxed and did not say anything. That day, I talked a lot and they both listened earnestly. The next day, they had to go to work, so they asked me to come back the following week. When I came there again, however, the former practitioner who owned the home said that she was very busy and had no time for me. I felt very regretful for not being able to help her return to Dafa.
Master requires us not to leave behind a single disciple, but we have not done enough. It is very unfortunate when one does not oppose the old forces and does not return to Dafa after walking the wrong path. The old forces will create a partition, causing such a person to walk farther and farther away from Dafa and preventing him or her from coming back. When I think of what Master has endured for disciples and sentient beings, and also those people who were destroyed, I feel very sad.
I hope that my experience sharing will help fellow practitioners to pay attention to this matter, not give up on former practitioners and those sentient beings who can be saved, and be responsible to them. Saving one person may result in saving many more sentient beings, while giving up on a person may cause many lives to be lost. I hope that those practitioners who have fallen behind are able to read this article and not give up on themselves, and quickly return to Dafa.
When I recall my Fa-rectification cultivation journey of more than a decade that includes many falls, I know these are all good things. Every step of the way, our great Master compassionately cares for us. We are cultivating the Great Law of the cosmos; thus, all bad things can be turned into good things.
If there is anything inappropriate, please kindly point it out.
Thank you, Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners!
From the 9th China Fahui on Minghui.org