(Minghui.org) I've always been shy. Soon after I began practicing Falun Dafa I moved out of town, so I had very few opportunities to interact with other practitioners. Because I was busy working I frequently forgot to study the Fa teachings, and I gradually began to drift away from cultivation. I was also attached to enjoying myself and living comfortably.
I was arrested and taken to a forced labor camp. I was frightened, gave in to the intense pressure, and renounced my faith. To console myself, I used the excuse of not being attached to consummation. However, compassionate Master never gave up on me, and in my darkest hours in the labor camp, I met several practitioners. Their firm belief in Dafa helped me return to cultivation.
Inspired by Other Practitioners
When I first arrived at the labor camp, my behavior and mindset were no different from an ordinary person's. One day I met another practitioner who had attended Master’s classes three times.
She told me that, during one class, Master shook the students' hands. I asked, “What were you thinking at that time?” She said, “I did not think of anything. When I looked at Master, I had no distracting thoughts. Time seemed to stand still.” When she said this, I remembered Master's words, “Bathed in divine light, conduct and thought become right.” (Zhuan Falun)
She described how she had already been persecuted. She was taken to a mental hospital and given psychotropic drugs. When she spit them out, her saliva burned the concrete floor. However, she was not affected. Listening to her, I was moved by Master's great compassion and how miraculous Dafa is!
I felt greatly encouraged after listening to her, and I remembered the teachings I had read. I realized that I had been merely suppressing my attachments because of my introverted character. I realized that I should honestly cultivate and stop hiding my attachments.
I met a practitioner in her 60s who told me that she had almost died when her tormentors tried to suffocate her with wet towels. Even though she was nearly illiterate, she could recite many of Master's teachings. She memorized the Fa by listening to others read. She could recite all of Hong Yin. When we were doing hard labor, we often recited Hong Yin. We could always count on her correcting us if we forgot a sentence. Her pure heart towards Dafa and Master inspired me tremendously. Even the guards no longer bothered trying to “transform” her because they knew it would be a waste of time.
Another practitioner had memorized a great deal of the Fa teachings. She wrote down Master’s new lectures and passed them to other practitioners. The guards couldn't figure it out, because they thoroughly searched every practitioner. Sometimes they waited until the practitioners took baths and then searched their belongings.
The camp guards finally asked this practitioner, “Where are you hiding the articles? How did you bring them in?” The practitioner pointed to her head and said, “They are all in here!” Her reply left the guards speechless. I admired her courage and enthusiasm despite our horrible surroundings.
Stepping Back Onto the Path of Cultivation
After I returned home from the forced labor camp, a fellow practitioner helped me write a solemn statement and send it to the Minghui website to nullify any agreements I'd made while I was detained. I used my real name to invalidate anything I'd said or done that did not conform to Dafa. I also used my real name to withdraw from the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its youth organizations. I've finally resumed practicing Falun Dafa.
Master said:
"Of course, we don't acknowledge any of the things that the old forces arranged--I as your master don't acknowledge them, and Dafa disciples of course don't acknowledge them either." (“Teaching the Fa at the 2004 Chicago Conference” from Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IV)
It has not been easy for me to come back to cultivation. However, I firmly believe in Master and Dafa, and I can feel Master watching over me.
I will never forget the practitioners I met while I was detained. Remembering them encourages me to advance quickly and to reject the temptations of everyday life. I'm now truly motivated to study the Fa diligently.
