(Clearwisdom.net) Greetings, Teacher! Greetings, fellow practitioners!
I have been practicing Falun Gong for 17 years, and truly feel incomparably fortunate and wonderful to be practicing. Since the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) began its suppression of Falun Gong, I have witnessed that the Buddha Fa is profound and boundless, and that Teacher has been infinitely compassionate towards practitioners. I would like to share some of my experiences.
Following Teacher on the Path to Find My True Self
When I graduated from college in 1983, I quickly found a job in a company and was soon promoted to a managerial position in the human resources department. I was later promoted to the factory office manager. Many people saw me as a promising young woman because of my achievements before the age of 30. But my good fortune did not last long.
In the winter of 1984, red rashes started appearing all over my body. I developed a high fever and my legs were so painful that I could not walk. After I was admitted to the hospital, the doctors realized that my body did not have enough healthy red blood cells, and a specialist diagnosed me with gout and rheumatoid nodules of erythema, a disease of the blood system. There was no effective treatment available, so the specialist put me on hormone treatment to keep it under control.
I was tormented by this illness for the next ten years, and had to take medication and dietary supplements nearly all the time. I was physically and mentally exhausted because of the illness. I became anxious, withdrawn, and I had a bad temper. Due to the medication, the valves in my heart became narrower. My stomach, intestines, and eyes were also affected, and I lost sight in my right eye at one point. They had to inject my right eye twice a week. The pain was unbearable. I later became disabled and lost a lot of weight. My job, career, and future were uncertain. My family, friends, and colleagues were very worried about me.
In May 1993, my illness deteriorated and I was bedridden for the entire summer. I tried western medicine, Chinese medicine, many therapies, and different forms of qigong. That summer I spent more than 10,000 yuan on medical expenses, and my employer had to pay 85% of the costs. I was forced to take early retirement in April 1994, even though I was not yet 40 years of age.
Fortunately, my life turned around in May 1994, when my husband's boss told me about Falun Gong. He presented me with a photo of Mr. Li Hongzhi, the founder of Falun Gong. The next day my husband went to a practice site and began to learn the exercises. He was ecstatic when he returned home and told me how wonderful the practice was. I said, “I am the sick one. Why are you practicing Falun Gong when you are perfectly healthy?” He replied, “Falun Gong is more than just treating one's illnesses! It teaches the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. It teaches people how to become better people.”
I woke up one night to find my husband practicing the sitting meditation. I was lying next to him and felt very comfortable and relaxed. The next morning I told him that I wanted to practice Falun Gong as well. I went to a practice site with my husband that evening. When the exercise music started, Teacher's words stirred my soul, and I felt very peaceful after finishing the exercises. However, when I went back home, I started to make my Chinese herbal medicine. In a few minutes, the mixture turned into a dark brown color. I thought I had overcooked it and so I threw it away. The next morning I made the herbal soup again. When I was about to drink it, it turned dark brown again. What was going on? I thought that the herbs had developed fungi, so I threw away all of the Chinese herbs. My husband then got a new batch of herbs, so I made a fresh soup. But the soup turned to dark brown again. I was speechless. Suddenly, I realized that it was a hint from Teacher that I no longer needed to take any medicine. I threw away both the herbal soup and the new herbs. Since that day, I have not taken any medication or herbs. My body has been purified by Teacher and I am now free of illness.
Several days later, my husband, daughter, and I left for Harbin City by train to attend Mr. Li Hongzhi's lectures. It was August 4, 1994. When the train began to move from the station, a fellow practitioner came over and told us that Mr. Li Hongzhi was also on the train, and suggested that we go and meet Him. She and my husband approached Teacher together. I told my daughter, “Let's stay here. It is impolite and disrespectful to bother Him.” However, I longed to meet the Teacher. I kept looking towards the direction of Mr. Li. Finally, I took my daughter and walked towards His seat. All of sudden Mr. Li Hongzhi looked up at me. I felt instantly refreshed and energized. It was the most memorable moment in my life.
I listened to Mr. Li Hongzhi giving the Fa lectures for nine days. I had previously fought hard over fame, power, and self-interest. I had lost myself and my health as a result. I grew up influenced by the CCP's atheist education and did not believe in religion. When Mr. Li Hongzhi imparted the Fa, my corrupted thoughts and notions were purged from within me, and the Teacher's Fa answered many of my questions on life.
Teacher said:
“As a human being, you are a good person only if you can follow this universe’s characteristic of Zhen-Shan-Ren. A person who deviates from this characteristic is truly a bad person. In the workplace or in society, some people may say that you are bad, yet you may not necessarily be bad. Some people may say that you are good, but you may not really be good. As a practitioner, if you assimilate yourself to this characteristic you are one that has attained the Tao—it’s just such a simple principle.” (Zhuan Falun)
I resolved to follow Teacher's Fa and assimilate myself to the characteristics of the universe - Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. On the train-ride back home, I asked my daughter, “Now that we have listened to Master Li Hongzhi's Fa lectures and have started practicing Falun Gong, do we address Him as Mr. Li Hongzhi or Teacher from now on?” My daughter replied, “We should address him as Teacher!” My daughter was only nine years old at the time.
After I returned home, I immediately made two changes in my life. First, I threw away all of the herbs and nutritional supplements that were in the house, even though some of them were very expensive. Second, I threw away a lot of military and philosophical books pertaining to the CCP. After I made these changes, I felt the air in my house become cleaner and brighter. I could feel a positive energy there.
Teacher is imparting the Fa of the universe. Although I had a very limited understanding of the Fa at that time, I decided that I must cultivate myself towards high levels because that is where Teacher is guiding me. I looked at Teacher's picture and said, “I shall follow Teacher and reach Consummation in this lifetime. I shall help more predestined people to learn about Falun Gong!”
I found peace in my heart and began to enjoy greeting my friends and neighbors. When I walk or climb the stairs, I feel as though I am floating with the wind. I used to be afraid of walking on the streets at night and would be terrified of any sound behind me, but that feeling soon disappeared as my confidence grew! My family, friends, colleagues, and neighbors have witnessed the miraculous transformation in my health, and many of them have started to practice Falun Gong as a result. By late 1994, twelve of my relatives and eighteen others were practicing Falun Gong. Spreading the Fa became the most important thing in my life. It is Teacher's Fa that has given me a new lease on life.
Teacher said:
“Certainly, it will not be easy for you to immediately lose all sorts of everyday people’s desires and reach the standard of a true practitioner, as it takes time to make it. When you hear me say that it takes time, you might say that Teacher has told us to take time, and so you will take time in doing so. That will not be permitted! You should be strict with yourself, though we allow you to improve gradually.” (Zhuan Falun)
Teacher also said:
“In cultivation of the Buddha Fa, you should strive forward vigorously.”
“It has been said: "When I come to this ordinary human society, it’s just like checking into a hotel for a few days. Then I leave in a hurry." Some people are just obsessed with this place and have forgotten their own homes.” (Zhuan Falun)
I said to Teacher in my heart, “I shall strive forward vigorously. I shall not be obsessed with this place and I shall return to my true home.”
When I visit my parents' house, I always volunteer to help with the chores. Due to my poor health, I never helped with any of the household chores in the past. Moreover, since I was the youngest in the family, my older siblings would let me have my own way, and my parents spoiled me.
I also used to have a phobia of germs. If anyone touched my glass, I would not use it. After my brother got married, my mother bought me my own set of plates, bowls, and utensils. I also liked to drink alcohol. My father had allowed me to drink since I was young, and I drank a lot of herbal wine after I became ill. My brother was shocked when he saw that I had stopped drinking alcohol after beginning Falun Gong practice.
After practicing for just a few months, I became very healthy. I was so energetic that I was even able to run two clothing boutiques. After the equity of the two boutiques grew, a friend of mine asked if I wanted to sell one to him. The market value was 100,000 yuan, but I let go of the thought of personal gain and sold it to him for 30,000 yuan. He was so pleased that he treated me to dinner. He also offered to buy discounted plane tickets for me. I politely told him that his generosity was not necessary.
A week later, he came back and complained that the boutique was overpriced. After my expenses of renovating the boutique, I did not make any profit selling it to him. He begged me to sell him a boutique and thanked me for the sale, but now he complained it was overpriced? I remembered that Teacher had told us that this is an opportunity to upgrade a practitioner's xinxing and transform their karma into virtue. So I told him, “Now that I practice Falun Gong, I must follow the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. If you think it was overpriced, I will give you 10,000 yuan back. If you no longer want to run the boutique, you may sell it back to me.” The next day I returned to the boutique and gave him 10,000 yuan. I thought that was the end of it.
It was just like what Teacher said:
“But normally when a problem arises, if it does not irritate a person psychologically, it does not count or is useless and cannot make him or her improve.” (Zhuan Falun)
The management of the mall then came to my boutique and told me that the store sign did not comply with the mall regulations and had to be taken down. Many people gathered to watch. I got up on the ladder and measured the sign. It was actually in compliance with the regulations, but the signs on the two adjacent stores did not comply. Yet the owners of those stores were not told to remove their signs. I felt humiliated in front of the crowd, but I knew the situation was for me to improve my xinxing.
When my father heard that I had sold a boutique, he thought I now had some extra cash, so he asked me to pay back the money that I had borrowed from him. I told him that I would send the money as soon as I was able to. But the next day my father showed up at my boutique and demanded the money back. He had always spoiled me in the past, but now he seemed to have lost all of his affection for me. I felt awful.
When I returned home, I read Zhuan Falun and opened the page to the section “Upgrading Xinxing,”
“Everything goes wrong. People mistreat him, and his boss also does not favor him. Even the situation at home becomes very tense. Why are there so many problems all of a sudden? This person himself might not get it. Because of his good inborn quality, he has reached a certain level that brings about this situation. Yet how can that be a practitioner’s final criterion for completing cultivation? It is far from the end of cultivation practice! You must continue to upgrade yourself. Because of that little amount of your inborn quality you have reached this state. In order to ascend further, the standard must be raised as well.” (Zhuan Falun)
At the next Fa study group, I shared my story with fellow practitioners. A practitioner commented, “You have let go of fame, personal gain, and sentimentality too fast.” I replied, “It is not too fast. I shall strive forward vigorously!”
In October 1995, my husband and I started hosting a Fa study group at our home. As more people started practicing Falun Gong and came to join our Fa study group, we had to remove our sofa to create more space. Besides our beds, we had few pieces of furniture left. With more people coming to watch Teacher's Fa lecture videos, my husband connected several TVs in different rooms so that people could watch them simultaneously. We studied the Fa as a group every day, until the evening of July 19, 1999. That was the day before the CCP began its suppression of Falun Gong.
With more people beginning to practice, there were not enough copies of Zhuan Falun available in our local bookstores. After the Chinese New Year of 1996, my husband and I decided to go to Beijing to obtain more copies of Zhuan Falun. We withdrew all of our money from the bank, and then left for Beijing. Fellow practitioners in Beijing had prepared nearly 1,000 copies of Zhuan Falun for us. We were ecstatic. It was not easy for us to make a trip to Beijing, so we wanted to bring more Falun Gong materials back with us. Thus, the Beijing practitioners gave us a lot of materials. They put everything into a taxi cab and took it to our hotel. The valet at the hotel even helped us to get them out of the cab and store them in the hotel. We thought only of bringing back more Falun Gong books and other materials, and forgot to think about shipping of the materials. We went to the post office, but they asked us for an ISBN number. We knew nothing about an ISBN number. We went to several shipping companies, but they refused to ship anything for us without an ISBN number.
My husband and I finally decided to bring the books and materials back on our own. We spent a full day packing everything, and had difficulty buying the train tickets back home. The boss of a fellow practitioner from our hometown happened to be traveling back home from a business trip in Beijing. He was very moved when he learned that we came all the way to Beijing at our own expense, so he bought us first-class train tickets through his connections, and then helped us move everything onto the train. He also later started practicing Falun Gong.
There was not enough space on the luggage racks in the train for all of our things. Other passengers helped to create additional space for us, but there still was not enough room. We were just about at our wits' end, when several of the train police came over. One of the officers knew my husband and came from the same hometown. They helped us to find additional room to store the books. This officer also started practicing Falun Gong later on.
When the train arrived at our stop, my brother-in-law, who worked at the train station, happened to be on duty. A dozen men, including my brother-in-law, his friends, and the train police made many trips to help carry everything out of the train station. Practitioners had been waiting for us in two cars. If it had not been for all the help we received throughout the entire trip, my husband and I would never have been able to bring back this amount of books and materials. We knew very well that Teacher's help had made it possible.
The volunteer assistant in our city later asked my husband to go to Shenyang to fetch more Falun Gong books. My husband asked me to go with him because he wanted me to help arrange the transport. A friend of mine managed to get a new truck for me, and my husband borrowed some tarps from the army barracks, which turned out to be brand new. Everything went miraculously well! This time we managed to bring back more than 3,000 copies of Zhuan Falun.
As I studied the Fa and practiced the exercises, I treasured Falun Gong all the more, and now I have a new understanding about the contents of Zhuan Falun and about life and the universe. Each time I upgrade my xinxing, Teacher manifests a new level of the Fa for me.
In 1996, I began to transcribe Zhuan Falun. After transcribing Zhuan Falun three times, I started to memorize all of Teacher's articles. I then started to memorize Zhuan Falun. By July 20, 1999, I had memorized Zhuan Falun twice. I truly felt what Teacher said:
“Cultivation depends on one’s own efforts, while the transformation of gong is done by one’s master.” (Zhuan Falun)
As I continued to study the Fa and memorize the Fa, I felt my body becoming big and tall when I practiced the exercises. When I did the sitting meditation, I felt my hands becoming enormous. My skin also became fine and smooth, and I didn't feel cold when I practiced the exercises outdoors in the winter. I have never felt sleepy when I studied the Fa, even after sleeping for only three or four hours a day. When I study Zhuan Falun, I see colorful Law Wheels next to each Chinese character. It is incredible. Sometimes I see each Chinese character in Zhuan Falun as a Buddha. When I am faced with a question or tribulation, I can always find the answer in Zhuan Falun.
I was fortunate to attend Teacher's Fa lecture to Falun Gong voluntary assistants on July 26, 1998. I feel incredibly lucky to be able to practice Falun Gong and to be one of Teacher's practitioners!
(To be continued)