(Minghui.org) My son was born after I left China, and he's now seven years old. He can recognize 80% of the Chinese characters in Zhuan Falun. Compared to other Chinese children raised overseas, his Chinese is pretty good. When we attended group Fa study, however, he reads very slowly and he couldn't keep up with the practitioners who grew up in China. I feel that many Chinese parents face this issue so I'd like to share my experience.
In order to improve his Chinese, I relied on the Chinese class at Minghui School. After I looked into an education program I had an idea. The developer doesn't start with Pinyin (simplified Chinese), instead, she has students learn Chinese characters directly and then has them repeatedly memorize the characters.
I read a paragraph with my child each day until he became familiar with it. We discuss the meaning of each character, and then share our understanding based on the Fa. It takes a long time to memorize each paragraph; a single paragraph takes an hour and then we check each other. I write down some characters on a note pad so that he can memorize them later.
While he repeatedly read Zhuan Falun I read with him, so he wouldn't feel lonely. This gave me a better understanding of the Fa and I also memorized it. While he read I memorized and soon each character appeared before my eyes. Because he read Zhuan Falun so many times, he also memorized it.
During the process of memorizing the Fa, I noticed many of my attachments. I thought my child was a burden. I didn't have patience, and I had attachments to gain and wanted to get through Fa-study quickly. When my son first started to read he was very slow, and I got angry. Because I couldn't remain compassionate or calm I couldn't see the deeper meanings behind each character. Each time I became impatient or angry I regretted it.
While we read one day I saw the three characters, “relaxed, slow, and smooth”. I understood that Master gave me a hint to slow down in my Fa study. While my son read, I slowed down. The feeling of compassion and magnificence, which I hadn't experienced for a long time enveloped me. Afterwards, when I memorized the Fa each character appeared before my eyes.
Although I once again experienced the sacredness of studying the teachings it didn't always happen. Sometimes, my child wanted to negotiate with me in order to postpone his Fa-study, or to memorize less. I felt impatient and wanted to give up. I wanted our memorizing of the teachings to be something he looked forward to, and I didn't want to be an authoritarian parent.
While memorizing, I encouraged him to evaluate everything in his life from the standpoint of the teachings we were memorizing.
Like most children my son likes to watch cartoons, play with toys, or is a picky eater. Some parents force their kids to rid themselves of these things. I feel doing this would only be forcing children to strictly follow rules, and also crush their creativity. I try to be flexible.
I found that when he spends more time memorizing the Fa, my son has less time for entertainment. In addition, he automatically looks inward and corrects himself when he is memorizing the Fa.
I found that the process of guiding our children is also a process of cultivating ourselves. We can't force our wishes on our children. Master is taking care of them. Even though we are their parents we should remember our children are beings who have obtained the Fa and that we just need to fulfill our responsibilities towards them.