(Minghui.org) Greetings, esteemed Master and fellow practitioners:
I am a Falun Dafa (also called Falun Gong) practitioner, and began to practice Dafa in 1998. I have been cultivating under Master’s protection for over 21 years.
When obtaining Falun Dafa, I was a post-graduate student. Qigong is mainly taught in Mainland China. One of my teachers was highly interested in qigong, mainly due to supernormal abilities. He often talked about the supernormal phenomenon of qigong in class. Therefore, I got interested in qigong and often thought about the meaning of my life.
Then, I read the book Zhuan Falun online, and many of my questions about the meaning of life and the phenomenon of supernormal abilities were answered. I found the Falun Dafa website and read all of Master's lectures. This prepared me to step on the cultivation path.
Soon after I obtained Dafa, due to the physical discomfort, I went to a hospital for a check-up. I had the shock of my life, as I was diagnosed with malignant tumors in my kidneys. Doctors dealt with my right kidney. While I was pushed into the operating room to have my left kidney's tumor removed, I told the doctor not to remove my kidney. He got mad, and I was taken out of the operating room.
When I did the exercises at the practice site, I wondered why I had to face all these tribulations. I know I wanted to be cured. When studying the Fa, I was thinking about my illness, and when doing the exercises, I was also thinking about my illness. Even when I clarified the truth about Dafa, I was thinking about my illness.
Master said,
“Human beings acquire many notions in this world and are, as a consequence, driven by these notions to pursue what they yearn for.” (“Toward Consummation,” Essentials for the Further Advancement II)
I realized that being cured was my fundamental attachment. I was stuck in the attachment of being cured for a long time. It’ so difficult to elevate – even just one step forward. Even though I was a cultivator, I cultivated to be cured – which made me a sham cultivator.
Then, I kept asking myself, why are you cultivating? What is the meaning of your life? I realized that in order to let go of attachments, it is essential for me to deepen my understanding of the Fa. When ordinary people pass away, they only take their accumulated virtue and karma with them, while cultivators gong (higher energy) with them. Slowly I came to understand, that if I wanted to go to heaven, I needed to elevate my xinxing and eliminate karma. In Fa study, I slowly let go of my fundamental attachments.
After some years I went to the hospital for another check-up. The doctor did not expect me to be healthy. I said that I practiced Falun Gong. Then he said, "Oh, maybe we made a mistake in the diagnosis."
When I first obtained Dafa, I believed that cultivation is about being a good person. Master’s lecture is telling us to be a good person. However, only after joining the Fa-study group did I look inward and find a lot of my attachments. I wondered how could I have so many attachments.
I started to admire and depend on the assistant who talked well and was a good guide for practitioners to clarify the truth. I felt that I was not even close to many of the practitioners I came across, given my many attachments – I truly felt inferior. Until one day that assistant cultivator whom I admired a lot, suddenly lost his temper and yelled at me, which really hurt my feelings. Afterward, I kept thinking about what was going on. He talks so well about the Fa, it shouldn’t be like this.
I looked inward and realized that it was my attachments of admiration and dependency. I knew that I had to elevate myself in the Fa, and not to admire or depend on anyone else.
Master said,
“If you do not want to change your human state and rationally rise to a true understanding of Dafa, you will miss the opportunity. If you do not change the human logic that you, as an ordinary human, have formed deep in your bones over thousands of years, you will be unable to break away from this superficial human shell and reach Consummation.” (“Cautionary advice,” Essentials for the Further Advancement)
I came to realize that Master is teaching us to jump out of human notions, human concepts, and view and think about the universe, human body, and time and space from the perspective of Gods. I realized that the reflection for ordinary people is essentially different from the looking-inward of practitioners. However, for a cultivator to look inward is to walk toward the path of a divine being. When I found attachments, it was because of my understanding of the Fa. In the process of studying Fa and looking inward, we continually jump out of human thinking and human concepts, so we can let go of attachments. It lets us see things from a higher-level perspective.
I joined the Epoch Times when it began to deliver the newspaper daily instead of weekly. The conflicts and tribulations experienced at the Epoch Times were tests for me to let go of my attachments.
A new practitioner, not long after he graduated from the University, joined my division. Not long after, he said that he wanted to resign. I asked why, and he complained about me and others, and much more. I thought that he had too many complaints and negative thoughts, so I wouldn’t be able to manage him. It’s probably better for him to leave for some more training at an ordinary firm. I didn’t want to keep him.
Afterward, many colleagues including supervisors asked him why he wanted to resign. He again had many complaints, but he was not let go. He left my division and talked a lot about how it was working for me, and I felt bad.
Master said,
“If someone kicks me while I’m walking down the street and no one around knows me, I can tolerate it." I say that this is not good enough. Perhaps in the future you may be slapped in the face twice, and you will lose face in front of someone whom you least want to see it. It is to see how you will deal with this issue and whether you can endure it. If you can tolerate it and yet it preys on your mind, it is still not good enough.” (Lecture Nine, Zhuan Falun)
I looked inward and found my attachment to fame, and losing face. To let go of attachments, we must elevate in the Fa during Fa study – to let go bit by bit. I tried to keep the Fa inside my mind to turn the big things into small ones.
Master said,
“It has been said: "When I come to this ordinary human society, it’s just like checking into a hotel for a few days. Then I leave in a hurry." Some people are just obsessed with this place and have forgotten their own homes.” (Lecture Nine, Zhuan Falun)
Then I told myself that I'm only a short while in this mundane world – time is short, so my attachments need to be let go of bit by bit.
When I looked deeper I realized that I did let go of some attachments, but still I have not yet mentally calmed down. I thought that he just graduated, does that qualify him to say anything about me. I realized that I held the attachment to jealousy. I looked inward to find my jealousy.
Master said,
“Things have been arranged for such a long time and this is such a major event, so things are really well-ordered! If I told you that even every step you take as you walk, and that even how big your stride is, were arranged, you might not believe it.” (“Fa Teaching given at 2014 San Francisco Fa Conference”)
This Fa shocked me, because I realized that even every step you take was arranged, whatever abilities or profession one holds was arranged – everything in our life was arranged. Human beings can only follow the arranged scripts to play their role, No one in God’s eyes is higher, or lower. They are all playing different roles. Thinking of this, the jealousy in my heart started to dissolve. I reminded myself often, all of this is nothing but movies, running according to the arranged scripts.
Looking inward deeper I realized that I had to find my deficiencies. He said that I often spent too much time on Facebook at work. It was true. I used to manage the Epoch Times Facebook, but I got addicted to it. I use it to clarify the truth, but I spent too much time on Facebook.
When searching within, I realized that I often felt sleepy, sometimes even fell asleep during Fa study, or when sending righteous thoughts. I even fell asleep when doing the meditation exercise. I realized that it’s related to my being addicted to surfing the internet, resulting in a lot of interference. Therefore, I decided to constrain myself and to adjust my daily schedule. I also spent more time to send righteous thoughts. Later my situation was getting better, and I was able to study the Fa and exercise without interference.
I was still feeling awkward facing him, I looked deeper and realized a fearful heart within myself, I stopped talking to that person after conflicts, in order to avoid any more conflicts, and protect myself from being hurt. I needed to make a breakthrough, as I needed his help to solve a work-related problem.
The lesson I learned is when facing conflicts, I need to look inward and elevate my xinxing. I also need the courage to face conflicts and not to see fellow practitioners with a fixed perspective, as everyone is cultivating. Only then can everything change.
This September's 29 Taiwan-HK grand parade was an activity organized by ordinary people, with the topic to support Hong Kong (HK). The Epoch Times printed 60,000 special editions with the topic of “Heaven will Eliminate the CCP,” The protest in HK was originally for the Anti-Extradition Law Amendment Bill Movement. Yet, more and more people were posting the slogan “Heaven will Eliminate the CCP.” God is warning us that the critical moment is approaching.
That day I was in charge of interviews. We interviewed a farmer from ChangHwa. He brought a truck full of dragon fruits free of charge for all the participants in the parade. He said that Taiwan's people were awakening through this play in HK where police would beat up the elderly and teenagers. "God bless Taiwan. We are all awakening." He was just an ordinary person, but he could be so clear-headed, it was extraordinary. The incident in HK is a play, arranged for Taiwanese people to watch with the hope that those CCP believers would awaken from their illusion.
Master said,
“Human society is merely operating in accordance with changes in the celestial phenomena. The history of the past is continually repeating itself, and today’s history is a repetition and a revision of an earlier history.” (Teaching the Fa at the Conference in Houston)
I realized that HK events were also arranged. It seems that the HK people are being oppressed, but in fact, it’s to show the whole world how evil the CCP is, and they need to be rescued to establish a good foundation for their bright future. It’s a play that was arranged a long time ago. Dafa practitioners should not be moved--we should take this chance to save more sentient beings and clarify the truth to awaken more people.
The Fa-rectification period is nearing its end. I hope we can all be more diligent in our cultivation and do the three things well.
(Presented at the 2019 Taiwan Fa Conference)