(Minghui.org) I'm a new practitioner. I feel that I am not diligent, but am determined to validate Dafa. Just a few days after I joined the local Fa study group, I started having symptoms of illness. I didn't realize this was because Master was purifying my body. My wife, along with other practitioners told me, “You just started cultivation, yet Master is already taking care of you.” I thought to myself, since everyone is telling me this is a good thing, I'll just endure the symptoms. Shortly afterwards, all the symptoms were gone.
I'm fifty-seven years old and used to be a person with quite a few shortcomings. I didn't have a lot of interaction with people; just my mother, wife and son. I was very stubborn, and it was hard for me to believe in anything. I used to smoke and drink, was narrow-minded, grumpy, fussy and lazy. I know people used to talk about me behind my back and say I was “weird.” But Master didn't give up on me.
For me, the path to become a practitioner was bumpy and full of twists and turns. When my wife first started practicing Dafa, I didn't object. After the persecution started, I had fear, and turned my fear and frustration towards Dafa. Eventually, I learned the truth about Dafa and became a practitioner myself.
1. Persecution Turned Me Against My Wife
My wife started practicing Dafa in 1996. At that time, I was very supportive of her. When local practitioners held a Falun Dafa Calligraphy and Painting Exhibition, I went to see the exhibition with her and felt good about it. Even though I was not a practitioner, I was proud to have a practitioner in the family.
Several years later, the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) launched a brutal campaign to persecute Dafa practitioners. The government fabricated lies against Dafa; they staged bloody events to frame Dafa and to instigate Chinese people's hatred towards Dafa. Like millions of other Chinese people, I was deceived by the lies and turned against Dafa. The cruel persecution of my wife and my family left a deep scar in me and blocked my path to Dafa. The following are just a few examples.
We were woken up late one night by someone pounding on the door. I didn't want to open the door, but the loud pounding continued, and we didn't want to wake all the neighbors. I opened the door and several police officers rushed in. They ransacked our entire house. In their search they found several CDs of Master's lectures and a few Dafa flyers. They dragged my wife out of bed and toward the door. My son was terrified and cried. While I tried to comfort my son, the police took my wife away.
On another day, my wife had just walked out of the house with our son to take him to school when she was stopped by several police officers. They snatched her purse out of her hands and began searching in it. They found a few Dafa flyers and said she had to go with them. She insisted on taking our son to school and began to walk away with him. One officer grabbed her and pushed her to the ground. I saw what was happening and ran out to help. I started to argue with the officers.
My wife and son were able to get away. The officers insisted that I had obstructed police business. They made me go to the police station and tried to convince me to sign a statement saying that I had interfered in their work. I refused to sign. They told me I must either sign it or bring my wife down to the police station. I was worried about my wife, son, and home, so I reluctantly signed the paper.
During the 2008 Olympics, the police again came to my house at night. This time, my wife was not home. They refused to leave and slept on my bed overnight. In the morning, I needed to go to the local market to deliver milk, but the police would not let me leave. I missed the delivery time. Later when I hurried to the market, it was too late. I took the milk and went home feeling upset and sad.
Every time the police came to harass us, my wife had to leave home for some period of time. I had to shoulder the burden of everything – taking care of our son, all the household chores, and a full-time job. I was so busy, the house became a mess. I was tired and on the brink of mental collapse. Since I still believed the CCP's lies about Dafa, I took out my frustration on my wife and Dafa.
I was afraid that if my wife continued to practice Dafa, I would lose everything. I threatened her with divorce, but that didn't work. I started to curse her, and then hit her. When she studied the Fa, I would grab the book and throw it out the door. When she sent forth righteous thoughts, I pushed her down. And when other practitioners came over, I kicked them out of the house. The very worst part is that I also cursed Dafa and Master.
At that time, there were so many evil factors in other dimensions controlling me. Instead of helping my wife to oppose the persecution, I was used by the evil factors to aid the persecution. I made the situation worse for my wife, and in the process, I committed immense sins.
Fortunately, my wife didn't give up on me. No matter how poorly I treated her, she told me about Dafa and the persecution and guided me to do the right thing. After I read the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Partyand watched many DVDs, I finally knew the truth about Dafa and realized how foolish I had been.
I regretted all my wrongdoings. My wife helped me to write a Statement of Repentance, and it was published on the Minghui website.
The Minghui Fahui provided a platform and opportunity for me to atone for my sins. I wanted to express my heart-felt gratitude towards Master and fellow practitioners working at Minghui.
2. Master Saved Me from Despair
Master said,
“... a person will have to bear the consequences of everything he does in this world; whatever he has done, he will have to pay for it via karmic retribution. In some cases the retribution is immediate, in the current lifetime. That serves to remind, or warn, people. In other cases the retribution occurs later.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2013 Western U.S. Fa Conference”)
In early summer 2011, I reached a low point in my life. One day, after I finished selling milk at the market and was on my way home, I suddenly felt ill. My legs, feet and hands were numb and uncontrollable. I managed to get home and said to my wife, “Something is wrong. I don't feel right.” My wife didn't believe me. She told me I looked just fine.
The next day, more symptoms appeared. My speech was slurred, my mouth was crooked, I was drooling, and I couldn't bend my fingers. I wasn't able to tie my shoes or buckle my belt. I lost the ability to hold chopsticks or a spoon when eating, and my son had to assist me in the bathroom. This was a big blow to me. I went from being healthy to being useless. Sadness overcame me; my son and I both cried.
My wife didn't cry. She was very calm and asked a fellow practitioner for help. They sent forth righteous thoughts for me. The practitioner told me, “Don't worry and don't be afraid. Believe in Master and Dafa. Master will save you.” She told me how her relative was diagnosed with having a stroke but fully recovered with strong righteous thoughts and a firm belief in Master; she told me many other similar stories. She also took over one of my job responsibilities so we didn't lose any money while I was going through this sickness retribution.
To alleviate my worries, my wife went to the hospital with me. I was diagnosed with a “brain stem stroke” and was asked to stay at the hospital to start treatment. My wife told the doctors, “I don't think his situation is that bad. We'll go home and see how he does.” The doctors prescribed some medicine, and we went home.
At home, my wife persuaded me to study Zhuan Falun with her. I finished studying the first seven lectures and was recovering quickly. In just two months, all the symptoms of my “brain stem stroke” disappeared. I could work again. Four years have passed, and I've never been back to the hospital or needed to take any medicine. Master saved me. Dafa gave me a new life.
3. Transforming into a True Practitioner
After I finished studying seven lectures of Zhuan Falun, I changed jobs, and we moved to a new place. I stopped studying the Fa for almost a year. On Chinese New Year on February 2, 2013, several young practitioners persuaded me to join their Fa-study group. This helped me to remove the blockage that prevented me from studying the Fa. I finally started my cultivation.
The old forces arranged various tribulations and tried very hard to have me give up practicing Dafa, using my leftover human notions and attachments. But with Master's protection, my wife, and other fellow practitioners' help, I was able to overcome the tribulations. During this time, Master and fellow practitioners did a great deal for me.
Because I study the Fa a lot, I don't feel restless or anxious anymore. I'm no longer narrow-minded or vain and can accept other people's criticism. I don't think studying the Fa is tiresome, and I removed my attachment to watching TV. Nowadays, I study Fa and watch Master's exercise DVD every day. I also quit smoking and drinking.
Before I started practicing Dafa, certain foods always caused me to have diarrhea. Now I can eat all kinds of food with no digestive issues. When my wife is busy, I now can help with household chores such as cooking, grocery shopping. cleaning the floors, kitchen, dishes, and bathrooms – things I never helped with before I became a practitioner. I can even mend my son's clothes.
I also helped my wife with truth-clarification work. My wife produces truth-clarification materials, and I'm responsible for transporting and delivering those materials. Occasionally, I would distribute materials such as table calendars.
Although the truth-clarification work I did was not a lot, it was an important first step for me. People who know me well told me that I changed into a completely different person. I know that Master and the immense Fa transformed me.
I know I still have many attachments. The human notions formed over the years inside me tried to control me from time to time, so I couldn't always look at things from the perspective of the Fa. This is something I need to break through. I also need to study the Fa more, pay more attention to cultivation, and save more people.
4. Wishing More People Would Know the Truth
Even though I had obtained the Fa, it is my wish that other people, including my relatives and other predestined people who don't know the truth about Dafa yet, will benefit from my story and understand Dafa.
My experience shows the boundless transforming power of Dafa. Dafa can turn rusty iron into useful steel. Even a “weirdo” like me whose life was about to end can be saved and changed into a better person. I wish people would start reading Zhuan Falun. They will receive abundant benefits.
Master said,
“The world's people are mostly deities from Heaven” (“The Path to Heaven” from Hong Yin III)
“... the kings of every country throughout the entire world of every historical period, and numerous kings in the heavens, all incarnated in China and [many of them] are currently Chinese persons.” (“Fa Teaching on World Falun Dafa Day”, 2014)
“And in recent times, many representatives came from high levels to obtain the Fa, and even greater kings from the heavens also reincarnated in China. Many historical figures of great virtue reincarnated in China as well ...” (“Fa Teaching at the 2013 Western U.S. Fa Conference”)
I care about these people. I sincerely hope they can cherish their own lives, know the truth, and obtain the Fa. That way, they can continue to be kings in heaven.
