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Falun Dafa Changed My Selfish Nature and Saved Me from a Sea of Bitterness

Sept. 6, 2012 |   By Bai Lian, a practitioner in China

(Minghui.org) I got married in 1983. I was so conceited that my husband had to cater to my every need. At home, whatever I said goes. As a strong-willed woman, I was very unforgiving of others. In addition, I was astute in business, shrewd in money matters, and good at backdoor deals. With my ferocity, life should have followed my will, right? Just the opposite – I did not have one easy day.

From 1983 to 1994, I experienced a string of miscarriages. After lying in bed for a year, I finally bore a son. Since then, I developed insomnia, became timid and overcautious, and entertained foolish ideas. I routinely visited doctors, and my hospital bills cost several thousand yuan every year. Later on, I became weaker and weaker and was burdened with illnesses: pyelonephritis, HBV hepatitis, antral gastritis, enteritis, anemia, and others. My bones felt limp and glutted. My weight dropped from 65 kilograms (143 pounds) to around 45 kilograms (99 pounds). Desperate for a cure, I visited many western doctors, herbalists, and even sorcerers. No one could cure my diseases. My digestive system could not process even porridge. Once, when I ate a little pork, I ended up laying in bed and could not eat for nine days. Even though I did not eat, I felt bloated and had constant diarrhea. The suffering was inhuman.

Seeking a Cure, Finding Dafa, and Gaining a New Life

In October 1994, one colleague told me that his sister-in-law had suffered a stroke. After attending Falun Gong classes with the help of others in Zhengzhou, Henan Province, she fully recovered. Not believing it at the time, I laughed and said, “How can it be that miraculous? Do immortals exist?”

When I visited my sister, she noticed my ill appearance and suggested that I pay 20 yuan to go learn a qigong practice near her home. I was playing mahjong at the time and brushed her off, saying “I can't even walk, not to mention do exercises.” Later, a good friend of mine suggested that I learn Falun Gong. She said, “Falun Gong is in the Buddha school. It will remove illnesses and improve fitness.” I paid attention to this sentence. I heard that my employer would soon stop reimbursing medical costs, so it would be painful to have to pay the thousands of yuan myself every year! After hearing that learning Falun Gong was free of charge, I decided to give it a try.

I spent my lunch breaks at my colleague's home learning how to do the exercises, one set per day. In those seven days, I did not have diarrhea, and my bowel movements became regular for the first time in ten years. I hesitantly bought a big bowl of noodles with lard. I digested it all! Hey, could Falun Gong really be this miraculous? I ask to borrow some books from my colleague. He looked me over as if I was an alien and asked, “I only have one book. Can you understand it?” I insisted and promised to return the book as soon as I was finished. He finally agreed and handed me the book Falun Gong. After I finished reading it in one sitting, I was deeply moved: I understood that the reason I suffered from a lot of diseases at a young age was because I was too ferocious, too selfish, and too shrewd.

When I returned the book the next day, my colleague asked, “You finished it? What did you understand?” I stammered and could only say, “I...this book teaches me how to be a good person. This is not written by an ordinary person – it was written by a sage.” He again looked at me for a while and said, “Oh, so you know what a 'sage' is!”

Thinking back to that time, I couldn't blame others for disparaging me. I had really sharpened my mind to pursue fame and personal interest. How far I was from the Dao!

Finally, on October 22, 1994, I obtained the Fa! Through reading Dafa books, I understood that cultivation involves improving the mind. One must take personal interests lightly. One must be tolerant of others, sincere, compassionate, and be a good person based on the standards of “Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance.” I no longer wanted to be the person I was before.

At a factory, my job was to pick out defective silkworm cocoons, and I was paid based on the weight of the rejected cocoons. To increase my earnings, I used to act in a perfunctory manner and throw out some good silkworm cocoons on purpose. I gained much while the factory lost more. After I started to practice Falun Gong, I became serious about my job. Although I earned less than I did before, I felt at ease because I knew the factory lost less.

The more I studied the Fa, the more I felt ashamed. When I did business before, to maximize profit, I moved lumber from my hometown to sell in the cities. I sold regular lumber as high-grade product. I used deception to take advantage of others and thought that I was “smart.” I was downright foolish! In the end, it all came back to me in the form of illnesses, and I suffered day after day. Back then I considered killing myself and ending it all, and might have done so had it not been for my young son.

Once I understood what I did wrong and decided to truly become a good person, Master began to cleanse my body. During the weekend, I started shivering and having diarrhea. Mixed with blood and pus, my waste smelled extremely bad. On Monday, it all stopped, and I could go to work easily. Without one pill, the antral gastritis I had been suffering from for a decade was healed completely. How healthy am I now? Using my husband's words, I “can eat stones.”

Before, I could not work and could only sit around the house uselessly. Now, I ride my bicycle more than 30 li (~ 9 miles) to and from work every day. I easily carry a barrel of water in each hand up six flights of stairs, mop the floor, cook, and do laundry. I happily volunteer to do all the chores. After obtaining Dafa, no amount of hardship amounts to hardship.

My Husband Awakens and Repents

In July 1999, the dictator Jiang Zemin and the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) launched the brutal persecution of Falun Gong. Dark clouds suddenly gathered overhead, and rumors and slander blotted out the sky and the land. My husband became lost in the delusion and became frightened because policemen were arresting practitioners and ransacking their homes everywhere. As if possessed by something, he quarreled with me and did not allow me to continue practicing.

At first, he tried to “change me by persuasion:” as long as I gave up cultivation, he promised to take care of me like before (after I started practicing and my health improved, he stopped doing any household chores and waited for food to be brought to him in bed). I did not agree with him, because I knew that was not what a good person wants! After his persuasion failed to work, he took a tougher stance. He played mahjong, had temper tantrums, tore Dafa books, threw around exercise music tapes, and cursed at Master and Dafa. He labeled me an anti-Party counterrevolutionary and tried to force me into divorce. I warned him not to commit evil deeds against Dafa, the Buddha Fa, or he would face retribution in the future. He patted his chest and spitted, “Retribution? I'm not afraid of retribution! I don't believe in gods! Buddha Fa? If you're so able, try flying to the top of the water tower across the street!” He behaved like a hooligan, a member of the evil CCP.

Once, when he noticed me heading out, he thew a pan on the floor, scattering food everywhere. Seeing that I did not react, he looked for an ax and threatened to chop off my feet. Unfazed, I continued to go out to appeal for Dafa and clarify the facts. If not for Dafa, I might have died a long time ago. How can I allow the bunch of scoundrels to slander Dafa?

At the end of 2000, I was illegally arrested, hung up, and viciously beaten by policemen. “Whap! Whap!...” They beat me with a club as thick as a beer bottle, but I did not feel any pain. The club finally broke. When the policemen got tired, they sent me to a detention center, where I was confined for almost a year. My husband repeatedly demanded a divorce, but I knew it was not his real intention, so I did not agree.

In August 2001, I returned home and was shocked to find him lying on the sofa, thin as a skeleton and cuddled in a ball like a cat. As someone who applied to join the air force, he used to be strong and healthy. But now...

His brother hugged him and cried. He had hydrothorax: his lungs were filled with bubbles, and two-thirds of his lungs festered. He gasped for breath and took medicine for treating liver cancer.

After repeated questioning, his brother told me the truth about his condition. We borrowed money from everywhere for his surgery. According to the doctor, a prompt operation would give him about eight months. My husband then said, “In that case, I do not want the treatment. Otherwise, we would lose both man and wealth.”

I had an idea. I asked him what his plan was. He answered straightforwardly, “It is up to you. Didn't you recover from your major diseases without taking any medicine? So I wouldn't take any medicine either.” I told him, “This is not a disease. It is caused by the karma you made when you cursed at Master and Dafa...” He understood what happened and sincerely wanted to mend his ways. He repeatedly listened to the Fa lectures and recited silently, “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Benevolence-Forbearance is good.”

After a few days, he met his doctor again. The doctor looked him over and said, “You look like a different man!”

My husband fully believed in Dafa. From then on, he completely supported my cultivation. When I distributed truth-clarification materials, Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party, and Shen Yun Performing Arts DVDs, he stood watch for me. Once, he found a copy of the Nine Commentaries in a trash can, cleaned it up, hid it in his clothes, and gave it to his political instructor in the military. The instructor was scared to say anything directly supportive, but told him to be careful in the future.

Through supporting Dafa, my husband received great blessings. He became healthy and was always praised by his superiors at work. He himself even acknowledged that he was “helped by gods.”

Grateful for Master's Protection

During his nap in middle school, my son rolled off the top bunk and hit his head on a wooden box. His teacher took him to the hospital, where he was found to have a severe concussion. When we received the call, my husband was so scared that he could not walk. I immediately knelt in front of Master's portrait and begged Master to save my son. We rushed to the hospital to find our son lying on a bed in the emergency room. His face was colorless, and he was unconscious and incontinent. The doctor said that he would need to be hospitalized for a month. However, no more than four days passed before our son fully recovered and was jumping up and down on the bed. Even the doctor found it strange. My son liked to study, got good grades, and was anxious about an upcoming math test, so he wanted to leave the hospital and go back to school. Upon his return, his teacher was afraid of lasting effects from the concussion. On the next test, he received 117 out of 120 points. His teacher was relieved and felt that it was miraculous. This teacher was my brother-in-law, who told me to acquire more medicine during my son's hospitalization and offered to reimburse me through the school's account. I politely declined.

During that time, I used a thermos to deliver lunch to my son. The thermos was made of glass and plastic. My son held the thermos and dug at it with a metal spoon. While his face was buried in the thermos, suddenly there was a loud bang – the glass container exploded and blasted shattered glass pieces into his face. Shocked, I quickly said, “Don't worry, Master is protecting you.” I used tissue to wipe his face clean. Not a piece of skin was broken, and his eyes were fine.

During high school, a large bump appeared on my son's thigh. His uncle told him to get surgery, but he refused. He knew that Dafa is good, but during the smothering persecution, the wicked people took advantage of my year-long detention and used his family ties to delude him. They told him our family separation and financial ruin was caused by my practicing Falun Gong, not because of their persecution. They forced him to write articles and make speeches denouncing Dafa at large assemblies. My son knew in his heart that doing these bad things would incur retribution and was very sad, so he published a statement on the Minghui website declaring his actions null and void. He did not go to the hospital for surgery. Despite oozing some blood and pus, the wound was not infected. It soon formed a scab and fully healed. My son again validated Dafa's extraordinary power.

At another time, my family rode in my brother's farm truck, which had six seats in the front and cargo space in the back. We were almost up a large hill when the doors suddenly opened for some reason. My niece, nephew, and I fell from the high vehicle and rolled all the way down the hill. I fell head-first, and my hand was barely an inch from the one of the truck's wheels. My son cried for his mom from inside the truck. My brother was scared out of his wits, afraid that we had fallen to our deaths. In fact, my niece only scraped her knee, and my nephew was completely unharmed. My niece and my brother both said, “We were blessed today by my sister's Master! It was He who protected us!”

Bathed in Master's grace, it would take more than three days to talk about all the miracles of Dafa our family experienced. Falun Dafa is good! Falun Dafa is really good! I am thankful for Master's salvation.