(Minghui.org) I felt very sick in January 2012, so my husband took me to a hospital. I was diagnosed with late stage ovarian cancer, which had spread to my lymphatic system, peritoneum, and around my lungs.
The doctor told my husband that there was no cure and asked him to take me home.
My husband was in despair and had no clue what to do. When my sister heard about it, she told me that Falun Dafa could make a difference in my life—but that it was only my decision if I wanted to practice it.
She was diagnosed with breast cancer in 1999 and recovered after she started to practice Falun Dafa.
She had given me a copy of Zhuan Falun, the main book of Falun Dafa, in 1998, but it took me a long time to read it. The only understanding I gained at the time was that it told people how to be good. I did practice the exercises on and off
After the persecution started, I did not really cultivate even though my sister encouraged me and urged me to be diligent. Instead, I indulged myself in ordinary people's desires, and sometimes I behaved worse than an ordinary person. I laughed at my sister in my heart because I thought that life was meaningless without ordinary people's enjoyments.
After my sister left, I thought seriously about my life, and it flashed through my mind like a movie. Human beings are so small and powerless before Mother Nature. I was happy and energetic before, but now I had an incurable cancer. I had wasted over 10 years, during which time I thought I was happy.
I regretted having wasted so much time. I knelt down in front of Master's photo and cried. I said that I was very sorry and that I would be diligent from now on.
I looked at Master's photo and he seemed to smile. I could not believe it. I rubbed my eyes and looked at Master again. Yes, indeed, Master smiled.
I knew Master had not given up on me and that he had forgiven me. I knew I could practice again.
Every day I got up early to do the exercises, send righteous thoughts, and read the Dafa books and Master's articles.
My sister gave me the tools to break through the Chinese regime's Internet blockade, so I could read articles on the Minghui website. I read Master's new articles the minute they were published and also what overseas practitioners were doing. Through the Minghui platform, I learned from practitioners experience sharing.
My health improved and I no longer lost my temper. It made my husband support my cultivation wholeheartedly
My sister asked me to help her mail Dafa truth-clarifying letters and distribute Falun Dafa materials. Then she said that Master talked of the importance of Dafa materials production sites in China and wondered if we could set one up.
We bought a printer and a DVD burner. With the help of local practitioners, we learned how to burn DVDs and print materials. We tried to produce high quality materials and to produce as many as we could distribute.
When practitioners said that I had good enlightenment quality and was almost as good as the veteran practitioners, I felt good and satisfied with myself. I felt I was better than others and more capable. As a result, I looked down on other practitioners and was competitive.
It bothered me when practitioners pronounced some of the words incorrectly when studying the Fa. I scorned those who did not hold their hands correctly when sending forth righteous thoughts and wondered why they did that after so many years of cultivating.
In my mind, I laughed at practitioners when they talked about this and that attachment. Yet I became jealous when they exhibited better enlightenment quality.
There were so many more attachments that came from sentiment, which included lust, validating myself, pride in my son, and wanting to be the center of attention at holidays and other activities.
Those attachments were hidden deep down in my heart, and I never mentioned them around fellow practitioners. Actually, I wanted to live an ordinary person's life.
Master gave me a hint when he saw that my cultivation state was not good: One day I fell down on the same spot twice. It was then that I finally realized I had a problem, but I just could not figure out what it was.
I was weak and started to feel sick in January 2014. I did not have any strength in my limbs and could not breathe properly. I knew that I was being interfered with by the old forces, so I sent forth righteous thoughts to clear it away. I knew I should not acknowledge it.
I did not tell my husband because I did not want him to worry. But when he found out, he wanted me to see a doctor. I refused to go and explained that it was not an illness but interference from the old forces, and that I would not acknowledge it.
For non-practitioners, this situation is difficult to understand, and he thought that I was just being obstinate. He asked my sister and some good friends to persuade me to go to the hospital. I still refused.
A practitioner from another area visited my sister at that time and told her about my situation. The moment I saw the practitioner, I knew that the meeting was arranged by Master: This practitioner came to help me. She was a veteran practitioner and was clear on the Fa principles.
We studied the Fa together, which helped me dig out some of my attachments. I came to realize that one was demonic interference from my own mind.
For my husband's sake, I went to the hospital.
A scan showed that I had pleural effusion, which is excess fluid in the space that surrounds the lungs. A large quantity of fluid was taken out, and the doctor told my husband that I was in serious condition.
I knew it was illusory, so I did not acknowledge it. The old forces tried to drag me down.
I knelt down in front of Master's photo. “Master, I'm sorry for not doing well,” I said. “The old forces took advantage of my loopholes. I am not afraid of death, but I cann't die because there is still so much to do and so many sentient beings to be saved. Since many people need to hear the facts about Dafa, I will cultivate diligently going forward.”
I spent hours studying the Fa and doing the exercises, and I measured my thoughts and actions with the Fa principles. I sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate my thought karma, desires, and lust.
I was soon discharged from the hospital. My husband was overjoyed when he saw me improve. He said, “Dafa is really wonderful. Make sure you practice more diligently.”
He now studies the Fa with me for an hour-and-a-half every night. He also recites poems from Hong Yin and distributes Falun Dafa materials with me at night.
When I study the Fa more, I understand the Fa principles more deeply. As soon as an attachment comes up, I recognize it and send forth righteous thought to eliminate it.
Thank you, Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners! Special thanks to my sister for your great help.