(Minghui.org)
Greetings Master! Greetings Fellow Practitioners!
I'm an Italian Dafa practitioner. I would like to share my cultivation experiences.
Through my husband, I began practicing Dafa. He invited me to join the local Fa-study group. Initially, I could feel that group Fa study and experience sharing among practitioners benefited me a lot. Now, even though I have cultivated for a period of time, I can still feel the positive influence brought about by group Fa study.
I remember that after Fa study, practitioners shared their experiences with each other, which helped me to understand Fa a lot. I learned to search inward.
I'm not very experienced in cultivation, but I realized if we want to do well in clarifying the truth, it is crucial for practitioners to communicate well and to study Fa well. If we wish to keep pace with Master's Fa-rectification process, if we want to reach the standard in our individual cultivation, if we want to fulfil our prehistoric vows, we cannot ignore Fa study.
A few months after having obtained the Fa, I attended a European Fa conference for the first time. I have to accept that I couldn't understand the speeches at the conference and I even fell asleep. But when I got back home, I felt a huge power pushing me forward to be diligent in my personal cultivation. Master was already looking after me. However, my understanding of the Fa was very shallow at the time. But I remembered two things. One was to study Fa as much as I could to keep pace with the Fa-rectification process. The other was to clarify the truth. From then on, I started to attend local truth-clarification events and other activities to introduce the Fa. Later, I attended nationwide truth-clarification activities.
Every time I attended both national and international experience sharing events, I could feel a huge momentum within me. However, it was a shame that when I went back home, the momentum became weaker and ordinary people's thoughts and attachments would hide the real me, the part that has already assimilated Dafa, the part that allowed me to get on the right track.
In his Fa teaching, Master repeatedly told us of the importance of Fa study. This Fa teaching seemed quite simple, but I understood this only gradually during the process of becoming more mature. Though rationally I understood, in practice I still encountered a lot of problems, a lot of interference, and test after test.
The experience that left me with the biggest impression was when we were organizing a screening of the film, Free China , which was to be held at our town's City Hall. We had several practitioners working together on the project. Some of us called local elected officials to invite them to join us. A week before the event, there were still a few politicians whom we hadn't contacted, so I hurried to phone them. Because of being so busy in advance of the screening, I spent less time on Fa study and doing the exercises, and did not pay enough attention to my individual cultivation.
On the day of the screening, my cultivation state was very bad and I could not maintain righteous thoughts, with all of my human attachments coming up. The elected officials we had invited didn't turn up. Instead, a lot of ordinary citizens came to the screening. I was very upset and felt that the event was not successful, because the politicians hadn't turned up. I was not in a mood to talk to all those people.
Although I obviously didn't do very well, thanks to Master and fellow practitioners, the entire audience was moved by the film. Some of them even asked for details about the local exercise site so that they could learn the practice.
After that, I had a very strong and disturbing feeling of instability, so I decided to use all my time to study the Fa. Initially, I wanted to study the Fa but I could not concentrate until I read Master's Fa teaching “What is a Dafa Disciple.” Master's words stayed in my mind, “What I think is: The only path that lies before you, the disciples of Dafa, is one of real cultivation. There is no other path.”
Master also said, “You are cultivators. I’m not talking about your past, what you once were, or what you display on the surface. I am talking about your core and the meaning of your life, the responsibility you shoulder, and your historic mission. Only thus are you truly a Dafa disciple.” (“What is a Dafa Disciple”)
Since I didn't study the Fa well, I lost my foundation. Without the Fa's guidance, how could I really help Master to rectify the Fa? How could I say that I am a Dafa disciple? How could I forget who I was and my mission? Without the Fa's guidance, all my activities are human activities guided by human thoughts.
I felt that I could not face Master, and was very sad. So I determined to make up for it. I understood that I should search inward and really cultivate myself. The desire for the success of the film screening, for recognition, for looking good in other people's eyes, had replaced the righteous thoughts that a practitioner should have. I wished to have many people come to the screening, but I had different thoughts about different people, in that I only looked at their social status; I didn't think that they are all sentient beings to be saved. Master told us that clarifying the truth should aim at people's hearts, offering an opportunity for them to choose their future.
After being taught this lesson, I have no longer ignored Fa study. Fa is the air I breathe. Now I increasingly realize why Master told us to “take the Fa as Master,” and that we could find the answers to all of our questions in the Fa. Master has offered us everything we need to go back home and fulfil our prehistoric vows. As long as we do things according to the Fa and do not put ourselves or our human attachment in the primary place, everything will be fine.
I could see that I did not cooperate well with fellow practitioners in much of what I did. I didn't fully trust the local fellow practitioners. In particular, there were a lot of contradictions between my husband and me.
Because my husband and I always attended truth-clarification events together, it was very important for me to cooperate well with him. I give thanks to Master for offering me such a cultivation environment. I felt that I must be strict with myself, so that I could be responsible to my cultivation and to the Fa as well. A lot of the time when I had to interact with my husband, I could not search inward, and could not be compassionate and tolerant towards him. I was far from living up to Master's request.
Master told us: “Forbearance is the key to improving one’s xinxing. To endure with anger, grievance, or tears is the forbearance of an everyday person who is attached to his concerns. To endure completely without anger or grievance is the forbearance of a cultivator.”（What is Forbearance (Ren)? / Essentials for Further Advancement ）
I always criticized my husband more than I praised him. I couldn't see his good points and always wished that he would do things according to my understanding and requirements. Thus I always criticized him. I realized that this was not fair for him, and that my behavior did not meet Master's requirement of seizing the opportunity to search inward and improve myself. I realized that whenever I see his weakness, I should look at myself and get myself right. I realize that I have a very strong attachment to fighting, while in practicing cultivation, we should keep a modest attitude.
Once, I translated an article for the Clearharmony website, written by a young practitioner in Mainland China. He described his experience of making truth-clarification materials and writing articles for the Minghui website. The truth-clarification content he put together was chosen and read by the editors at Minghui, who edited it and reinforced it with more powerful truth-clarification material. When I translated this part, I thought: his work was modified, he must be very upset. But the practitioner's response was totally different from mine. He thanked the Minghui editors, and was very moved by their modification. Because he realized that Dafa disciples are one body, everyone is supporting each other unconditionally. The aim is to achieve better effectiveness in clarifying the truth and saving more sentient beings.
I feel ashamed of my not-so-righteous thoughts, but I thank Master for giving me the opportunity to realize the importance of getting rid of my strong sense of self. I should put the Fa in the first place. But during interactions with my husband, I just didn't want to accept criticism. I always felt what I did was right. I didn't have a modest attitude.
Sometimes I thought it seemed quite hard to get rid of attachments, but I remembered what Master said: “I can sense the state of your thinking--"It's hard, really hard." But didn't you wait those thousands of years just for today?! Could your future Consummation compare with this little bit that you're enduring today?!” (“Explaining the Fa During the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference”)
I understand that I am far behind Master's requirements for us. I have many human attachments to let go. But I know I should be strict with myself and should be diligent in my personal cultivation. I grasp this point very well. I understand that only if one can do well in individual cultivation, can one really cooperate well with other practitioners.
Thank you, Master for giving us such a beautiful Dafa and offering me the opportunity to become a Dafa disciple. Thanks to my fellow practitioners for their help and support. Here, I also thank the editors on the Minghui website, and all the practitioners working on the Italian Clearharmony website. Being able to always read fellow practitioners' sharings has helped me so much in my cultivation and improvement.
If there is anything not correct, please point it out with compassion.
Thank you Master! Thank you fellow practitioners!
(Presented at the 2013 European Falun Dafa Experience Sharing Conference in Copenhagen)