(Minghui.org) All practitioners think they believe in Master Li and Dafa. However, that belief will be tested by the test of life and death. How much we believe in Master and the Fa determines how well we do when we face tribulations.
I started to practice Falun Dafa in 1997. At that time, I was suffering from a number of ailments, especially heavy bleeding due to uterine fibroids. I knew my life was going to end soon. But I recovered in less than two months after I began to practice.
Master said,
“In the meantime, you should also suffer a little bit and endure some hardships to reduce your karma. You can then move up a little bit; that is, the characteristic of the universe will not restrict you as much.” (Lecture One, Zhuan Falun)
Master has eliminated most of our karma for us, and we have to eliminate the small bit that remains. Master has divided our karma into numerous small portions, placed them at different levels of our cultivation, and used them to improve our xinxing.
That made me realize that each tribulation is a test. It is a test of our belief in Master. Even if there is interference by the old forces, Master uses them and arranges them for our improvement. Master said,
“...go along with their ploys and turn their ploys against them “ (Fa-Lecture During the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference)
After I had been a cultivator for less than a year, I started to bleed heavily, like I used to. My understanding of the Fa was very superficial. I was surprised at first, and then I thought, “If I had not learned Dafa, I would have died a long time ago. So every day since was given to me by Master. Who cares about the bleeding.” I was not attached to the bleeding, and it stopped in a day. I later realized that I had let go of my concern over life and death and was not attached to the illusion of “illness.” This thought met the standard of my level at that time.
I set up a material production site in 2004 and was involved in different projects to awaken people’s conscience. I was busy until late every day, but I still studied the Fa no matter how busy I was.
When I was about to send forth righteous thoughts one night, I felt terribly dizzy. I had never felt like that before, and it reached the limit of my endurance. It was obvious that the old forces were bent on taking my life. I was not afraid and simply said in my heart, “Master, please help me.” My faith in Master was so solid that I was confident that Master would help me!
I also realized that I could not just wait for Master to help me. Laying down without doing anything was not cultivation. I tried my best to cross my legs and send forth righteous thoughts. I felt much better after about five minutes. I had recovered by the next morning.
I easily passed the test with no fear. That faith came from studying the Fa.
A few years ago, I came down with diarrhea. It didn’t worry me at first, but then it got worse. The pain in my stomach became unbearable. I was shaking and almost fainted. My husband noticed and asked, “What's wrong with you? You look pale.” I had never told my family when I experienced sickness karma to avoid unnecessary trouble. I tried to stay calm and told him I was fine. I wanted to call fellow practitioners to send righteous thoughts for me. I was afraid that if I fainted, my family would be frightened, and they might take me to the hospital when I was unconscious.
My sight blurry, with great effort, I picked up the phone and called several practitioners. I asked if they could come over to help with something but did not tell them what was going on. I called four practitioners, but none of them could come.
I had never asked any fellow practitioners to help send forth righteous thoughts when I had sickness karma before. Therefore, they did not expect that anything would happen to me. I did not blame them when they told me they could not come.
Surprisingly, everything returned to normal after I hung up the phone. I realized it was because I did not blame them when they could not help. I could be considerate of others at the critical moment.
I felt dizzy and could barely walk one day in 2018. My right eye seemed to be covered with a film, and I could not see clearly. I told myself it was an illusion and didn't take it seriously.
This lasted for several days. One day my celestial eye saw an evil being at the place of my right eye. I was a little bit scared.
I sent forth righteous thoughts, but my right eye and my head hurt more and more. I was nervous and called a fellow practitioner to come and help. She came and checked my right eye. She said that my right eyeball had shrunk. By then I could no longer see out of it. I was afraid.
We sent forth righteous thoughts until 10 p.m. The vision in my right eye returned gradually, but everything still looked blurry. I could not break through this state for a long time, and I did not know what my loophole was.
I found my loopholes only recently. First, I was in a bad state of cultivation at that time. I did not study the Fa well and did not do the exercises every day. This kept me from truly believing in Master and the Fa. I was unaware of my attachments in that state, such as resentment, fear, selfishness, jealousy, showing off, lust, and vanity. How could I have righteous thoughts with so many attachments?
Cultivation is extremely serious. The Fa measures our thoughts, speech, and deeds at different levels. I hope fellow practitioners can learn a lesson from me and do better. I hope all of us can cultivate as diligently as we did in the beginning. Let’s believe 100 percent in Master and continue to be diligent.