(Minghui.org) I started practicing Falun Dafa in 1996 while still in high school. I went to graduate school after college, then landed a job as a doctor in a big city hospital.
My mother, wife, children, father-in-law, and mother-in-law continue to reside in my hometown, and I usually return to visit them during the holidays. My mother, wife, and mother-in-law are Falun Dafa practitioners, while my father-in-law is a staunch supporter of Dafa. This has resulted in a good cultivation environment within my family.
Most of my time each day is spent at work. I study the Fa after office hours and clarify the truth during my holidays. I used to think this dedicated time for studying the Fa and clarifying the truth was the only time I had for cultivation. In fact, the many conflicts I encountered at work were also good opportunities for me to improve my character. I would like to share some of my experiences cultivating at work.
1. Eliminating Resentment and Impatience
I have a strong sense of time management and plan my schedule ahead of time. As a doctor, punctuality is especially important as we have many duties to handle, such as handing over during shift change, conducting ward rounds, prescribing medication, attending surgeries, and so on. Hence, I found it hard to tolerate a resident doctor within my treatment group who always arrived late.
Although I reprimanded him a few times, he refused to change his ways. I stopped calling him out on his tardiness, but my resentment began to grow, until I could only see his shortcomings in everything he did. He refused to participate actively during surgical procedures, filled prescriptions halfheartedly, was lazy, and so on. Although on the surface our interactions remained unchanged, I secretly despised him. Through Fa study, I realized this colleague was helping me to cultivate by exposing my resentment!
Master said,“So in any situation, don’t be affected by human-type behavior, don’t be affected by human thoughts, and don’t be affected by the feelings and emotions in this world, either. Look more at the positives in others and less at the negatives.” (Teachings Given on Lantern Festival Day, 2003)
I eliminated my human notions and began to remind him quietly. I also tried to help him out and shared some of his workload. In response, this colleague changed his work attitude. Now, whenever I encounter similar situations, I look inwards and thank those who mistreated me from the bottom of my heart for helping me elevate in cultivation.
I was short-tempered and impatient. I got anxious waiting for the elevator and if it stopped at several floors before my destination. While doing patient consults, my patience was short-lived. Those who found it hard to follow my explanations faced my impatience or even anger: “I have already explained it clearly, yet you still can’t understand it?” Similarly, whenever our medical director took his time during an operating speed or answered his phone mid-procedure, I would get anxious and berate him internally for dragging his feet.
I discovered my lack of patience after looking inwards. This attitude also stemmed from my desire to finish work early so that I would have more time to rest. After realizing this, I paid special attention to maintaining a calm state of mind. My patience grew the more I practiced maintaining this state of mind, and my patients also started to understand more easily what I was trying to tell them. People started to praise me for my patience. Thinking back, I am truly ashamed of my previous behavior!
This impatience also manifested outside of work. Despite having more than enough time to catch a taxi to the train station, I got upset when I was unable to hail one right away. I started to worry about being late. Now, whenever these impatient thoughts arise, I actively try to get rid of them. Master has arranged every step of my journey, including the train I should take. Instead of worrying impatiently, I now spend my waiting time calmly reciting On Dafa or sending forth righteous thoughts.
I also realized that my negative thoughts were causing me to think the worst whenever I encountered a problem. For example, after unblocking the clogged air conditioner condenser duct, I continued to worry it would get clogged again. I would check and re-check it at intervals, unable to let it go. When my computer refused to start, I wondered if my infrequent use was causing the components to age prematurely. As a result, that really happened to my computer.
My mother would often remark, “Our thoughts are a form of energy, so don’t entertain bad thoughts.” Whenever I ran into a problem, I had the habit of thinking with my human notions instead of with my righteous thoughts. Master’s comment that “...the appearance stems from the mind.” (“Fa Teaching Given at the Epoch Times Meeting,” Collected Teachings Given Around the World Volume X) enlightened me. Now, I try to think positively while ridding myself of negative thoughts.
Recently, I asked a colleague to pick up my dinner in the cafeteria. Hospital staff have to present their staff passes to redeem meals, so I gave mine to my colleague. He picked up my dinner but discovered after his return that he had misplaced my staff pass. He returned to the cafeteria but couldn’t find it. After learning about the loss, my feelings of impatience and resentment surfaced. This occurred during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic when stricter controls on people’s movements were in place. Without my staff pass, entering or leaving the inpatient wards would be a hassle, not to mention my inability to redeem my meals or the added burden of re-applying for a new card.
Suddenly, I realized that this tribulation was a good thing, an opportunity to improve in levels. I instantly calmed down and told my colleague, “It’s okay. It cannot be lost. The card must have fallen in the cafeteria. Let’s look again. If we really can’t find it, I’ll apply for a new card.” By then, my resentment had completely vanished. Master must have seen my determination to improve and helped eliminate the bad substances obstructing my path. Our second visit to the cafeteria met with success. A staff member had found my card and held it for me. Looking inward truly eliminates all obstacles!
2. Showing Off and Jealousy
I used to have a strong attachment to showing off. Because my job included supervising medical students, mentoring junior doctors, and lecturing at a medical university, I unconsciously developed an attachment to showing off my abilities. I would earmark my more successful medical cases and surgeries to use as teaching examples. This attachment to showing off would also manifest whenever I lectured to students.
A trauma patient was admitted to our emergency department after a bad fall from an electric bicycle. CT scans revealed one side of his face had collapsed due to extensive fractures. The same fractures also prevented him from opening his mouth properly. Someone like that would typically be admitted for expensive surgery under general anesthesia. Because patients have to pay out-of-pocket for the internal fracture fixation implants used, they could end up being charged 40,000 to 50,000 yuan. Additionally, the procedure would leave significant scarring.
Because of these issues, for this person, I considered using an alternative method that involved setting the fractured bone through a small incision at the hairline. Recovery would be quicker and no hospitalization was required. It would cost only about 1,000 yuan. However, the procedure had a higher chance of failure and exposed the patient to severe side effects, such as internal bleeding, facial nerve damage, and facial paralysis. Because of the risks involved, most doctors refuse to do it.
After assessing the situation and concluding that this approach was in the best interest of the patient, I decided to go ahead and do the operation in the outpatient clinic. Because I had successfully done this same procedure on two patients previously, I had a certain degree of confidence. Because this procedure was rarely done, several junior doctors specially came to watch and learn. The operation was a success. The patient’s face returned to normal, and he was able to open his mouth. CT scans afterward verified that it was highly successful, and a very grateful patient thanked us.
Afterward, I systematically explained what I’d done to the junior doctors. I was overcome with joy when everyone praised me. Over the next few days, my mind became so preoccupied with thoughts about this case that I could not even concentrate when I was studying the Fa. I became instantly alert. “Is it due to my strong desire to show off and seek fame? How terrible, I don’t want it!” I sent forth righteous thoughts to rid myself of these thoughts.
I also looked inwards to determine if I was treating my patients based on my own selfishness or in order to show off and seek fame. Careful reflection revealed I harbored this selfish mentality quite often while going about my daily work! From then on, I began paying attention to this attachment, rejecting these selfish thoughts whenever they appeared in my mind.
My grades from elementary school to university were always among the best. My exemplary performance at work was often praised. As a result, I developed a strong sense of pride and jealousy, which made it hard to accept criticism. This flaw remained undetected for a very long time.
For instance, in the area of diagnosis, whenever my opinion ran contrary to that of my peers, I would refuse to accept I was wrong, and my emotions would be in turmoil. To prove I was right, I would do exhaustive research and collect evidence to prove my theory. The same applied whenever we made plans for surgery. I would get angry if aspects of the surgery were arranged contrary to my wishes, to the point I even wanted to avoid participating in the operation. In extreme cases, I even hoped that the surgeon who’d decided on an entirely different procedure would have problems during the operation.
On one occasion, a medical director went ahead with a surgical plan against my advice. As a result, the operation took unnecessarily long and the results were not good. Afterward, I pointed out the flaws in his plan to others, while gloating at his misfortune.
I used to agree to do simple but tedious surgical procedures unwillingly, preferring instead to take on difficult cases that could showcase my abilities. Thinking back, I am ashamed of my strong attachment to showing off!
After realizing my attachments, I changed my attitude and agreed to do every procedure willingly, cooperating with others to the best of my abilities. I learned to express my opinions with sincerity and to accept the other party’s decision without anger, even if my ideas were not adopted. Instead of agonizing over who was right or wrong, I learned to look inwards for my flaws. That way, almost every day became a learning opportunity for cultivation improvement.
3. Eliminating an Everyday Person’s Concept of Modern Medicine
Because I had spent years treating patients, the concept of “modern medicine” became firmly entrenched in my mind. Treating everyday people by applying modern medical concepts is the right thing to do. Whenever I encountered illness karma tribulations, however, this habitual concept would generate severe interference, leading to my inability to distinguish what was real and what was false.
For example, whenever I started having illness symptoms, the first thoughts that came to mind were the concepts of modern medicine I used at work. From symptoms and physiological analysis, my mind would come up with possible blood tests and physical exams to run before postulating a possible diagnosis and subsequent treatment options. These thoughts would run through my mind with a vengeance.
Later, I became aware that these thoughts were not from my original, true self. Instead, these false notions were developed out of human concepts or forcibly imposed by the old forces. Admitting to them would enable them to control me. From then on, I began to send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate these acquired human medical concepts and factors imposed by the old forces.
After realizing my negative thoughts and ingrained human medical concepts that were not applicable to practitioners, I resolved to reject this false illusion, regardless of the symptoms: “My body is a vessel given by Master in order to validate the Fa and save sentient beings! I will adhere to Master’s wishes and follow the path arranged by Master!” Under Master’s compassionate guidance, I overcame this illness tribulation.
In the process of overcoming this tribulation, I discovered the importance of believing in Master and the Fa. Dafa practitioners are cautioned not to adopt extreme measures, so I realized I should not give up learning new medical knowledge. I needed to do that so I would be good at my profession well. The relationship between cultivation and work should be well balanced. Dafa practitioners must learn how to cultivate within ordinary human society, conforming to society’s norms while adhering to cultivation requirements.
I resolved to improve my medical expertise so I could heal patients more effectively. This resolution is not in conflict with our cultivation requirements. When we encounter conflicts and difficulties, we must act according to the standards of a cultivator, look inward, and get rid of ordinary people’s notions. Shunning new knowledge or quitting one’s job is not in line with Dafa’s requirements. My ability to cultivate to higher levels in such an environment can only be attributed to the mighty virtue Master has bestowed upon me.
I discovered my attachment to pride while going through the following illness karma test. I walked with a limp because my leg hurt. One of my colleagues noticed and said, “What’s wrong? Let me arrange an MRI scan for you.” Yet another person offered, “Let me treat your foot with physiotherapy and heat therapy.” Although I politely declined, these offers infringed upon my sense of pride. I was ashamed to display my incorrect cultivation state to others and felt inadequate when faced with my colleagues’ displays of concern. What triggered these questions from my colleagues? I searched inwards and discovered my attachments to pride and fame. After letting go of these attachments, my colleagues stopped talking about my injury.
4. Encourage Fellow Cultivators
While practicing the exercises at my university’s sports stadium, I befriended a fellow practitioner around my age. A diligent cultivator, he continued to practice Dafa even after the CCP started the persecution in 1999. After graduating from university, he acquired a job in a different big city. In his spare time, he would produce truth-clarification materials on his own, passing some on to me whenever he visited.
Initially, fear and laziness held me back. However, with continued encouragement and help from this fellow practitioner, I managed to resume my cultivation. Unfortunately, his mobile number was canceled, and we lost touch over the last two years. Recently, we managed to reconnect when he gave me a call.
He then described the tribulations he endured over the past two years. His father had suddenly fallen ill. Juggling caretaking duties with his career had left him little to no time for Fa study and sending forth righteous thoughts. One night, he suddenly fell unconscious and his family took him to the hospital. Doctors diagnosed a cerebral hemorrhage and did a craniotomy to treat it. After the surgery, there was more intracranial bleeding, forcing his doctors to operate a second time.
He told me, “This ruthless attack was arranged by the old forces. Master stopped them and saved my life.” Afterward, he began to suffer weakness on one side of his body, along with occasional seizures. Because his family members were not cultivators of Dafa, and his Fa-study group had been disbanded, he found it hard to sustain a proper cultivation environment. I began to encourage him, saying, “Don’t be disheartened. With Master looking over us, we will make it through!”
5. Cultivating in Ordinary Human Society
Sometimes when we clarify the truth face-to-face, people will ask, “You are so young—how can you believe in Falun Gong?” I reply, “Because this practice is good!” The majority of practitioners who clarify the truth face-to-face are elderly women. Middle-aged men like myself are in the minority, so I cherish every opportunity to do this in person. By setting a personal example, I find a few words are sufficient for me to clarify the truth. Even saying a single line “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good” is considered validating the Fa and walking the path Master has arranged.
I do not own a smartphone or use WeChat. I also do not browse the Internet often. My colleagues used to consider me “an oddball.” Their confusion has slowly evolved into admiration: “This person is truly cultured!”
Whenever my colleagues start to gossip, I try to avoid participating. Whenever I find it hard to escape, I look inwards and wonder if these morally corrupt topics concern me in any way. For example, when they discussed someone’s extramarital affair, I wondered if this was a hint that I was attached to lust. Whenever they talked about a person behind their back, I wondered if I had ever done the same out of jealousy. Master arranged this cultivation environment for me so that I can work on eliminating ordinary human notions.
Conclusion
Looking back, I encountered few outstanding miracles. The true meaning of cultivation is often reflected in small, day-to-day things. Nothing happens by accident, and whenever I look inwards during a conflict, I can feel Master looking at me with a smile.
I will cherish myself, my fellow practitioners, and my cultivation environment, and I seize whatever time is left to cultivate well so that I can face Master with a clear conscience!
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