(Minghui.org) Totally unprepared, the world was suddenly hit with the coronavirus plague. Many fellow practitioners were shocked and could hardly eat and sleep for days.
When I told my father-in-law how the Chinese Communist Party covered up the truth of the plague and caused a lot of deaths, he refused to listen, just as he refused to learn about Falun Dafa in the past.
His action made me ponder what I didn't do well that may have resulted in his resistance. I began to search within.
Deep down, I discovered that I didn’t have adequate compassion towards sentient beings. I acknowledged the old forces' arrangement to eliminate those they deemed not good enough. I was also numb to the fact that so many have died of the virus. I remembered concurring with a fellow patron in a barbershop who said: “Nowadays, so many people turned wicked, let the elimination begin.” I even responded, “It [the elimination] is coming.”
When I had thoughts like this, how could the result be good?
In the early years of the persecution, when the police brutally tortured fellow practitioners in custody, we sent forth righteous thoughts to have the police receive retribution. We failed to help them understand why the persecution was wrong. Instead, we developed resentment and hatred towards them. We did not meet the Fa’s standard, and our compassion was not adequate to resolve the evil factors that manipulated the police. We were thus unable to save them.
When I saw some perpetrators still persecuting Falun Dafa practitioners after two decades, I would wonder why they had not met with the retribution yet. I thought retribution might help stop them from persecuting practitioners. But now I see that I had resentment and hatred towards the perpetrators. As a cultivator, I should have compassion towards the perpetrators because they are harming themselves and will be held accountable for their actions. I should have worked harder to help them stop their participation in the persecution.
I tended to walk away when people refused to listen to me talking about the persecution. Selfishly, I only thought about the safety of myself and missed so many opportunities to save people.
A former coworker and I were not on good terms. That was before I began practicing Falun Dafa. She later found a new job at another company. One day I went to her company and talked to her office mate about Falun Dafa. She reported me to the police after hearing what I had to say. I was almost arrested. I learned that she died of breast cancer later. I thought she met with retribution for what she did to me. Looking back, I felt really bad about being so selfish – she must have been a sentient being with predestined relationship with me, but I did not have enough compassion to reach out and save her.
Master said:
“And that’s all the more so during this persecution, yet instead of developing righteous thoughts, you have allowed a great deal of hatred to build up. The wicked CCP is indeed villainous, and in the near future it will surely be eliminated. But do you know what a bad person is and what a good person is? If your mind is filled with hatred and malice, think about it, everyone: what kind of a being would one be? And it will show in your conduct and even in your looks, and people will see evil in you.” (“Fa Teaching Given at the 2014 San Francisco Fa Conference”)
“...whoever opposes you would be cleared out, you’d make it through, and… not a single being would be left. If we were to do that all the way through, wouldn’t we have destroyed everything by the time we were done? Thus, Dafa disciples can only save sentient beings when they manage to walk their paths correctly. And only then, while saving beings, can you make it through. It’s that hard. This is what makes it so hard to save sentient beings. Some people who don’t know what they are talking about may say that they “want to save sentient beings,” but in fact have no idea what saving beings involves.” (“20th Anniversary Fa Teaching,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. XI)
While in the process of rescuing fellow practitioners, I knew on the basis of the Fa that we should save those sentient beings in the law enforcement and judiciary system. But when they behaved viciously and irrationally towards practitioners, we were quick to think they were un-savable.
I have since come to realize that those perpetrators are also sentient beings who have risked their lives coming down to the human world. They have entrusted Falun Dafa and its practitioners to save them when they got lost in the lies perpetuated by the Chinese Communist Party. I, however, allowed my fear to block me from doing my best to save them. Maybe there were many fellow practitioners like me, and our loopholes were taken advantage of by the evil to make the situation worse.
We have matured after years of cultivation. We know that when we truly understand the Fa, improve our xinxing, let go of our resentment and hatred, our righteous thoughts will emerge and we will be able to save people.
A neighbor was ordered to monitor me and my family. In order to get the reward money, he even reported me with fabricated claims. I did not resent him, but continued treating him and his family with compassion and bringing the awareness of the persecution to him.
One day, he came over with a hunched back. He told me that he received retribution for participating in the persecution – he fell from a moving vehicle. He felt fortunate to have survived after a surgery. He promised that he would never persecute Falun Gong practitioners again. I was very happy for him.
When I was sent to the labor camp the first time, I resented those guards. I thought they were so evil and should all be punished for what they did. Because I had no compassion towards them, I suffered the worst torture. My face was shocked with several electric batons and I was unrecognizable after the torture. When I was sent to the labor camp the second time, I no longer had hatred. I treated all of the guards with compassion. This time, the guards and a notorious team leader acted as if they had all changed – they treated me very well and nobody mistreated me.
Just like what Master taught us:
“The environment is shaped by your human attachments.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2009 Greater New York International Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IX)
Whenever I thought of those people who died of the Wuhan Coronavirus, my coworker who died of breast cancer, and those people that I gave up, I began crying. I felt sorry for them. It was because I did not cultivate myself well that they lost their lives. How could one assimilate to the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance without eliminating one’s selfishness first?
From now on, I will completely get rid of resentment and selfishness, as well as my attachments to fame, power, and benefit. I will also eliminate the evil factors that prevent us from saving sentient beings. The old forces are ruining people, and we cannot lag behind. It is high time to rescue and save people.
Let us cherish the time left, seize every minute, second, and walk the rest of the journey well.
This is my understanding at this juncture of time. Please kindly point out anything inappropriate.