(Minghui.org) I first became aware of my ego when I helped coordinate the Global RTC Platform. During one discussion, I started each sentence with “I” without thinking much about it.
Just as I was feeling pleased with myself, a practitioner from Thailand asked, “Why so many 'I's'?” It had never occurred to me that I had an attachment to self.
Through studying the Fa, I started to see how my attachment to self manifested. I had so many notions and attachments, such as to pride, reputation, feeling superior to others, jealousy, and competitiveness. I realized that all these came from this one attachment–self.
I always had too much pride, even when I was very young. I remember crying because my math teacher pointed out my mistake in front of the entire class. After my father slapped me, I didn't call him “Dad” for more than ten years.
Another time, my mom and older sister came to my school to bring me some roasted sweet potatoes. A classmate commented, “Oh, it’s sweet potatoes. I thought they were apples.” I was so embarrassed that I told my mom to never come to my school again.
Because I grew up in communist China, I was never taught traditional values, such as considering others first. My attachment to ego was amplified even more by the Chinese Communist Party's (CCP) atheist education. If I hadn't begun practicing Falun Dafa, these notions and attachments would have controlled me even more and caused me to accumulate more karma.
Eliminating My Attachment to Self While Promoting Shen Yun
Shen Yun comes to our region every year, providing local practitioners opportunities to work and cooperate with each other. I have participated in promoting Shen Yun Performing Arts since 2014 and have experienced firsthand how my abilities expanded when I let go of my ego.
I was not confident in my driving ability, as my sense of direction was not good. However, to help with Shen Yun promotion, I had to drive quite a lot. This helped to lessen my fear of driving. My driving skills and sense of direction improved each year. I was also able to get rid of much of my pride, arrogance, jealousy, hatred, and many other terrible thoughts that harmed both myself and others.
Ability Increases When Attachments Are Removed
A coordinator asked me to translate congratulatory letters and welcome letters from local politicians this year. I managed to translate nine letters in one night. The speed and quality at which I worked far exceeded my abilities.
I sat in front of the computer and worked for seven hours straight. My mind was clear, and the writing flowed. Before I sent them off, I read my translations over and over again and made edits until I was happy with every word.
The only thought I had was to do a good job and do it quickly. I was not trying to show off at all. Master must have seen my pure heart and thus strengthened me.
Category: Improving Oneself
