(Minghui.org) I had many thoughts and feelings after reading “Fa Teaching on World Falun Dafa Day.” Lately, I've slackened off in my cultivation. Although I knew that this was not the right state to be in, I was very worried because I couldn't find the energy to change. I became apathetic about my state of cultivation, and didn't realize why I was in that state until Master enlightened me with his latest lecture.
In his latest lecture, Master again spoke emphatically about the problem of becoming slack in one's cultivation. I realized that “time” itself is a test or obstacle for us. Whether we can persist in doing something as well as we did in the beginning, over a seemingly endless period of time, that in itself is a test of a cultivator's will. Although the time we have seems to be endless and trouble-free, however, it is also the most difficult test that truly tempers the will. Only those who can overcome it can become gods!
When I consider my own cultivation, I realized that it's just as Master pointed out: it is as though I have become too familiar, and have lost my initial enthusiasm. Whether it is doing the three things or cultivating myself, as time passed and things became less difficult, my life became very routine. Without realizing it, I slackened off and became more apathetic, and no longer had a sense of urgency. When I looked within, I realized that I still did not fully appreciate how priceless cultivation is, and so in the fog of everyday life and the endless passage of time, I had slackened off without realizing it.
Whenever I did something or took part in an activity, I was always full of enthusiasm at the beginning, and I could persist in it for some time as I was fueled by passion and the novelty of the situation. But after some time, when the novelty wore off, I gradually began to slacken. In the past, I didn't understand why my cultivation state would improve for a while, but would drop back down again after that.
Now I understand: over time, my will to cultivate had been completely worn away, and I didn't have the long-term diligence for cultivation.
It also reflected another problem I had: I had been too hasty and slipshod in my cultivation, and I hadn't been steadfast and conscientious. When I am involved in an activity, and I start getting bored, I would stop thinking of persisting in that activity and start thinking of doing other things.
And when I seek out other activities to do, I am looking for that sense of novelty and passion. When I found that novelty and passion, it would help me persist in the activity for some time, but I would become apathetic and passive again as soon as the novelty wore off.
In the past, I never quite understood what other practitioners meant when they said they “felt lonely.” I am busy with work the whole day, and don't feel lonely at all! But after reading Master's lecture, I now understand that repeatedly doing something for a seemingly endless period of time is also a kind of suffering and loneliness. When one can steadfastly and conscientiously persist in doing what one should do, that is truly remarkable!
I recall Master's Fa,
“The more hopeless things may seem, it’s possible hope will appear right before your eyes. Especially during those times when you are feeling so bored, perhaps you are in fact establishing your mighty virtue.” (“What is a Dafa Disciple”)
When I came to understand this point, I felt really grateful to Master for his benevolent salvation, and for helping me unravel a problem that had troubled me for a long time.
Recently, something that happened close to home had a deep impact on me. There is an elderly practitioner in our area who has been experiencing severe illness karma for a long time (she has an open sore on her chest that's been leaking pus and fluid for a long time).
But no matter how much pain she was in, she continuously persisted in doing the things that a Dafa disciple should do, and doing as much as she could. Last Chinese New Year, our materials production site ran out of some material for printing calendars for distribution, and the practitioners running the production site were too busy to obtain more materials.
When this elderly practitioner heard about it, she traveled to a distant place to obtain the required materials. Last winter, when it was snowing so hard that it was impossible to walk, she still persisted in going out and doing Dafa activities. She really suffered and sacrificed a lot through her illness karma. But no matter how hard it was, she continuously and silently persisted, and her faith in Master and the Fa never wavered.
One day, she found that her hair was turning from white to black, and her teeth were growing back. Now, although this practitioner's illness karma isn't completely gone, all the practitioners who have seen her say that she looks much better. This is Master's enormous encouragement to her and to the practitioners around her.
A few days ago, I was talking to fellow practitioners about what was the most important thing in cultivation, and we concluded that it is having 100 percent faith in Master! Through this elderly practitioner, I have witnessed what it means to have persistent faith in Master and the Fa, and that is the essence of cultivation.
Before, whenever I ran into difficulties, I would often have negative thoughts such as “What am I going to do? This is so difficult.” I would feel there was no hope, and my heart would sink to its lowest point. I no longer felt like persisting.
But this practitioner's experience made me start thinking hard. I just haven't had that absolute faith in Master, and when I run into difficulties I would always worry about my future. I believe that only by having absolute faith in Master can we rise above a difficult test with righteous thoughts, confidence, and persistence, and only then can we see hope.
It is just like that practitioner, who, in the face of very real and very enormous pain and suffering, nevertheless maintained an enduring and unwavering diligence to cultivate. That is righteous faith and righteous thoughts. That is a steadfast attitude in cultivation, and is the most fundamental thing a cultivator should have.
I believe that, while we may not be able to enlighten to the Fa-principles immediately when we are in a difficult test, if we maintain a righteous and unwavering faith in our cultivation, we will be able to make it! Master said:
“But there is a point I want to make: No matter what, have righteous thoughts and act righteously, and there will be no test that you cannot pass. Even if things do get very grave and you don't know where your own problem lies, you can't be without righteous thoughts. No matter what the circumstances, your fundamental faith in Dafa cannot waver, because when [your faith remains strong], even if you can't fully understand something or you haven't done something well and didn't pass a major test, or even if you lost your human body and left this world, you will nevertheless achieve Consummation. (Applause) That's because Master does not acknowledge this persecution, and that thing was done to you by the persecution. So you must make sure to heed this.” (“Teaching the Fa in San Francisco, 2005”)
I am truly grateful to Master for his compassionate reminder and enlightenment, at a time when I have slackened in my cultivation. I will do my utmost to repay Master's salvation!
Please kindly point out any errors I have made.
Category: Improving Oneself
