(Minghui.org) I have been practicing Falun Dafa for nearly 21 years. I have experienced both joy and sadness, and have had many insights. I would like to share my experiences with you.
One summer morning in 2011, another practitioner and I went to the countryside to pass out truth clarification materials. Just as we were finishing up at around 6:30 a.m., someone reported us to the police. The police chased us and the other practitioner was taken. Riding my motorcycle at a very high speed, I escaped the police, but I ran off the road. I hit the ground hard and passed out.
Another group of practitioners who were also passing out materials saw the accident. They later told me that I was severely injured. There was a lot of blood on the ground, and my face was almost completely destroyed. They tried to stop a few taxis, but the drivers refused to take me to the hospital, because they thought I would die in their cars. The practitioners paid a high price and found a car.
I regained consciousness briefly in the car. My first reaction was, “This is what dying must feel like.” Then I heard a sentence from the car radio, “You have experienced a lot of difficulties. You have a solid foundation...” I felt that it was Master encouraging me. I thought, “I need to hold on and I will be fine.”
Eva (alias, a practitioner) was holding me and kept wiping the blood from my mouth. I passed out again. The second time I woke up, I thought, “I need to stay with Jenny (alias).” I know Jenny (also a practitioner) very well. I told the other practitioners and I passed out again.
When I woke up a few hours later, I was in Jenny's home. The first thing I saw was Master's portrait on the wall. I thought, “I am with Master now. I'm fine now.” I saw Eva and her child sending forth righteous thoughts. They asked me how I felt. I said that I was fine.
I was actually severely injured. My head was swollen. My face was covered in sand and blood. The flesh above my right eyebrow protruded. My upper lip had a big cut and the inner flesh hung out. The connective tissue between the lower lip and gum was broken. My tongue had split into two pieces. Two lower front teeth were missing. I could not open my eyes—as soon as I opened them I felt dizzy and the room began spinning. I kept vomiting blood.
One practitioner later told me, “I was so frightened when I first saw you. Your face was destroyed, and you were covered in blood. I was the one who found you. You were unconscious. I wasn't sure if you were still alive. But I noticed you were still breathing.”
I tried to get up to use the bathroom. They asked if I could go by myself. I nodded. Once there, however, I could not walk out. The practitioners carried me out, and I vomited black blood. It was probably caused by injured organs. I didn't feel any pain. After I vomited, I was able to open my eyes.
Jenny arranged for many practitioners to come and send forth righteous thoughts for me. Her apartment was packed.
On the second morning, Jenny asked if I could do the exercises. I said yes. But I only had the energy to do the first set. She let me do everything that I was able to do. I also forced myself to carry on as though I were not injured. I cooked rice cereal and made myself swallow it. At the beginning, I asked practitioners to read the Fa to me. I could not sit up for long, so I lay down after a while and listened to them. A week later, I was able to read the Fa myself for 30 minutes.
Two weeks later, my condition improved and I returned to my own apartment.
The right side of my face was badly swollen and hard. Blood and a foul-smelling liquid kept oozing from my mouth. I increased the length of time that I read the teachings and sent forth righteous thoughts. My condition kept improving. After two months, I was almost recovered, except for my face. Ten months later, my face looked normal. Because my tongue was split down the middle, I could not speak clearly at first. My tongue also could not taste or feel anything. It later returned to normal.
Everybody was amazed that I survived. My family members and friends, who are not practitioners, all thought I was dying for sure. But my life was renewed by the Fa. My life is given by Master. I know very well Master's careful arrangements, and how he is protecting me.
I know that my solid belief in Master and the Fa was why I survived this big tribulation. I also realized the cause of the tribulation was that I didn't truly cultivate myself, and the notions and attachments I had accumulated. I deeply saw the importance of solid cultivation.
My husband does not cultivate. He is narrow-minded, insecure, and an alcoholic. Everybody has a hard time being with him. Since everybody around us looks down on him, I looked down on him too. I often pointed out his problems. He once left me and rented an apartment. We almost divorced. The only reason we stayed together was because of our child. Before my motorcycle accident, I had hatred, jealousy, and competitive feelings toward him.
Master said,
“Another thing to bring up is that, as Dafa disciples, you need to pay attention to things in your daily life. As you know, improper relations between people who aren’t husband and wife is a sin for human beings; it undermines the institution of the family as well as ethical relations. Before, in the early stage, I had already detected this problem. Namely, that while cultivating in ordinary human society, the greatest challenges are the sexual temptations posed by ordinary society when the world is in disarray. The requirements for such things used to be extremely strict for cultivators. No matter what practice it was, this was taken very seriously. In the past, if someone who had taken up the robe violated the ordinances on such things, it would spell the end of his cultivation. And if some immortal was guiding a disciple’s cultivation in the mountains and the disciple made this mistake, it would mean he was ruined forever. It is something that serious. You are Dafa disciples who cultivate in the Great Law, making what you do even more sacred, yet some students have paid so little heed to it. It shouldn’t matter what the prevailing values are in today’s human world or how people regard such things: a cultivator needs to have high standards and look at such matters with a higher set of principles, holding himself to the requirements of gods. Even here among humans improper sexual relations is criminal. A divine being would never do something so filthy. And aren’t cultivators on the path to divinity? Are cultivators not walking a divine path? Why can’t you act like a divine being, then? Why can’t you act in line with the requirements for a divine being? How could it be that some people keep repeating the same mistake? Could that ever be acceptable?” (“Fa Teaching Given in Manhattan,” Collected Fa Teaching Vol. X)
I felt like Master was talking about me. The accident was a wake-up call, and I had many realizations because of it. My negative notions had accumulated for a long time, however, and were really hard to get rid of. Sometimes I managed to do better. One of my notions was that I believed that I did “important things.” I considered everything else, especially any family matters, as trivial and even interference. Because of this I had pushed away many cultivation opportunities. My thoughts were not in line with the Fa. This is because I didn't study the Fa well, so I didn't treat the family environment as an environment for cultivation.
Gradually, I changed my attitude toward my husband. I endured his insulting comments. When he cursed me, I quietly said, “Falun Dafa is good; Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good.” I started to pay more attention to him. Sometimes Master used his mouth to encourage me, “You're behaving better today.” My husband also noticed the changes in me.
He wanted to buy a car. Since he is an alcoholic, I asked him to quit drinking. He was unhappy. Our child didn't want him to buy a car either for safety reasons. Later, I thought that the Fa requires practitioners to consider others. So, I changed my mind and supported his decision. When I honestly told him my thoughts, he changed too, and said, “I'm getting old, and I drink too much. So, I don't think buying a car is a good idea.”
I sensed the amazing power of cultivation. I also know that I still need to improve in the family environment. I'm confident that I will do better and better.
I used to be picky and difficult when other practitioners asked me to do things. I always dismissed their suggestions. I didn't look inward. When I started to correct myself with the Fa, I became happier. I knew that I was improving.
Once when the other practitioners and I made truth-clarifying materials, one practitioner suggested how to fold the material, how to post the tags, and how to seal the bags, etc. To me these were all trivial details. In the old days, I would have felt that she was causing trouble, and other human notions would have come out. But this time I reminded myself that she wanted everything to look good to have the best effect of saving people. So, I accepted her suggestions unconditionally.
Later I read Master's teaching,
“A Dafa disciple’s righteous thoughts stem from the Fa, and your cultivation is not a matter of how good, as a human being, your ideas are or how brilliant your approach is. Rather, your cultivation is a matter of whether you manage to have righteous thoughts in the face of challenges.” (“Be More Diligent,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. X)
I was happy. I told that practitioner about my enlightenment. She was also happy and felt enlightened too.
Although it seemed like a small thing, I took it seriously. I know nothing is coincidental in cultivation. Everything is carefully arranged by Master. If we look outward we may miss cultivation opportunities arranged by Master. Now I see my problems, and I truly thank Master and fellow practitioners.
A practitioner in my area always broke her promises and didn't behave like a practitioner. I was not moved by her behavior when I did things with her. I told myself, “This is an opportunity for me to look at myself and cultivate, since Master let me see her behavior. This is Master asking me to find my own problems.” I also told myself to separate her behavior at the surface human level from her true self.
When my thoughts became righteous, she changed too. Before, many practitioners had negative attitudes towards her because of the way she behaved. Now they are happy for her. This is cultivation, It was Dafa that changed her.
I always thought that I didn't do well in cultivation, so I never wrote or submitted any cultivation articles during the China Fa Conference. This time, I want to express my heartfelt appreciation to Master for saving my life and renewing it. I see this opportunity to submit my article as a new starting point in my cultivation.