(Minghui.org) I first discovered Falun Gong 12 years ago when I was imprisoned in a detention center in November 2001. I would like to share how the practice turned my life around.
I am a 58-year-old retired government official. Before retiring, I worked at a law department in the government. During the persecution of Falun Gong, part of my job was to “transform” practitioners and coerce them into renouncing their belief.
I didn't know anything about Falun Gong. I was just trying to finish the tasks assigned to me. I refused to listen to practitioners, and didn't want to give them any chances to talk. Consequently, I missed many opportunities to learn the truth about Falun Gong.
The work environment I was in was like a dye vat that pollutes everybody in it. Everybody indulges in extravagant food, gambling, and other corrupt forms of entertainment. I was one of them. Mahjong (a Chinese gambling game) had become one of my main outlets. I played it all the time.
Meanwhile, I developed all kinds of diseases in my stomach, heart, shoulders, back, and legs. My husband had a short temper, and I was not a person who could tolerate well. We often had fights, which eventually led to divorce.
My mind and body were both tired and painful, and I was constantly foggy headed. Sometimes, I thought about becoming a nun, living a simple life in a temple.
One night in March 2001, I had a dream. In the dream, I climbed a ladder that went to heaven. There were a few people at the top of the ladder. I was thinking in the dream, “Who said that an everyday person can't go to heaven? Aren't I going to heaven? This is great. I won't suffer anymore.”
After I woke up, I said to myself, “This is a lucky dream. I will definitely win money tonight at mahjong.” However, I lost a lot of money that night. After I started practicing Falun Gong, I realized that the dream was a hint given by Master, who had been watching me even before I started practicing.
We cannot control our fate. A few days after the first dream, I had another, in which a flying spaceship kept circling in heavy clouds, and the clouds made the whole world dark. It seemed that the heavens were about to collapse. I woke up in a panic.
I thought that it was a bad omen. A few days later, a disaster befell me. One of my relatives had a business, in which I was involved. The business had legal troubles, and I was arrested and jailed in a detention center.
I could not accept this sudden disaster, and complained that it was not fair. It was the lowest point in my life. I even thought about killing myself. I wondered why this had happened to me. Looking back at my life, I felt I had experienced more suffering than joy. I was lost, because I could not see the karmic relationships.
Many Falun Gong practitioners were jailed in the same detention center. They often tried to tell me about Falun Gong. I refused to listen at the beginning. I said to them, “You guys say that you try to be good people. I have been a good person all my life, but I ended up being detained here.”
A practitioner told me, “From the angle of cultivation, everything has a karmic reason. Maybe this is your chance to learn about Falun Gong and start to practice it.” I didn't understand. She continued, “Maybe your being detained is actually protecting you from some sort of danger that may have occurred if you were outside of here.”
Their words comforted me somewhat. I realized that I should just lay down all my worries and just face whatever it is I ought to face.”
I was waiting for the results of my case, but there was no progress. Meanwhile, more and more practitioners were sent to this detention center. I shared a cell with some of them, so I often overheard their conversations. Sometimes, their words made sense to me, and touched my heart. They were all healthy, and their behavior was different from everyday people. Gradually, I developed a new understanding of Falun Gong.
I started to listen to them and ask them questions. One practitioner asked me to do the exercises with them. I said, “Before I retired from a law department in the government, my job was to transform Falun Gong practitioners, trying to make them renounce their faith. Now, you are asking me to practice? I will not.”
She said, “If you start practicing, our Master will take care of you. He can re-arrange your fate. Your case will probably get dismissed, and you will be released.” I didn't believe her.
Six months had passed, but I hadn't heard anything about my case. Nor did I know when I would be released. One day a practitioner recited the following passages of the Fa teachings for me.
“When people do not have virtue, natural calamities and man-made disasters will abound. When the earth does not have virtue, everything will wither and fall. When heaven deviates from the Dao, the ground will crack, the sky will collapse, and the whole universe will be empty. When the Fa is right, the universe will be right. Life will flourish, heaven and earth will be stable, and the Fa will exist forever.” (“When the Fa is Right” in Essentials for Further Advancement)
and
“He who acts for his name, a life of anger and hate is his He who acts for profit, cold is he, knowing not his kin He who acts for emotion, many are the troubles he brings himself Bitter, fighting away, he makes karma all his life.
Not seeking a name, life is carefree and content Not set on profit, one is known as humane and righteous Not stirred by emotion, the mind is quiet, desires few Kind, cultivating himself, he builds up virtue all his years.” (“An Upright person from Hong Yin)
The poems deeply touched me. She told me that they were written by their Master, and there were more. She said, “Falun Gong teaches people to be good. Why don't you learn?” I said, “Let me read the book first.” However, there were no Falun Gong books available in the detention center.
Magically, a few days later a practitioner managed to bring a copy of Zhuan Falun into the detention center. I read it. “There is nothing wrong with these teachings! It is a good practice, and it improves one's body and mind. Aren't people who practice 'Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance' good people? Why does the government ban it?” I asked myself.
Two days after I read the book, I had another dream. A tree made of iron blossomed in my dream. A beautiful yellow flower covered the iron tree, which was in the shape of a pine tree.
I was excited and told the practitioners who were with me, “I will hear about my case soon. I will go home soon.” One practitioner said to me, “You will start practicing Falun Gong soon.” I looked at her, and didn't say anything. At that time I only wanted the lawsuit to finalize, and go home.
I waited for a few days. But still, there was no progress in my case. I thought that maybe those practitioners were right. I am still here because I need to learn Falun Gong. Shall I give it a try?
I was hesitant because Falun Gong is banned in China. But I didn't want to lose the chance either. I thought maybe my luck would change and I would be released sooner if I started practicing it. I could then practice it at home. It doesn't require living in a temple, and it is good for my health. I should give it a try, I thought.
I started my cultivation with such a purpose. That was November 2001. Now looking back, all I want to say is: “Master, you have worked hard to save me. Your efforts are not in vain. The iron tree in my heart blossoms now.” Master has saved me from a depraved lifestyle. I also appreciate those other practitioners' efforts, who never gave up on me, patiently telling me the beauty of cultivation.
Practitioners taught me the exercises, and recited Hong Yin and other articles by Master for me. Soon, I memorized Lunyu and Hong Yin . I also diligently practiced the exercises. I sat in the double-lotus position in meditation at the very beginning. When my legs were in pain, I recited Master's words, “When it’s difficult to endure, you can endure it. When it’s impossible to do, you can do it.” (Zhuan Falun)
One month later, I was able to sit in double-lotus for an hour. The strong energy flow moved my head from right to left during the third exercise, and my arms felt very light during the fourth exercise.
The pain in my stomach, heart, shoulders, and back was gone in 30 days, especially the pain in my back, which used to make it difficult for me to turn over in bed. My legal case was resolved soon after I started practicing, and I was released without any charges.
Looking back now, I understand that I would not have been able to obtain the Fa and start practicing if it wasn't for that ordeal. I cannot express my appreciation to Master with language. All I can do is to cultivate well, and not betray Master's salvation.
At home I didn't have any Falun Gong books. I knew the importance of studying the Fa, so I called a practitioner that I met in the detention center, asking her for help. A few days later, she found me a copy of Zhuan Falun and of The Great Consummation Way of Falun Dafa .
I read the books and practiced the exercises every day. I told my parents how I benefitted from practicing. They were supportive.
I often told my friends, co-workers, and relatives, from a third-person angle, what I learned about Falun Gong. I told them not to say bad things about Falun Gong, because it teaches people to practice Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance.
I told them that I witnessed the upright demeanor of practitioners in the detention center. I also told them the facts of the persecution. Some of my friends smiled and said, “You couldn't transform Falun Gong practitioners, but you have become transformed by them in the detention center.”
I said, “It is true. I knew very little about Falun Gong before. In the detention center, I learned a lot. You should think about it. Why do so many people practice it? If it is not beneficial, why are more than 100 million people practicing it? You should try to learn more about it too.”
One year after I got home from the detention center, two practitioners, who lent Falun Gong books to me, came to my house. (Later, I learned that they had been transformed through brainwashing while detained, and were on a demonic path.) They wanted to take the books back. They told me that they needed to collect all the books and burn them. They also tried to convince me to quit practicing.
I was confused at first. They were among the ones who taught me the exercises. Should I listen to them? Later, my mind became clear. “Putting other things aside, I know that Falun Gong has healed my diseases. How can I give it up? How can I give the books away and let them burn them? Even an everyday person should be grateful when he or she has been helped by others,” I said to myself, “They are doing wrong things. I will not give the books back to them.”
I told them that my sister borrowed the books and I didn't listen when they pressured me to give up the practice. Since then, I read the Fa and did the exercises even more diligently than before.
I later told another practitioner what happened. She said to me, “Don't listen to them. They've taken a demonic path. You did the right thing. Let me know if you need any help.”
I encountered a tribulation on May 15, 2010, and I would like to share it.
My sister's one-year-old son was sick, and she asked me to go to the hospital with them. On the way to the hospital, she had to return home for something, so she asked me to carry the baby there first.
When I went to cross the street, I lost my balance. The baby was about to fly out of my right arm. At that moment, a strong force, out of nowhere, moved the baby from my right arm to the left one.
I held the baby tightly with my left arm, and fell down onto my right arm, which somewhat supported my fall. The baby cried, but was not hurt. I smiled at him, “It is okay. My Master protected us.” It was a miracle. I could not believe that I was able to hold the baby tightly when I lost my balance.
At the hospital, I found that my right wrist was injured. I felt dizzy and nauseous. I went home, and bowed in front of Master's portrait. I thanked Master for protecting us, and said to him, “I have not done well in cultivation. I've been slacking off, and got busy in everyday people's affairs. The evil took advantage of my loopholes. That is why the accident happened today.” I promised Master that I would do better in cultivation.
My right wrist was broken and was very painful. I read the Fa and sent forth righteous thoughts. My sister wanted to buy some medicine for me. I told her not to bother. As a cultivator, I knew that I would be okay soon.
A few days later, my whole arm and hand were swollen, and even the skin became black. My son wanted to take me to the hospital. I refused. “Since I am a cultivator, I should trust my Master and the Fa. I will be fine. Don't worry,” I told him.
I practiced the exercises and read the Fa every day, as if nothing happened. I also made truth-clarification materials and did the housework. I recovered in less than 30 days. I again witnessed the power of Dafa.
With Master's help, I have set up a printing site, where I produce truth clarification materials, at my house, and I got involved in a couple of Dafa projects. However, I'm still a bit fearful about persecution. Also, I sometimes cannot control myself and fail to conduct myself as cultivator when I run into conflicts with others. I promise that I will study the Fa more diligently, do well what a practitioner should do, and solidly cultivate myself.
Please correct me with compassion if there is anything wrong with my understanding.
Thank you, Master; thank you, fellow practitioners.